Notes
by crockywock
Summary: Imagine McGonagall and Snape pinning notes at each other's door. Innocent little notes, to do with everyday business at Hogwarts. Reminders of staff meetings and so forth. Jinxed, of course, so that no student can read them.
1. When Things Started

**Author's notes:** Yes, another pathetic I'll-Do-What-I-Can-To-Avoid-Descriptions fic. Imagine McGonagall and Snape pinning notes at each other's door. Innocent little notes, to do with everyday business at Hogwarts. Reminders of staff meetings and so forth. Jinxed, of course, so that students cannot read them. You'll need to picture very clearly what happens between those letters. Dates are important, too, that's why I added them. Have fun sneaking around in our two favourite Hogwarts professors' private lives and leave, if you wish, a little note yourself when you have finished. Hope you enjoy the piece.

* * *

**Notes**

**_First series of notes: Feb 83 - Jul 85_**

February 10th, 1983

Dear Severus,

Just writing to thank you for the splendid evening and to point out that the roast beaf was delicious. You really are an excellent cook.

Minerva.

** 

February 11th, 1983

Dear Minerva,

Just writing to point out that I ordered the roast beef at the Three Broomsticks in Hogsmeade. I cannot cook.

Severus.

* * *

November 19th, 1983

Dear Severus,

Just writing to remind you of the staff meeting at nine o'clock.

Minerva.

** 

November 20th, 1983

Dear Minerva,

Just writing to thank you for the reminder.

Severus.

** 

November 20th, 1983

Do I get the feeling that you are not taking me quite seriously, Severus?

** 

November 21st, 1983

Dear Minerva,

I would not dare take you - seriously or not.

Severus.

* * *

January 12th, 1984

Dear Severus,

Staff meeting at nine.

Minerva.

* * *

March 3rd, 1984

Dear Minerva,

Congratulations on your spectacular performance against Ravenclaw. I am impressed.

Severus.

** 

March 4th, 1984

Dear Severus,

I'd appreciate if you kept your unprofessional comments to yourself. We are still in the lead, after all.

Minerva.

PS: Your seeker could do with losing some weight.

* * *

June 3rd, 1984

Dear Minerva,

Three Galleons on the outcome of the match tomorrow.

Severus.

** 

June 3rd, 1984

Deal.

** 

June 4th, 1984

Dear Severus,

My sincerest greetings.

Minerva.

** 

June 4th, 1984

You are not funny.

** 

June 5th, 1984

Dear Severus,

I am truly sorry. Care for a glass of butterbeer at Rosmerta's tonight?

Minerva.

** 

June 5th, 1984

Busy.

* * *

September 1st, 1984

Dear Severus,

Albus asked me to remind you that this year's first staff meeting will be in Hogsmeade. Three Broomsticks, nine o'clock. Please bring the Quidditch timetable!

Minerva.

** 

September 1st, 1984

It was your turn to set up the Quidditch timetable.

Greetings, Severus.

** 

September 1st, 1984

Dear Severus,

We agreed at the end of last term that whoever failed to win the Quidditch cup would have to do the next timetable. I suggest you better hurry up.

Minerva.

** 

September 1st, 1984

Dear Minerva,

I cannot recall such agreement, but I will set up a timetable nevertheless to make sure not all the Slytherin matches are in mid-winter or brooding heat again.

Severus.

** 

September 1st, 1984

Are you suggesting Gryffindor cheated, Severus Snape?

** 

September 1st, 1984

No. I am suggesting YOU cheated. See you tonight.

** 

September 2nd, 1984

Dear Severus,

I am sorry for losing control last night. I was tired and upset about a letter I hat received from Dedalus Diggle that was once again full of inconsiderate statements about Albus and the way he runs the school. I believe your team is very well trained and Thymiane Flint is a very capable captain, just to clear that up. And you are right, Gryffindor would not have won half their games had it not been for Charlie Weasley.

Minerva.

** 

September 3rd, 1984

Dear Minerva,

Thank you for clearing that up. I fully agree with you and suggest a well placed curse to solve the Diggle-problem.  
Have a good start of term.

Severus.

* * *

February 14th, 1985

Dear Severus,

Remember to give out the timetables for the N.E.W.T.s before the end of the week,, will you? A couple of parents complained about last year's lack of organization.  
Happy Valentine's day.

Minerva.

** 

February 14th, 1985

Dear Minerva,

Thanks for the reminder. I had almost forgotten.

Severus.

* * *

February 21st, 1985

Dear Severus,

Perhaps I was wrong about your Beaters being as stupid as oversized, but both of them keep fouling on purpose, and I want you to put an end to this.

Minerva.

** 

February 22nd, 1985

Dear Minerva,

Wilson and Clark both declared that the accident was neither provoked nor intended. Hope Weasley gets better soon.

Severus.

* * *

April 26th, 1985

Dear Severus,

Meet you in the Three Broomsticks tonight. No refusal accepted.

Minerva.

** 

April 26th, 1985

See you at seven then.

** 

April 27th, 1985

Dear Severus,

Thank you very much indeed for the splendid evening. I enjoyed our conversation and would carry on with pleasure, if we could find a convenient time and occasion.

Minerva.

** 

April 27th, 1985

Tonight at seven?

** 

April 27th, 1985

Dear Severus,

Thank you very much indeed for the invitation, but I am afraid I have to decline. We are playing Hufflepuff and I was specifically asked to come and watch. The team seems to think they cannot manage this by themselves. But you can join me, if you like. I believe Albus said he was going to join us as well.

Minerva.

** 

April 27th, 1985

I'd rather not. Watching the Hufflepuff team is usually quite amusing, but I do not think I can stand watching another Gryffindor victory. Have a nice evening!

Severus.

* * *

June 7th, 1985

Dear Minerva,

It was only when the N.E.W.T.s results were given out today that I realized that half the Gryffindor team are taking their leave this year. Since the situation is about the same in Slytherin, do you think the Quidditch trials should be held before the summer break?

Severus.

** 

June 8th, 1985

Dear Severus,

Marvellous idea! The first years will be delighted. And the sooner I look out for a new Charlie Weasley, the better.

Minerva.

** 

June 8th, 1985

You won't find one.

Severus.

** 

June 12th, 1985

Dear Severus,

Trials will be held at June 27th.

Minerva.

* * *

June 28th, 1985

Dear Severus,

I had to think about what you said at the pub last night. Do you think Albus was being serious? He sometimes jokes around without much consideration. Anyway, I think it is essential than one can talk to someone about everything. You know you can always talk to me, Severus. But in case you don't want to, I had another interesting idea this morning: you might want to start a diary. That will keep your thoughts clear and it is very much like talking to a very good, trusted friend. Albus told me that he found a diary to be a refreshing change from his Pensieve, because you have to rearrange your thoughts in order to write them down and thus get a clearer idea of them. See you at the feast tomorrow.

Minerva.

** 

June 28th, 1985

Dear Minerva,

What's that nonsense? My mind is in perfect order. And I have never had problems with my Pensieve. Thank you for you concern, but I am very capable of keeping my thoughs straight without keeping a freaking diary.  
Yes, see you tomorrow.

Severus.

* * *

July 7th, 1985

Dear Severus,

Have a nice summer break and a good time in Transylvania!

Love, Minerva.


	2. When Things Got Complicated

**_Second series of notes: Aug 85 - Nov 85 _**

August 20th, 1985

Dear Severus,

I am writing to you, because I am terribly upset, sad, extremely angry and, to tell the truth, in great need of a sensible person to share my thoughts with.  
A little more than a week ago I got a letter from Algie Longbottom. He let me know that they still have not found a cure for Frank and Alice. (I find this unbelievable. How long can it take to research on a matter as important as this?) I was very annoyed and wrote a letter to St. Mungo's asking them if they were going to wait until the Longbottom's son was old enough to do the research himself. I got a very rude answer this morning and spontaneously decided to pay that wretched hospital a visit.  
When I arrived, however, I met Frank's mother Fay and the boy. She had just taken him to visit them. Can you believe it, Severus? They actually make him visit his parents, being in the desolate state they are.  
Sorry, I am so upset. I cannot understand why a civilised magic society like ours seems incapable of dealing with an ancient curse like Cruciatus. One should think they'd have found a counter curse by now.  
I was so distressed at the sight of the boy that I changed my mind and did not stop by, even for a short visit. I could not bring myself to do it, somehow.  
Why, oh why did this have to happen? And to make things perfectly unbearable, Fay told me that Neville has not shown any signs of magic yet. They fear the Memory Charm might have damaged his brain permanently, as he is very slow on taking up things. They say there is a possibility that he does not possess any magical powers at all. Do you think a Memory Charm could do that? I am still not sure whether it was a good idea to place it on him. He might not have seen anything after all. Hope to hear from you soon.

Love,  
Minerva.

** 

August 22nd, 1985

Dear Minerva,

My compliments to your excellent owl. England Transsylvania within fourty-eight hours is not something just any owl could achieve. Do you suppose I could borrow her for urgent letters, back at Hogwarts?  
Hope you have composed yourself by now. Although I can understand your feelings, it will be of no help to anyone if you lose control over matters that are clearly out of your hands...  
Personally, I have seen both, Frank and Alice, only once after the attack. I agree that it is rather disturbing to see them, but there are more important things that require our attention these days. I trust you have heard about the latest sighting? He certainly seems to be getting stronger, though we are still checking the sources.  
Do not trouble yourself too much - I am sure the specialists at St. Mungo's will find a way to help the Longbottoms very soon. See you in a week's time.

Severus.

* * *

August 30th, 1985

Dear Severus,

It has been a pleasure talking to you again tonight. I know you think I overreacted on the Longbottoms' case, but you know, of course, that Alice and I have been very close friends. And it was only now I realized about Neville. He will have to grow up with Fay. I suppose I still cannot believe that this happened such a long time after You-Know-Who's downfall.  
See you at the staff meeting tomorrow.

Minerva.

** 

August 30th, 1985

I understand.

* * *

September 6th, 1985

Dear Severus,

Please accept my apology for criticizing you in front of Weasley and Banks. I was very upset about the latest sighting. You have to understand that I did not intend to be so rude and I know perfectly well that you are a very capable teacher, although I cannot bring myself to accept the way some students fear you. It seems wrong.

Minerva.

** 

September 7th, 1985

Dear Minerva,

I know you do not approve of my methods, but I can assure you they work for me. And the Slytherins at the very least need a firm hand. Most of them cannot tell right and wrong apart. They need someone to give them an idea of how to manage their life and where certain paths lead. As for your highly inconsiderate remark about me favouring my own students above all others, I do believe it has spread like a wildfire. Thanks for that new reputation.  
With regard to everything else: apology accepted.

Severus.

* * *

November 13th, 1985

Dear Minerva,

Shall we have dinner at Rosmerta's after the fist Quidditch match of the season?

Severus.

** 

November 13th, 1985

Dear Severus,

Is that an invitation? What has gotten into you lately? I accept with pleasure. Tonight at seven?

Yours Minerva.

** 

November 13th, 1985

Dear Mineva,

I am merely assuming you will need a cheering conversation afterwards.

Severus.

** 

November 13th, 1985

Don't be ridiculous. I do not care if you beat Hufflepuff or not. You will lose against Ravenclaw for sure, so there is no need for me to worry.

Minerva.

** 

November 13th, 1985

Do not be too sure of that. And in any case, you will need a victory against Slytherin to get the cup.

Severus.

** 

November 13th, 1985

To be honest, that is no great concern of mine. See you at seven.

Minerva.

** 

November 13th, 1985

Yes, see you tonight.

Severus.

** 

November 15th, 1985

We need to talk.

Minerva.

** 

November 16th, 1985

Severus, this is not easy for me either. I want to talk to you!

Minerva.

** 

November 17th, 1985

For the last time, I want to talk to you, or Albus will hear of this.

Minerva.

** 

November 17th, 1985

What need is there to talk? You know the Hogwarts staff policy.

Severus.

** 

November 17th, 1985

Yes, I do. That is why I want to talk to you. To clear things up. Visit me at eleven tonight when the students are in bed.

Minerva.

** 

November 17th, 1985

I do not like the sound of that.  
I will be there.

Severus.

* * *

November 18th, 1985

Severus, you coward! You could at least have had the guts to inform me of your sudden departure. Don't you think your little job in Transsylvania will solve this problem. I will wait for you. I want to talk.

Minerva.

** 

November 20th, 1985

Dear Minerva,

I am really sorry. I swear I was going to come, but when the Headmaster called and told me I had to go to Transsylvania, there was not enough time for me to call off our meeting. And apparently, there was no way for me to have him deliver a message. Will be back as soon as my mission is accomplished.

Miss you,  
Severus.

** 

November 22nd, 1985

Dear Severus,

I am well aware that this situation must be extremely strange for you. And I must say I have not experienced anything like it either. Writing all those little notes seems to have given both of us the impression that we know each other very well. Better, perhaps, than is actually the case.  
I can, however, assure you that I was not drunk when I said that I have fallen in love with you. It is the truth, strange as it may seem to either of us. Hope you return soon.

Sincerely,  
Minerva.

** 

November 24th, 1985

Dear Minerva,

I understand. What do you suggest?

Severus.

** 

November 26th, 1985

Dear Severus,

You must be mad, sending your poor owl from Transsylvania to England with just nine words in your letter. Anyway, I suggest we forget the whole matter and get back to our normal lives. It is too strenuous to keep up a relationship at Hogwarts without anyone noticing. Especially Albus, as you are probably well aware.  
There is, of course, a reason why Albus cannot allow relations or marriages among the staff. I am not sure if he has ever told you that it is an additional security precaution.  
And because I do not believe either of us wishes to leave Hogwarts, I think it would be best if we pretended to have been drunk that specific evening at Rosmerta's and that nothing had really happened.  
My best wishes for you mission.

Minerva.

** 

November 28th, 1985

Dear Minerva,

I agree. We will just go back to being colleagues again. Will presumably be back in about four or five days. Do not know why the Headmaster needed me down here in the first place.

Greetings,  
Severus.


	3. When Things Were Easy

**_Third series of notes: June 86 - Aug 88 _**

June 4th, 1986

Buahahaha! What kind of performance was that??? Your seeker is barely able to stick to a broom.

Severus.

** 

June 4th, 1986

Dear Severus,

I thought we had agreed on not to write any more notes? How dare you speak of my HIGHLY talented seeker in such an impertinent and unprofessional manner? But I must agree, he looks like an apple on a dead twig.  
Congratulations on the Quidditch cup - for the first time in YEARS.

Minerva.

** 

June 4th, 1986

Thank you. And sorry about the note. Will try and stick to our agreement from now on.

Severus.

* * *

August 10th, 1988

Dear Severus,

Sorry to break our agreement of not writing to each other, but something miraculous has happened and I just have to share it since no one seems to be available this summer apart from Albus, who knows already: Neville has shown first signs of magic. You know whom I am talking about, don't you? Neville Longbottom has finally proven that he is not a squib. Can anthing make these holidays any better? I think not.  
By the way, I heard Amos's son is about to join us. There is a good chance that he will be in Gryffindor, meaning that you have won the Quidditch Cup for the last time this year, my friend.

Minerva.

** 

August 12th, 1988

Dear Minerva,

Am enjoying my holidays in Germany, hunting vampire slayers. It is a lot of fun, but I am glad to come home in a few days time. Has Albus mentioned anything about the Philosopher's Stone to you, by the way? They seem to intend to move it to Gringott's. The most ridiculous idea I have heard in years. What place could be safer than Hogwarts?  
Oh, and don't expect too much of young Diggory. I hear he possesses a lot of Gryffindor qualities, but he is also a horrible coward. And I might just mention that his father was in Slytherin.

Happy holidays,  
Severus.

** 

August 15th, 1988

Dear Severus,

Albus has not been talking to me, but I am going to meet him in The Hog's Head next Saturday. Care to join us?

Minerva.

** 

August 17th, 1988

Dear Minerva,

I would love to, but I do not think I will return before the end of the month. And in any case, I avoid The Hog's Head when I can. Aberforth makes me nervous.

Severus.

** 

August 20th, 1988

Dear Severus,

Have been talking to Albus. It was quite an enjoyable evening, actually. Aberforth is not too bad, once you get used to his goat hanging around - literally.  
Hope to see you back any day now. Can't belive another school year lies before us. My holidays, at the very least, have been far too short and packed with work once more.  
See you soon, I suppose.

Love,  
Minerva.


	4. When Things Had To Be

**_Fourth series of notes: Oct 88 - Jun 89_**

October 28th, 1988

Dear Minerva,

I regretfully apologize. I did not intend to hurt you.

Severus.

**

October 29th, 1988

I am sorry, too. Let's not mention it again.

**

October 30th, 1988

Minerva, I cannot help feeling that we should talk this time.

Severus

**

October 30th, 1988

Dear Severus,

You are right, of course. But we cannot do so before the Halloween feast. There's too much work to accomplish. Can I meet you at Halloween's eve down at Rosmerta's?

Minerva.

**

October 30th, 1988

Dear Minerva,

Yes, I think that is a very good idea. I'll be there at around 11 o'clock.

Severus.

* * *

Madame Rosmerta's diary, 1 November, 1988

Dear diary,

I have to write this down, because it is so sweet and so sad at the same time. I feel completely lost because I know I cannot do anything to help those two people I am going to write about but have to watch them come here once every couple of weeks, talking over a glass of butterbeer.

Let me tell you about a beautiful and very tragic evening in 1988. 31 October it was - yesterday. I had just finished hovering and stripping the beds and was happily welcoming more and more guests to the bar, as it was getting dark and no one felt the need to be outside after sunset on an evening like this. It was at exactly ten to seven when Severus Snape entered the bar, fully aware that his black robes were billowing threateningly behind him. He glanced around and sat down at the table nearest to the entrance, looking both, apprehensive and tired. He placed an arm at the window still, looked in my direction and raised his eyebrows. I hurried to provide him with some butterbeer at once.

'Good evening, Professor,' I said and smiled. 'How was the Quidditch match?'

'Good, good,' he muttered. 'Just as we expected. An impressive two-hundred to thirty victory. The Hufflepuff team are no match for our new seeker.'

'Who is it?'

'You cannot have met him,' he muttered. 'He's only in his second year. Joined the team when Simons left Hogwarts this year, but I think he is very talented. I certainly believe he has the ability of bringing us over the next six years without too much embarrassment. Mind you - can't come any worse, can it?' He took a huge gulp of butterbeer and watched me with the usual gleam of suspicion in his eyes. I got the feeling that he was slightly more nervous than usual.

'Are you expecting someone?' I requested to know. 'Shall I draw you some more chairs?'

'This one will do,' he replied with a thoughtful look. 'It is just Minerva.'

And indeed, at this very moment the newly elected deputy headmistress of Hogwarts stepped into the bar, looking around in exactly the same way as Snape had. When spotting us at the table next to the entrance door she smiled and approached our table. From the corner of my eyes I saw Snape leaping up for a very formal handshake.

'Minerva,' he said, motioning her to sit down. 'It's good to see you. Can we have some more butterbeer, Rosmerta?'

'Actually,' McGonagall said quickly, 'not for me. My day has been rather stressful. I could do with some good French wine instead.'

'Red or white?' I asked, feeling very professional until Snape gave me a disturbingly foul look. McGonagall smiled.

'Red please,' she said. 'What do you have?'

'I can offer you a very nice Chateau Magique,' I replied. 'All vintage years worth mentioning from 1893 to 1987. Which would you prefer?'

'I know you have a wide rage, Rosmerta,' she said approvingly. 'Give me whatever you think fitting for this occasion. And bring two glasses, please. I hate drinking alone.'

I hurried to obey her wishes and returned about ten minutes later with some of my best wines. By the time of my return, both Professors were caught up in a heated discussion.

'Seventy to ten after only twenty minutes,' I heard Snape exclaim. 'You call that an easy game? And it was freezing. I should think you'd be able to recognize an outstanding achievement when you see one.'

'Outstanding,' Professor McGonagall said in what seemed an offended way. 'Have you watched us play Ravenclaw in 1982? No, you haven't. Of course you haven't. You never saw any of our good games - except all those against Slytherin, that is, where you couldn't talk yourself out of coming to the match.'

'When did you ever _do_ a really good game against Slytherin?' Snape said coldly. 'Seriously, when have you ever been in the lead before your seeker got the bloody Snitch?'

'I can tell you that exactly,' McGonagall snapped, 'in chronologically reverse order: 1982, 1981, 1979, 1972, 1967, 1961, 1953...'

'Stop, stop, stop!'

I saw with some surprise that Snape was laughing. Something I had not seen him do very often, not even as a boy. Indeed, I would never have imagined him capable of a perfectly relaxed conversation, had I not seen him talk to Minerva McGonagall on countless occasions.

'That is before I was even born,' he now stated, his eyes glittering in a somewhat playful manner. 'The outcome of Quidditch matches before my time are of no great interest to me, to be honest.'

It was only then McGonagall realized that I was still standing next to the table, holding on to the Chateau Magique more firmly than necessary.

'I'm sorry, Rosmerta,' she said. 'Please sit down and have a glass of wine with us, will you?'

'I'd love to, but there is a lot left for me to do,' I replied, 'so no alcohol for me before closing time.'

She nodded. I left, deciding that my duties would not prevent me from keeping an eye, or better: an ear, on the conversation.

It was getting late. The only two guests left now were the two Professors.

'I am glad to have seen another Hallowe'en pass without too many fatal accidents,' McGonagall said. 'The end of October keeps making me uncomfortable. Reminds me of Lily's and James's death, you see. And of young Harry being forced to live those... Muggles.'

Snape's lips curled. 'I am sure he is perfectly happy,'

'Oh I forgot,' McGonagall muttered, realizing that she might have chosen the wrong subject of conversation. 'Your sympathy might be limited, of course. But I can't get the whole matter out of my head at the moment - now that Neville seems to do fairly well.'

'It seems odd to me that you should take so much interest especially in those two,' said Snape coldly. 'I wonder what role a certain prophecy-'

'Don't mention the prophecy!' said Professor McGonagall quickly. 'Not in here, anyway. And no, this has nothing to do with my worries. They're of a more personal nature. You know how close Alice and I have been. Naturally I'd be interested in seeing her only son grow up safely. And yes, of course I am specially interested in Harry Potter. Everyone is, these days. You've heard about the lastest sighting of You-Know-Who?'

'Of course I have,' Snape muttered. 'You know I never fail to notice any of his movements. Especially when he is getting stronger.'

'I forgot,' McGonagall admitted. 'That must be unnerving. It is stressful enough to _hear_ about them...'

'It is - bearable.' Snape said curtly, making it perfectly clear that the topic was closed. McGonagall smiled and took his hand.

'I am glad to have you to talk to, you know. I am not sure I could bear all this if it weren't for you.'

With an obvious amount of effort Snape withdrew his hand, frowning slightly.

'Don't.'

'It is not against the rules for me to hold your hand, is it?' McGonagall said in forced whispering. 'The policy doesn't forbid feelings, even if proper relationships are banned.'

'I know that,' Snape muttered. 'It is just... I don't want any more trouble.'

'Nor do I,' McGonagall sighed. 'Merlin knows it is difficult enough already.' And she let go of Snape's hand.

For a very long time they were just sitting there, watching each other, without talking. Then Professor McGonagall rose.

'it is late. We should return to the castle.'

'Excellent idea,' Snape said relieved and got up. 'I could do with some rest as well. Le't just hope your students are in bed.'

McGongall smiled. 'It is not only Gryffindors who break the school rules, Severus.'

'No, but they are the only ones stupid enough to get caught all the time,' said Snape and his lip curled again. He extended his arm to Professor McGonagall, who took it gladly. When their bodies touched I felt a shiver run through both Professors, and they gave each other a look that, at first, made no sense to me at all, then, however, became quite apparent when, much to my astonishment (and their own, it seemed), their lips met in a deep and passionate kiss. There was so much intensity in this movement that I took an unintentional step backwards out of mere surprise and almost stumbled.

The scene ended as abruptly as it had begun. Both Professors seemed to pull back at the same time and McGonagall grabbed the front of Snape's robes with a resolute grip.

'This has GOT to stop!' she hissed, panting slightly. 'It is stupid and dangerous!'

Snape nodded. 'I agree.'

'We'll just have to avoid seeing each other.'

I agree.'

'And touching.'

'I agree.'

'And we shouldn't come here anymore either.'

'I agree.'

The unavoidable kiss that followed made me chuckle. Snape looked up in alarm and withdrew at once. McGonagall followed his gaze.

'There is an empty room on the first floor,' I said quietly. 'Number thirty-three. You are very welcome to stay if you wish.'

Snape and McGonagall exchanged a look. Snape shrugged, almost imperceptibly, and McGonagall nodded.

'Can we have another bottle of wine then?' she said. 'I am not sure I'll live through this otherwise.'

A moment later both had vanished up the staircase.

* * *

November 28th, 1988 

Dear Severus,

Do not forget the staff meeting tonight. Albus counts on us to re-organize our schedules for when Ian returns from his year off.

Minerva.

**

November 28th, 1988

Dear Minerva,

Thanks for the reminder. When is Quirrel coming back? I suppose it is him you talk about? I never knew his first name was Ian...

Severus.

* * *

November 29th, 1988

Dear Severus,

Thank you very much for offering help with the remaining timetables, but I believe I will be able to manage. It will certainly take me a few days, but I expect to come round to see the Quidditch match next Saturday nevertheless. Will you be there?

Minerva.

**

November 29th, 1988

Is that an invitation?

**

November 29th, 1988

Yes.

**

November 29th, 1988

I accept.

**

November 29th, 1988

See you tomorrow afternoon then. And remember: no touchy! Albus will be there.

Minerva.

* * *

December 28th, 1988

Dear Minerva,

How are you? Hope you are having a good time in the Scottish Highlands. Merlin knows, I could use a vacation as well. Anyway, I am writing to you because, believe it or not, the Headmaster smelled a rat during the Christmas feast and decided to approach me. I had not expected him to ask directly, but naturally told him the truth when he did. I said we had some problems fighting off our... err... feelings and he seemed to understand. Told me we were very welcome to take a year off if we needed to sort out our private life, but I declined. I said we would be able to handle this without giving next year's timetable the coup de grace. Hopefully, you agree with my opinion. I can, of course, only speak for myself. Hope to hear from you before Dumbledore does.

Love, Severus.

**

January 1st, 1989

Dear Severus,

Am enjoying my trip. Weather is horrible. Yes, I shall speak to you before I return to Hogwarts. Shall we meet at a neutral place, say... The Three Broomsticks? Love you.

Minerva.

**

**Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, staff register**

14 June, 1989  
Three members of the staff are going to take a year off, starting next term:  
Professor Minerva McGonagall,  
Professor Severus Snape,  
Professor Zacharias Kettleburn.  
Temporary substitute teachers have been found for each subject.  
Transfiguration and Headship of Gryffindor: Professor Moody  
Potions and Headship of Slytherin: Professor Diggory  
Care of Magical Creatures: Professor Grubbly-Planks.  
The post of the deputy headmaster will temporarily be filled by Professor Emeric Flitwick.


	5. When Things Startled

_**Fifth series of notes: Aug 90 - May 91**_

August 31st, 1990

Staff meeting at nine. Three Broomsticks.

Minerva.

** 

August 31st, 1990

I know! There is no need to give me a separate invitation each time.

Severus.

** 

August 31st, 1990

Forgive my impertinence, oh Master of Perfection. I will refrain from giving you mental push-ups from now on, although you most definitely need them.

Minerva.

* * *

September 23rd, 1990

I demand that you change the Quidditch timetable at once! This is ridiculous.

Severus.

** 

September 24th, 1990

I have no idea what you mean. The timetable looks perfect to me. I would not change it now, even if it was possible. You might have noticed that we are in the middle of a new term. Personally, I think Alastor did an excellent job on it. I see absolutely no problem in having Slytherin play Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw within three weeks during exam time.

Minerva.

** 

September 25th, 1990

Please yourself. This will, of course, not be the first time Gryffindor win the cup as a result of blatant cheating.

Severus.

** 

September 26th, 1990

I demand that you take that remark back.

Minerva.

** 

September 26th, 1990

Change the timetable and I will.

** 

September 26th, 1990

I told you that is impossible. Do not get on my nerves. You are being childish.

** 

September 26th, 1990

I doubt that it is me who is childish here.

Severus.

* * *

November 5th, 1990

How DARE you shout at me like that in front of a student, Severus Snape? It was not only totally inapt, you also set a very bad example in terms of behaviour. What WERE you thinking?

Minerva.

** 

November 5th, 1990

May I remind you that it was you who started shouting? Do not think me stupid, Minerva. Your behaviour was inexcusable and you know it.

Severus.

* * *

December 26th, 1990

I am warning you! Do not challenge me. When it comes to influence at Hogwarts you will lose for certain. If you really wish to extend our disagreement and involve Albus, by all means do. But you are the one who will have to bear the consequences.

Minerva.

** 

December 26th, 1990

Hag.

* * *

**_Diary of Albus Dumbledore, February 13, 1991_**

What has happened to my beautiful Hogwarts? What has happened to the peace and harmony that once roamed our corridors? I am sad. So sad now, that I feel the need to write in here rather than use the common way. The one that is leading me to a dead end - in this case.

It all began when two thoroughly different people tried to build up a life together, in less than twelve months. How could I not have foreseen that this would go so horribly wrong? The time had not come for Minerva and Severus to break with all that had been their life so far, and to enter a completely new area of emotions - and problems.

Severus - not having left Hogwarts ever since he had abandoned the man that had become his guardian. More than a guardian - a father even, more pehaps, than I have ever been - strange as it may seem. Severus, who needed a father more than anything after what his own had done to him, who has been desperate for a home and a family all his life, yet never got one...

Minerva - always capable of keeping a rational eye on things, yet never been lucky enough to experience the warmth and comfort of a family - a proper home - herself... I remember having been startled when she told me she had never left Hogwarts - not even during the summer break at her own time as a student. How can a person be so composed and at the same time so very needing? How much strength do you have to muster, after such a long time on your own, to build up a relationship with Severus Snape?

They pretend I do not know what happens. Pretend nothing had changed. But I know about their past, of course. I see their loathing glances across the staff table. I hear doors banging every now and then. And, of course, I hear the shouting.

Severus does not shout very often. He is an extremely capable Occlumens and does not usually let his feelings overwhelm himself. Nor does Minerva. I have come to know her as a person who, although clearly very emotional in times, does not usually have outbursts like the one that happened around Christmas. She seems... insecure. And unhappy. Just as Severus.

What can an sensitive headmaster, advanced in age but not yet old, do, if a couple of very close friends, his best friends perhaps - and colleagues, cannot seem to understand their emotional life? Interfere? Most certainly not. They will never be able to see their love for each other only because I tell them how blatant it is to me. There are some things people have to discover on their own. Things such as why getting hurt is not always avoidable. That it can happen because love and hatred is so close. Because hatred requires love in the first place...

* * *

April 29th, 1991

Talk?

** 

April 29th, 1991

Yes.

** 

April 29th, 1991

When?

** 

April 29th, 1991

Tonight?

** 

April 29th, 1991

The Three Broomsticks?

** 

April 29th, 1991

I will be there.

** 

Madame Rosmerta's diary, 1 May, 1991

Dear Diary,

I will not comment on last night's events. Just write them down as I perceived them. They will speak for themselves...

At ten to eleven last night, Minerva McGonagall, Deputy Headmistress of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, stepped into my pub, looked around and sat down at the very table she usually takes when meeting someone.

Eleven o'clock sharp: Severus Snape, Potions Master and Minerva's former fiancee, entered, looked around in exactly the same way as she had before, hesitated for a moment, and finally approached the table in a swift walk. So far, so good...

For a long time they were just standing there, staring at each other without a word. Then, after a long while, Snape sat down, looking uncomfortable and tense. Minerva ordered two cans of butterbeer with a mere nod.

'You wanted to talk?' said Snape and she nodded again.

'I think it is about time. How was your day?'

'I am not going to discuss my day with you before we haven't even mentioned our... disagreement,' Snape replied, a most unpleasant sneer playing around his lips. He was eyeing Minerva suspiciously. 'Or are we going to pretend nothing happened - as usual?'

'This leads to a dead end,' Minerva replied sourly. 'You know that very well - ah, thank you, Rosmerta.'

'Well, what did you want to talk about?' growled Snape in an uncharacteristically impatient manner. 'Don't tell me you want an apology.'

'For destroying half my office? Now, don't be ridiculous.' Minerva replied sarcastically, straightening up in her chair. 'I am sure you never intended to.'

A tense silence followed.

'Well,' said Snape after a while and I could see he hated the situation as much as she did, 'actually, I did not. And I am rather sorry about it.'

'You are... rather sorry?' Minerva repeated, looking almost amused. 'Why, that is certainly something. I suppose I am "rather sorry" for hitting you over the head with my broomstick then.'

'Don't worry,' muttered Snape, very consciously rubbing the back of his head. 'Seriously, it doesn't even hurt much.'

Both Professors looked up in surprise at exactly the same time and it seemed, for the split of a second, that they grinned at each other in the old, familiar, completely appreciative way. Then, however, Snape put his face in his hands and Minerva lowered her head, both looking very unhappy and confused.

'What has happened between us, Severus?' said Minerva quietly. 'We used to get along so well.'

'I haven't the faintest idea,' Snape replied, looking, if possible, even less comfortable. "I suppose I just... can't forget what happened last year, and... and how it didn't work out. All our fights and... Well, you know. But there must be a solution. I shall... Perhaps I should not speak to you at all. And I am sure we will be able to avoid each other most of the time.'

'No, no, no!' said Minerva, slamming her hand flat on the table. 'That is not what I have come for! I am trying to lay aside our differences, not to pull the plug on what is left of our communication.'

'But-'

You think it is that simple, do you?' Minerva said harshly. 'Avoiding each other will do the trick you think? Well, I can tell you that it won't. I want much more than that, Severus, and so do you, or you wouldn't be here. I want to be able to talk to you again. Tell you how much I am looking forward to Neville coming to Hogwarts this year. Want to tell you how badly your team played, only to be reminded that my Seeker looks like an apple on a dead twig. And I want to talk to you about your fear of having to teach young Potter - don't even try to deny it, Severus. I know you are mortally afraid of having to face him. And who wouldn't? I want to take part in all that, do you understand? To be a part of your life. I - I want us to be friends again!'

Snape stared at her with some surprise. She seemed slightly exhausted after such a long talk and took a deep gulp of butterbeer before looking at him again. Snape's lips curled.

'Actually,' he said, 'it was you who claimed that he looked like an apple. I merely stated how ridiculous he looked on his broom. And as for the rest,' his voice became just a dash more serious and very quiet, 'all you had to do was ask.' He took a sip of butterbeer himself and eyed her with glittering eyes, still looking as if he was about to smile.

The message took a while to sink in.

When it had, Minerva let out a yelp of pained relief and reached over the table to embrace her colleague, which caused him to blush immensely - or perhaps he was just suffocating. I could not quite make out from the distance.

'Oh Severus,' Minerva sobbed, 'I've been feeling so terrible about all this fighting.'

'Yes,' he muttered, patting her awkwardly on the back as he spoke. 'So have I.'


	6. When Things Proceeded

**_Sixth series of notes: May 91 - July 91_**

May 24th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

Have you noticed Quirrel acting odd lately? When I tried to talk to him this morning, he gave me nothing but a frightened stare and hurried back up the stairs. He has been like that for several months now. Ever since we returned, actually.

Severus.

**

May 25th, 1991

Dear Severus,

Yes, I noticed the same. To be honest, I assumed that I was getting to old to properly talk to younger members of the staff, but if it is the same with you... Albus told me that Ian has met some vampires on his trip to the continent, so that might be the reason he is so jumpy these days. Have you asked him about his turban?

Minerva.

**

May 26th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

Haven't talked to him for a while. As I said, he keeps running away. Wonder if I should take it as a personal insult. The headmaster is back?

Severus.

**

May 26th, 1991

Dear Severus,

Yes, Albus returned last night. You know, some of our colleagues are suspicious about that turban. He never seems to take it off. Personally, I think he is having a fad. Just like you cannot seem to keep your paws off your potions lab every once in a while.

Minerva.

**

May 27th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

Exacly what is that supposed to mean? Are YOU making fun of my habits? Honestly, I seem to remember some of us will buy every Scottish looking handbag within their reach, once they enter Diagon Alley.  
I would appreciate if you would not refer to my hands as paws, by the way. It brings forth unpleasant memories which I would like to shut away these days.

Severus.

**

May 28th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I am truly sorry. Will try to remember. Now you mention it, though, I feel we should have a little chat about certain students who are joining us in a few months time. Don't you agree?

Minerva.

**

May 29th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

No idea whom you are talking about. Though, admittedly, the new generation of first-years is going to be quite interesting in terms of offspring. I hear Lucius's son is joining us?

Severus.

**

May 30th, 1991

Dear Severus,

Yes, I believe he is. Why? Will that be a problem for you? Has Albus mentioned anything? Oh, I still think your job cannot possibly be combined with a teacher's position. Though I am glad to have you here, of course.  
I was talking about Harry Potter, by the way. I feel... oh, it is difficult to explain this in a letter. Can we meet up and talk properly?

Minerva.

**

May 31st, 1991

Dear Minerva,

I am sure your schedule is just as packed as mine with exam preparations. And in any case, I do not see what need there is to discuss Harry Potter. Whatever you have to say, please slip me a note.

Severus.

**

June 1st, 1991

Dear Severus,

You are right, of course. This is a highly busy time. Very well then, I shall take a few moments and try to write down what I am concerned about.  
I know, of course, that your time as a student was not very easy. I also know that you and James never got on very well. That you had many problems with each other. The thing is that - how shall I put it - the circumstances have changed. You are no longer a student. There is not going to be a Sirius Black. And Harry is not James, however much he might look like him. (And he does, I am told.) Hope you see what I mean. The situation is difficult. I am merely trying to help.

See you later, Minerva.

**

June 2nd, 1991

Dear Minerva,

You fear I might confuse Potter's son with him? How thick do you think I am? And I know there is not going to be a Sirius Black again. Let's hope there never will be.

Severus.

**

June 3rd, 1991

Dear Severus,

I do not think you are thick at all. But I know about the problems you have with your past. I have seen you talk to Remus Lupin. But he has grown up, for Merlin's sake. And so have you.

Minerva.

**

June 3rd, 1991

He is still a werewolf.

**

June 3rd, 1991

Dear Severus,

You will excuse if I do not take that remark very seriously. I happen to know that you are generally quite fond of werewolves. You asked me if you could keep one as your pet in your first week at Hogwards. Anyway, all I am asking is that you bear in mind the responsibility you now have. You are a teacher and have a lot of power at hand.

Minerva.

**

June 4th, 1991

I promise not to abuse my powers if you promise not to try and make me like the little brat.

**

June 5th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I think that is a very good idea. And I think I will come off better if Harry happens to be sorted into Slytherin.

Minerva.

**

June 5th, 1991

He won't.

**

June 5th, 1991

You never know. Black was sorted into Gryffindor.

**

June 5th, 1991

I had almost forgotten. In any case, I'll eat my hat if Potter's son doesn't go into Gryffindor, makes friends with the worst bully of their year within their first three days of school, and starts playing Quidditch the moment he lays his hands on a broom.

Severus.

**

June 5th, 1991

Gee, someone is holding a grudge. See you tonight.

* * *

June 19th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

When is the final staff meeting again?

Severus.

**

June 19th, 1991

Three o'clock tomorrow afternoon. When the students have left. Don't forget to bring your concept for the new Quidditch timetable. I am not doing it all by myself again.

Minerva.

**

June 19th, 1991

I won't. Thank you.

Severus.

* * *

July 6th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I am on my way to Romania to get a few days rest before starting on the first-years' letters. Have you been in touch with Albus? He said he wanted to talk to Nicolas about the Philosopher's Stone.  
Seems to think Hogwarts would be a better place of hiding than Gringott's. What do you think? Albus also said, he was going to send you to collect it, which I think is an excellent idea. In case you are going - could I ask you to bring me that biscuit can from W+Ms? You'll find the advert in every recent edition of The Daily Prophet. Thank you so much in advance.

Cheers, Minerva.

**

July 9th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

I have not heard anything about the Philosopher's Stone yet. But I can understand Albus's worries. Will try to get in touch with him as soon as possible.  
Which can, the tartan one?

Severus.

**

July 14th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I have been talking to Albus tonight and he told me he has decided to let Hagrid fetch the stone. Personally, I cannot understand how he can trust Hagrid with something as important as this, but I daresay you will be delighted about some more holiday time. Especially as fetching the stone seems to involve taking young Potter to Diagon Alley to get his equipment. (Thought I'd let you know so that you are not too disappointed.) And don't worry about the biscuit can. I shall buy it in Hogsmeade some time next term, I suppose.  
See you when you return.

Minerva.

* * *

July 22nd, 1991

Dear Severus,

It has been a pleasure talking to you again. We should meet up during the holidays more often. I am sorry I had to leave so soon, but you will understand that the letters cannot wait. I find it unbelievable that there is another seventeen of them left. Since when do we have so many students whose surname begins with P - Z? Slightly stressful this job, I must admit, but a joy nevertheless. I have made it a habit to learn most of the names by heart while writing those letters. Are you successful down there?

Minerva.

**

July 25th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

Am greatly enjoying the Italian weather. Albus could not have chosen a better place for his studies. Though, with all due respect, what he needs me down here for is beyond me. Still, what an excellent country. Think I shall invent a spell to jinx the English rain.  
See you at the first staff meeting of the new term. Possibly earlier.

Severus.


	7. Transcript

**Transcript of the new term's first unscheduled staff meeting**

_Chairwitch: Minerva McGonagall  
Writer: Mandragora Sprout  
Location: private comparment The Three Broomsticks  
Staff members present: Minerva McGonagall, Severus Snape, Mandragora Sprout, Emeric Flitwick and Ian Quirrel_

**Today's topics:**  
1. The Philosopher's Stone;  
2. Misc.

**19:00** First round of butterbeer - Emeric

**19:05** Professor McGonagall informs those present that the headmaster has not yet returned form his trip and wishes her to make a few announcements.

1. The Philosopher's Sone has been transferred to Hogwarts and will be guarded by a three-headed dog.

2. It will also be protected by spells and enchantments.

3. Decision must be made about which spells are to be used.

**19:15** Discussion about spells - staff memebers collect ideas. Result: the only one capable of getting hold of the stone should be Professor Dumbledore. Consequence: need five different categories of spells/enchantments for the barriers. One barrier per teacher.

**19:20** Second round of butterbeer - Mandragora

**19:30** Results of discussion: Sprout - Devil's Snare, Flitwick - locked door and something to do with flying, McGonagall - transfigured chessboard, Snape - fire barrier, Quirrel - dark creature

**19:35** Writer requests to know what the chances are that You-Know-Who returns at all. Professor Snape throws in a rather derisive remark. This is followed by a heated discussion about halluzinations and liabilty.

**19:40** Third round of butterbeer - Ian

The enormously helpful Emeric Flitwick reminds us that whoever tries to get hold of the stone will be stoned before he can use it. Write assures that she is not stoned herself, but merely writes down what is being said, thank you very much, Severus.

**19:50** Discussion whether to sack the writer.

**19:55** Minerva McGonagall demands silence and reminds the staff members that there is work to be done. Writer is asked to re-read today's list of topics.

**20:00** Laughter ends. Fourth round of butterbeer - Severus. Writer assures Professor Snape that she is perfectly capable of handling another pint. Thank you for your concern, my dear.

**20:05** Ian Quirrel would like to know what kind of protection the headmaster himself intends to set up, but is declined an answer.

**20:10** Professor Snape expresses his doubts that the writer's Devil"s Snare will be much of a barrier for a well-trained wizard. Yes it is, you fool. Not everyone has received an "Outstanding" in their Herbology N.E.W.T.s, you know.

**20:12** Professor Snape tries to deprive the writer of the report parchment and is hit over the head with a handbag.

**20:20** Professor McGonagall admonishes her colleagues and asks the writer not to take down every single bit of conversation. Only results. Brief discussion about chessboard follows.

**20:30** Fifth round of butterbeer - Minerva

**20:35** Professors McGonagall and Snape have a discussion about the fire barrier, since an ordinary fire can be overcome by a simple Flame-freezing Spell. Result: it will be a magic fire and something to do with potions.

**20:40** Discussion about Potions being "home-economy" among the wizarding subjects in which Professor Snape refuses to take part.

**20:50** Professor Flitwick suggests that attention should go back to serious topics.

**20:55** Writer expresses her concern that some potions need too long to stew. Professor McGonagall suggests a Potions riddle in form of a poem.

**21:00** Laughing stops. Sixth round of butterbeer - Ian. Laughing continues

**21:05** Professor Snape states that Professor McGonagall would not see him write a poem if her life depended on it.

**21:06** Professor McGonagall replies that, luckily, it does not.

**21:07** Writer is admonished, once again, to only write down the results of discussions. Professor Emerick Flitwick gets hold of the report parchment via 'Accio' and adds paragraph at 21:07

**21:15** Seventh round of butterbeer - Severus

**21:20** Laughter ends.

**21:22** Professor Flitwick suggests to move to the next topic. Writer is unable to note this down due to fit of laughter, so Professor Snape is asked to take over. He refuses and can only be convinced by the Deputy Headmistress threatening to turn him into an umbrella stand. Professor Snape decides to do some research concerning the Restrictions of Intoxication Wizardry.

**21:35** Professors Sprout and Flitwick discuss headmaster's flying abilities and decide that it is rather risky to have him mount a broom to chase after keys. Professor McGonagall asks them not to be ridiculous and reminds them that, according to her knowledge, the headmaster used to play for the Chudley Cannons some hundred years ago.

**21:40** Laughter ends. Writer is asked to cross out this last sentence, but refuses.

**21:45** Report parchment and writing duties return to Professor Mandragora Sprout, as Professor Snape is temporarlily transformed into an umbrella stand.

**21:55** Eighth round of butterbeer - Minerva

**22:00** Meeting is officially over.


	8. When Things Got Potty

**_Seventh series of notes: Sep 91 - Nov 91_**

September 1st, 1991

Dear Severus,

You look hilarious wearing that scowl all day. Care for a butterbeer in The Three Broomsticks tonight?

Minerva.

**

September 1st, 1991

Dear Minerva,

Thank you very much indeed, but I have a lot of preparation left to do. I shall come back to you later this week.

Severus.

* * *

September 6th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I am ever so excited. I had the first lesson with my own first-years today. What an intriguing little group! Mostly average in potential, but certainly charming and quick- minded. One of the girls (I cannot believe I forgot her name again) actually managed to transfigure her match in the course of the lesson. And some of them seem to have made friends already. Thomas and Finnigan, for instance. Or Potter and Weasley. It is so lovely to see the students settle down and get aquainted with the new situation - with their new home - do you not agree? Mind you, some of them will, most probably, turn out to be trouble-makers, but I shall not lose sleep over those things just yet. How was your week?

Minerva.

**

September 6th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

Start of term was quite satisfying. Stressful, though, as usual. Emeric's fifth-years have certainly lost a great deal of their sassiness and are therefore much easier to deal with. I had to put the Weasley twins in detention again, so no improvement there, and Nymphadora Tonks has destroyed no less than three cauldrons on her first day back. I have no idea what to do with the talentless little brat. Apart from that, everything perfect for me. I do not like the sound of your first-years, by the way. Have not had the pleasure of dealing with them yet, but I shall soon. And you can remain almost certain that there will be a pair of troublemakers among them as usual. My money is on Potter and Weasley.

Severus.

**

September 7th, 1991

Dear Severus,

Never expected to ever see your money on a Potter once. But, quite honestly, your feelings might mislead you this time. I find Harry to be very different from James. I fear people might treat him the same irresponsible way, though. He is the one who made You-Know-Who disappear, after all. And there are some of us who seem to feel the need to express their worship about things he would not even be able to remember. Oh Severus, this brings forth all sorts of sentimental feelings. Why did Lily and James have to be murdered? I so wish we could bring them back.

Minerva.

**

September 7th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

I respect your feelings. You had a lot more to do with them in later years and I can even understand why you feel so strongly about them now, having seen Potter's son. The resemblance is frightening. You have to understand, however, that I cannot and will not share your enthusiasm about having James Potter's offspring at Hogwarts. I know you all say he changed after their little 'prank', but, quite frankly, I cannot see it. He was still the same arrogant bastard when jinxing my wand the night before our N.E.W.T. exams, and when he let my graduation papers disappear during the celebration, and he had not changed when I tried to warn him not to use Black as a Secret Keeper. He threw me out of Godric's Hollow, as you might recall. So - do not expect more from me than a certain, polite respect for your feelings on this matter. See you at dinner.

Severus.

**

September 8th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I understand, of course. And I am sorry for trying to talk to you about it in front of Ian and Emeric I should have known you wished to keep this private. How was your first lesson with our first-years?

Minerva.

**

September 9th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

Everything went well. Mind you, there are lots of dunderheads among them as usual, but I might be able to teach them just enough to have them scrape an 'Acceptable' in their OWL at the end of five strenuous years.

Severus.

PS: I find Potter is EXACTLY like his father. No idea how you can have falied to recognize that.

**

September 9th, 1991

Dear Severus,

Let's have a proper talk about the Potter problem some other time. This cannot be discussed via mail. As for the abilities of our new first-years - you must excuse my reservation, but you say that every year. Still, most of your students turn out to be astoundingly good potion-brewers. But what am I doing? You probably wrote that nonsense to trick me into praising your teaching skills.

Minerva.

**

September 9th, 1991

You should not me better than that.

**

September 8th, 1991

I do.

* * *

September 13th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

I have no idea why you have been grinning in such an annoyingly superior way for the last twenty-four hours, but I am sure you will be glad to enlighten me.

Severus.

**

September 13th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I would rather not, thank you very much. Care for a little bet on the outcome of this year's Quidditch final, though?

Sincerely, Minerva.

**

September 14th, 1991

I should have known. So you found a new Seeker, did you? Who is it? Why can he or she not be found on the Quidditch notice board?

Severus.

**

September 14th, 1991

Dear Severus,

Let's say - I would like to reserve HIM as a special surprise. Bet or no bet?

Minerva.

**

September 15th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

There is not going to be a bet before I know why you are so sure you will win this time. Who is it, Wilson? Morris? Don't tell me it's that blasted Middleton. He keeps blowing up cauldrons on purpose.

Severus.

**

September 15th, 1991

Not telling.

**

September 17th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

I bet you tomorrow's bill at Rosmerta's that - whoever it is you found - will be replaced by Potter next year.

Severus.

**

September 18th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I am truly sorry, but for reasons luckily not apparent to you at the moment I shall have to decline. You will understand as soon as the match is over, I promise.

Minerva.

* * *

September 20th, 1991

I cannot believe you are doing this to me.

Severus.

**

September 20th, 1991

What is wrong? What did I do?

Minerva.

**

September 20th, 1991

I was fortunate enough to get a glimpse of a certain someone on a broomstick this afternoon. A someone, who should not be practising Quidditch for another eleven months, if you know what I mean. Trying to gamble my friendship for the blasted Quidditch cup, are you? Witch.

Severus.

**

September 21st, 1991

Dear Severus,

You found out about him already? How disappointing. Yes, I was fortunate enough to have the first-year rule bent. Hope your Seeker is in shape. Because mine certainly is.

Sweet greetings, Minerva.

**

September 21st, 1991

I cannot wait to hear what kind of 'luck' would be needed to bend a rule you set up yourself only two decades ago. Forgotten all about it already, have you? I demand to see you at The Three Broomsticks tonight.

Severus.

**

September 21st, 1991

What a splendid idea. And since I am responsible for yet another attack on your piece of mind, I insist on paying this time. What do you think - shall we invite Albus for a change?

Minerva.

**

September 21st, 1991

Yes, excellent. I shall talk to him later. See you tonight.

Severus.

* * *

October 13th, 1991

Dear Severus,

My congratulations on your promotion.

Minerva.

**

October 13th, 1991

Very funny. Will try to do my best. But I refuse to promise anything.

Severus.

**

October 13th, 1991

I think it is sweet that Albus has asked you to look after young Potter. Proves that he has real faith in you.

Minerva.

**

October 13th, 1991

First, I am not 'looking after' the brat, I am guarding him. Second, I do not need proof of the headmaster's faith, as I am in the lucky position to be perfectly sure of it.

Severus.

* * *

October 31st, 1991

Dear Severus,

I know this is going to sound silly, but do you believe it was the right decision to add points to Gryffindor instead of taking them away tonight? They have been breaking the school rules, after all. Still, I was ever so impressed how they had managed to stay alive. What would you have done in my place? Would appreciate your honest opinion on this.

Minerva.

**

November 1st, 1991

I would have put them in detention.

Severus.

**

November 1st, 1991

Oh dear. Now I feel bad. Detention? Are you serious? Don't you think that is a bit harsh?

**

November 1st, 1991

Dear Minerva,

You must, of course, do what you think is right. And I am yet to see the day when the measures you take fail to serve their purpose. (Apart from a certain incidence involving Potter, Black and some mysteriously vanished essays in our second year, of course.) In this case, I think, it was certainly acceptable to award points. It was a fully grown mountain troll, after all.

Severus.

**

November 1st, 1991

Dear Severus,

Thank you. You don't mean it, but thank you. As for the 'incident' you are referring to - since you will insist, up to the present day, that it was them who let your homework disappear at that time, I am inclined to believe you, of course. However, since there was no evidence for your version of the story but plenty for theirs, you will agree that my decision was, at that time, the only appropriate thing to do.

Minerva.

**

November 1st, 1991

There has NEVER been any evidence for any of 'my versions'. Lupin used to see to that. And apart from his blatant tolerance towards their behaviour, hardly anyone ever wanted to hear the truth anyway. No one ever listened to me.

Severus.

**

November 1st, 1991

That is not true and you know it.

**

November 3rd, 1991

Forget what I said. I know perfectly well that it is not true. Not with you, anyway. You used to listen. You still do. You are still there. I will never forget what you have done for me.

Severus.

* * *

November 8th, 1991

Dear Severus,

Are you alright? You look very distressed these days. And what is wrong with you leg?

Minerva.

**

November 8th, 1991

Don't worry. Everything is in order.

**

November 8th, 1991

Nothing is in order! You have not been talking to me, Albus has not been talking to me, Quirrel looks more frightened than ever, and yet you treat him as if he was You-Know-Who in person. Seriously, I think I have caught the flu, and I am really apprehensive about tomorrow's match, and NO ONE EVER TELLS ME ANYTHING! Goodness, I am sick. Literally.

Minerva.

**

November 8th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

I strongly advise you to soothe yourself. Have a nap and enjoy Gryffindor's remaining time as Quidditch cup aspirants. Your perfect new Seeker is so nervous about the match that he needs to busy himself with supportive literature on the subject. Personally, I would not trust him to catch the Snitch if my life depended on it. Had a lot of fun with him today, though.

Greetings, Severus.

**

November 8th, 1991

I will do you the favour and ask: What happened?

**

November 8th, 1991

Oh, nothing in particular. I caught him with a library book on the school grounds today, planning his next rule-breaking with that Weasley brat. So I... err... felt oblidged to deprive him of his lecture and deduce some points. To make him keep his minds on more important things.

Severus.

**

November 8th, 1991

You know, I can actually SEE you smirk when reading this. Why is is you take such a perverted pleasure in taking points from Harry Potter? I think there is something seriously wrong with that.

Minerva.

**

November 8th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

I do not see it as a perverted pleasure but as means necessary to help Potter deflate his head a bit sooner than his precious father chose to. How about - SEVEN YEARS sooner?

Severus.

**

November 8th, 1991

Thank you. Thank you very much. I admit I had almost given up on you, but you have just given me written evidence that you DO believe James changed after all.

Love, Minerva.

**

November 8th, 1991

I am afraid you misjudge my intentions. You are clearly reading something into my letters that is not there. No need to gather false hope.

Severus.

PS: Word of this to ANYONE and I will make sure you make acquaintance with the bottom of my silver cauldron. You know - the one I use for storing sulphuric acid.

* * *

November 9th, 1991

Dear Severus,

Detailed report on what happened at the Quidditch match, please.

Minerva.

**

November 9th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

I am not entirely sure. I know there was someone jinxing Potter's broom, but it seems impossible to tell who. A member of the staff? Or someone else, wearing an Invisibility Cloak perhaps? If I did not know for certain that he is safely locked behind Azkaban walls, I'd suspect... Anyway, I'll have to do some thinking before I can tell you my assumptions. See you tonight, though. On some 'serious Potter talk', as you like to call it.

Severus.

* * *

November 10th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I am sorry for shouting, but you HAVE to consider people's feelings when talking about the dead. I cannot just forget what happened, you know.

Minerva.

**

November 11th, 1991

Well, I cannot forget what happened either. Have you ANY idea what it is like to enter the dungeons these days and bump into a Potter AGAIN, who is glaring at you, wishing you nothing but ill although you have barely got to know him? Can you even imagine what it is like to look into his eyes and force yourself NOT to go through all defence spells you have ever learned? I don't think you can! I am not blaming you for anything that happened back then, Minerva. You know I never have. But you cannot make me forget. And you will certainly not make me forgive.

Severus.

**

November 12th, 1991

Dear Severus,

You know I have a great deal of respect for your feelings. You can always be sure of that. All I am asking is for you to return this respect and refrain from speaking ill of people I have come to love. It is part of the growing process, you know, to treat people with the same respect you expect from them.

Minerva.

**

November 13th, 1991

Are you saying I am not acting 'grown-up'? Are YOU lecturing me about respect? I have only one thing to say to that, Minerva: "instructive detentions". Good night.

**

November 14th, 1991

Dear Severus,

I cannot believe you bring this up again. I must have told you a thousand times how sorry I am that I so seriously misjudged the situation. And it was not all in vain. You DID get on with Remus for a while.

Minerva.

**

November 14th, 1991

It was 'not all in vain'?!? You made me sit BETWEEN Black and Potter in a deserted classroom for three blasted hours! Have you ANY idea what happened as soon as you had left the room? No, of course you haven't. I never told you. But let me assure you that they were delighted about the unexpected oportunity you gave them. Not much of a detention, if you ask me. But we have been through this. I said I do not blame you, and I'll stick to that. Just don't go saying we might have gained anything from those three hours in hell, because that is a lie.

Severus.

**

November 14th, 1991

Can we meet up, please? I feel terrible.

Minerva.

**

November 14th, 1991

Well, you deserve it. But yes, let's meet in Hogsmeade tonight to lighten things up. I'll pay.

Severus.


	9. When Things Were Catchy

**_Eighth series of notes: Dec 91 - Feb 92_**

December 25th, 1991

_Merry Christmas, Severus!!!_  
Whatever. My answer is still: NO!  
_Please!_  
No way! Not even you are going to get me onto a broomstick again.  
_I promise to never again criticize the way you teach a class._  
Not enough.  
_I will never embarrass you in front of a shop window again when I see a tartan handbag._  
No more frantic screaming in Hogsmeade? Tempting, I must say, but still not enough, though.  
_Hm. I seem to remember the Headmaster talking to Quirrel the other day: "Oh, and if Severus keeps up his spectacular savings, I am not sure I can deny him your job much longer."_  
Meaning...?  
_Well, he was joking, of course, but you know what a great deal of influence SOME of us have on him when he allows it, so you might see this as an offer..._  
Done. But I need a broom.  
_I am sure Madame Hooch will be pleased to lend you one of hers. She seems to have a whole collection of Cleansweeps._  
And I need time to practise.  
_Start tomorrow._  
And if that Potter brat dares laugh I will take fifty points from Slytherin and wallop him with his bloody Nimbus.  
_Don't you mean Gryffindor?_  
Excuse me?  
_Don't you mean you will take fifty points from GRYFFINDOR? You wrote Slytherin._  
Whatever. What is he here for anyway? Shouldn't he be home, celebrating with his blasted family?  
_Severus, he hasn't got a family. Not a proper one, anyway. Now, no more wine for you. You are getting embarrassing._  
Speaking of embarrassment - have you just been kissed by the gamekeeper?  
_Hagrid is his name - I think. Yes, I have, you drunk buffoon._  
Yerks!  
_It is Christmas!_  
So?  
_Severus, you can be horrible sometimes. I was just showing him my new mistle toe. Care to have a look? They make you kiss whether you want it or not. I was lucky enough to obtain it at Zonko's joke shop a few days ago._  
I know those. Stay away from me! Don't you dare get near me with one of them as long as there are students around!  
_Don't worry. I shall wait until we are alone._

* * *

December 26th, 1991

Dear Minerva,

I awoke with a severe headache today and, to be honest, cannot remember a thing we have said or done last night. I would therefore like to apologize for whatever I did to deserve the scratches in my face and would like to remind you that your mistletoe is still hanging in the corner of my bedroom. Would appreciate if you came to collect it soon.

Severus.

**

December 26th, 1991

Dear Severus,

Will come and get it in the afternoon. Unbelievable, though, that you claim to have forgotten all about what happened yesterday. We were both rather drunk, of course, but I recall every second of it. Do you want me to enlighten you?

Minerva.

**

December 26th, 1991

Please do.

**

December 26th, 1991

We broke a certain promise. Then another one, and the last. To make it short - we crossed every single line we had set up for our protection.

Minerva.

**

December 26th, 1991

Oh dear.

**

December 26th, 1991

I thought it was quite enjoyable.

**

December 26th, 1991

I am sure you do. But that does not make it less dangerous.

Severus.

**

December 26th, 1991

I suppose not.

* * *

January 6th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Feeling slightly awkward now the students are back. What do you suggest?

Severus.

**

January 6th, 1992

Dear Severus,

Quite understandable. But we must remain strong under any circumstances. Distract yourself with anything. I have started learning some German, for instance. And I suggest you get your backside on a broom and start practising.

Minerva.

**

January 6th, 1992

I beg your pardon?

**

January 6th, 1992

Oh don't tell me you have even forgotten your promise to referee Potter's next Quidditch match.

**

January 6th, 1992

Nice try. I have never said such a thing.

**

January 7th, 1992

Dear Severus,

You are right, of course. You never said it. You wrote it down. I enclosed our little Christmas chat - it begins right at the bottom of that Christmas card and ends on the green tissue. Happy practice.

Minerva.

**

January 7th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Cannot believe I wrote this. Will stick to my promise of course. Hate you for it.

Severus.

**

January 7th, 1992

With pleasure, darling. Looking forward to seeing you on a broom.

Minerva.

**

January 8th, 1992

No need for that. You know exacly how much I hate flying.

**

January 8th, 1992

Why?

**

January 8th, 1992

I have a wee bit of a problem with heights, remember?

**

January 8th, 1992

No, seriously? You never told me.

**

January 8th, 1992

Probably not. Come to think of it - I never told anyone. Not even the headmaster.

**

January 9th, 1992

Which is certainly the reason he wanted you to referee the match. He would not have suggested it if you had only... Oh, Severus, that is why you kept falling off, was it? Why did you not say so before? We will have to find someone else then.

Minerva.

** January 9th, 1992

I do not usually step back from my promises. And I want that Defence position. I am doing it.

Severus.

**

January 9th, 1992

Well, if you think you can, I would greatly appreciate it. Albus will trust none but you to watch over Potter these days. He seems to consider the situation extremely dangerous. I wonder why... I shall talk to him as soon as possible.

Minerva.

* * *

February 14th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Happy Valentine's Day.

Severus.

**

February 14th, 1992

I shall pin that note to my wall and label it Once-In-A-Lifetime-Experience. You sure have a bad conscience, don't you?

Minerva.

**

February 15th, 1992

Why else would I start to get soggy?

Severus.

**

February 16th, 1992

I like it when you are like that. This mood is very rare with you these days. As, in fact, is any mood apart from consistent grumpiness. What was that shouting on Friday all about?

Minerva.

**

February 16th, 1992

Shouting?

**

February 16th, 1992

I heard voices through your classroom door during lesson time. You seemed very upset about something.

Minerva.

**

February 16th, 1992

Friday afternoon? Oh, I suppose that might have been Longbottom melting his third cauldron in a row. Or perhaps - oh, you might actually have overheard the incident with Potter. He seems extremely touchy these days.

Severus.

**

February 17th, 1992

Care to tell me what happened?

**

February 17th, 1992

Ah, he simply refuses to pay attention. Nothing to worry about. Quidditch is all he has on his mind these days. Like father, like son, I tell you. It is greatly annoying.

Severus.

**

February 17th, 1992

All he has got on his... Severus?! You do know the guidelines for opening people's minds without their knowledge, do you not? It seems you and Albus legilimence pretty much everyone you come across these days. I would be a bit more careful, if I were you. It is classified as Dark Magic, after all.

Minerva.

**

February 18th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Don't be ridiculous. I do not need to break into Potter's mind to see in what spheres his concentration is wandering. He has actually been drawing a little Snitch under his last in-class assignment. I took it away, of course.

Severus.

**

February 19th, 1992

Dear Severus,

I am sorry I ever doubted you. Will think before I write in future. But as I was saying - even Albus seems inclined to break into people's minds quite excessively at the moment. What IS going on at Hogwarts? I feel left out. I also feel I begin to understand where you see the similarities between Harry and James, by the way. It is tiny, seemingly insignificant details that wind you up, is it not? But for whatever reason did you take Harry's essay away? Surely not because he was reminding you of his father?!?

Minerva.

**

February 19th, 1992

He was cheating.

**

February 19th, 1992

While drawing a Snitch?

**

February 19th, 1992

No, before that. I though you said you were going to think before you write?

Severus.

**

February 19th, 1992

Again, my sincerest apologies. What happened?

Minerva.

**

February 19th, 1992

Nothing. A clear fail, of course. But not even that seems to make an impression on him these days.

Severus.

**

February 19th, 1992

I doubt he would show you if it did.

**

February 19th, 1992

I have other sources.

**

February 19th, 1992

Not asking.

**

February 20th, 1992

You know, there are several ways of having an insight in people's thoughts. I do not need to use proper Legilimency to know what the students are thinking. And I know when I am being lied to.

Severus.

**

February 20th, 1992 I know you do.

**

February 20th, 1992

I almost forgot.

* * *

February 21st, 1992

Care for a little bet on the outcome of the Quidditch match tomorrow?

Minerva.

**

February 21st, 1992

I would rather not have another reason to favour Hufflepuff.

Severus.

**

February 21st, 1992

You could put your money on a Gryffindor victory.

Minerva.

**

February 21st, 1992

Over my dead body.

Severus.


	10. When Things Resolved

**_Ninth series of notes: Mar 92 - Jun 92_**

March 20th, 1992

Dear Severus,

Is it true what Albus tels me? How safe is the castle these days? What did he mean by 'special caution'? Surely there is nothing dangerous inside Hogwarts walls intending to steal you know what?

Minerva.

**

March 20th, 1992

Not in writing. Come to my room at the usual time. We shall talk there.

Severus.

* * *

May 17th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Have you completely lost your marbles now? What makes you take so many house points all of a sudden? Not that I mind when you do it to your own students, but what in the name of Merlin did Malfoy lose twenty points for?

Severus.

**

May 17th, 1992

Dear Severus,

I think I am losing control of myself. I cannot take this anymore. If what you told me is true, our students are in great danger. And they have no idea, meaning that they, of course, still roam the corridors at night. As they tend to. You might have received notice that I caught Mr. Malfoy at the bottom of the astronomy tower last night. I was sure he was lying to me when telling me his reasons, but it seems that a couple of mine have indeed been feeding him some garbage about a dragon at Hogwarts. I caught them shortly afterwards. Merlin, I was so upset I did not know how to react. We cannot have them out of bed at night when there is a leak in the security system of the castle. It is simply - not possible.  
Sorry. I feel like falling asleep and never waking up again.

Minerva.

**

May 17th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Quite understandable. Try to relax. Upsetting yourself will not do any good. Which of yours did you catch, by the way? Just curious.

Severus.

**

May 17th, 1992

Dear Severus,

I would rather not give out their names. I do trust you to not pass them on, of course, but it seems not fair towards the students if I tell all the staff.

Minerva.

**

May 17th, 1992

So Potter was among them. Excellent. He starts to prove rather useful in terms of house points.

**

May 17th, 1992

Severus, this is not the time for jokes. There might not be a house cup at the end of the year if we do not find out -

**

May 18th, 1992

Dear Severus,

I fully understand about the seriousness of the situation and I thank you again for your visit. You are a great comfort to me these days. I also agree that writing to each other might prove dangerous. Let us refrain from it for a while. I merely wanted to tell you that - once all this is over - I am going to speak to Albus. About us. We cannot continue like this. Hope you agree.

Love,  
Minerva.

* * *

May 26th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

What immensely foolish person sent Longbottom, Potter and Malfoy into the Forbidden Forest at times like this? I need a full report. Think I have found out a great deal of what is happening at Hogwarts at the moment. Cannot wait to talk to you, but it seems even more dangerous than writing at the moment, so no important information, please. Just a general overview. In case our letters are intercepted.

Severus.

**

May 26th, 1992

Dear Severus,

Judging from what Albus lets through, the Forbidden Forest is one of the safest places available at the moment.  
Especially if Hagrid is there. And there is a reason why I had Granger accompany them, you know. I do think before I give out detentions. ESPECIALLY at times like this. I shall speak to you at the staff meeting.

Minerva.

**

May 26th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

For reasons I shall explain to you as soon as possible I would like to ask you NOT to speak to me at the staff meeting.

Love, Severus.

**

May 26th, 1992

Understood.

* * *

May 30th, 1992

Dear Severus,

Congratulations on the outcome of the Quidditch match. An excellent game, I must say. Shall we meet up and have a little celebration?

Minerva.

**

May 30th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

With pleasure. I shall tell you all the details of the match as usual. I believe there is one player who does not stay in line. We shall have to consider him a real danger regarding the team and the Quidditch cup. For reasons unknown to me I cannot 'guess' what this specific person thinks. Hope you understand my worries. See you in the empty room on the first floor.

Severus.

* * *

June 5th, 1992

Dear Severus,

Full account of events, please.

Minerva.

**

June 5th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

The Headmaster overstepped the mark again. That is all, basically. I cannot believe that man is still alive with that unconcerned attitude towards danger of his. Does he usually take such risks? I hear he has been aware of Quirrel's double-identity for quite some time? Without filling us in? And he actually wanted Potter to follow Quirrel down the trap door? I cannot believe he planned all this. And without letting us know! Taking such a risk just because of a stupid prophecy. That's what all our efforts were for? So that Potter could play hero and - you will not believe how the Headmaster describes it - put his 'speciality' into practise? I should have killed him.  
Dumbledore, I mean.  
Would like to kill Potter, too.  
Am very unpleasant and irate at the moment.  
Do not wish to be disturbed until the end of the year.

Severus.

**

June 7th, 1992

Dear Severus,

Please stop sulking. It is such a wonderful end of the year. Everyone is happy again. No one refuses to talk to me anymore. I feel better than I have in months. Would love to see you at the feast tomorrow. Why did you not come to see yesterday's Quidditch match? Think you would have enjoyed it. Did you even notice you have won the house cup this year?

Minerva.

**

June 7th, 1992

Of course I have. Think I will join the festivities after all. Not that I have the choice. But I need to get the stone matter out of my head. I hear Flamel is preparing to die?

Severus.

**

June 7th, 1992

Dear Severus,

He is indeed. I shall have to visit him soon. Glad you are going to attend the feast. Will ask Mandy to put up the green Slytherin banners early.  
Congratulations, by the way.

Minerva.

**

June 7th, 1992

Could not have done it without you.

Severus.

* * *

June 8th, 1992

Dear Severus,

Please remember to give me your exam results. You will have two very small N.E.W.T.s classes next year if you insist on 'O' as the required O.W.L. grade. If you wish to change that, come and see me immediately so I can inform the students and their parents. WE have three failures in year 5, but no problematic families. Everything seems to work out very smoothly this year.  
I have been talking to Albus about the house cup incident, by the way. I still think it is ridiculous and he should not have done it. If he had only informed me beforehand. But there you go - that is what he is like.  
I have got a lot of work to do at the moment, but I hope to speak to you as soon as the exam results are out.

Love,  
Minerva.

PS: Refrained from mentioning our personal relation to Albus, by the way. I think we managed a very agreeable friendship during the hard times of this year. I suppose we will be able to keep that up.

**

June 8th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

know what you mean, of course. I believe people might even be convinced, if you stopped embracing me in the middle of the staff room as soon as the door shuts behind me. Students are not the only people who talk, you know.  
I shall give you my results tonight. Have nothing against small N.E.W.T.s classes as you should know. 'O' stays the required standard. Anything less is likely to spoil my mood.  
The end-of-term feast was a disaster, of course, but it only proves what I have been saying for years - Gryffindors like to cheat just as much as Slytherins do. Even our unfaultable Headmaster is no exception. You just wait till next year. We will not lose a single Quidditch game and beat you by at least two hundred points in the end.

Greetings,  
Severus.

**

June 8th, 1992

Want a bet on that?

**

June 8th, 1992

To be quite honest - no, I don't. But thanks for asking.

Severus.

* * *

June 20th, 1992

Dear Severus,

Final staff meeting tonight. Cannot wait to start my trip to Edinburgh. I shall visit my parents. Would you like to join me?

Minerva.

**

June 20th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Thank you very much indeed for the invitation, but I do not think I will be able to stand your mother and her tartan obsession for a full two-weeks vacation. Shall go to the North this summer, to visit my cousin Asriel. Looking forward to seeing you tonight.

Severus.


	11. When Things Went Nostalgic

**_Tenth series of notes: Jul 92 - Dec 92_**

July 5th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

I expected you to return tonight, but Severus tells me that you have made up your mind to stay away for another two weeks. I think that is an excellent idea, as I think you could use a bit of time away from school. Please give my love to my dear cousin while you are there. Is her tartan obsession still as bad as it used to be?

Incidentally, I have some good news for you as well. (I told Severus already, but he might not have been in contact with you, now that I am making him do some "work" for me on the Spanish south coast. You know how he never takes any holidays on his own accord.) You might be delighted to hear that our spies have informed us that there have not been any sighting since Voldemort disappeared in the Hogwarts vaults at the end of last term. There is a chance that he has not survived his latest defeat and never returns. We are checking on that, of course, but if this turns out to be true, we will finally be able to take away the immense security precautions we have been forced to keep up for eleven strenuous years now. Students will be able to use the Forbidden Forest again (partly at least), Sixth formers can visit Hogsmeade again at any time, and we will be able to lift the restriction on relationships among the staff. Hope you know what that means for you and Severus.

Enjoy the rest of your holidays.

Albus.

* * *

July 31st, 1992 

Dear Severus,

Sighting near Sevenoaks, East Sussex. Albus gives word that security precautions are to be taken up again.

Love, Minerva.

**

August 3rd, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Understood. Will refrain from marriage proposal just for the moment.

Severus.

**

August 5th, 1992

That was tasteless. If you intend to propose to me, do it properly and without sarcasm.

Minerva.

PS: And don't you dare do it via owl.

**

August 7th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Understood. Will refrain from proposal until coast is clear, sarcasm has come into fashion and you are joining us at Hogwarts again.

Love you, Severus.

**

August 10th, 1992

Dear Severus,

I canot think of anything witty to reply. I am laughing too hard. Will be back soon. Have finished all the first-years' letters within a couple of days. Feel extremely relaxed. Am very much looking forward to seeing you again.

Love, Minerva.

* * *

August 30th, 1992

Dear Severus,

Staff meeting at nine in The Three Broomsticks. Bring Quidditch timetable.

Minerva.

* * *

September 1st, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Sorry for being so grumpy. I had a rather stressful day and now Potter on top of it. I still do not see why I should care whether he lives or dies, but fact remains that he is not making much of an effort. Come to think of it, that is probably the reason why the Headmaster thinks it wise to have him watched.

Severus.

**

September 2nd, 1992

Dear Severus,

No offence taken. Potter's and Weasley's act was unforgivably stupid. I shall have to make their detention as unbearable as possible, make no mistake. Hope you have a good start of the year.

Minerva.

**

September 2nd, 1992

Minerva, correct me if I am wrong, but is that Lockhart fellow anything like you imagined him? He seems nothing but a fool who cannot possibly have accomplished any of the things he claims to have done.

Severus.

**

September 2nd, 1992

Agreed. But I am willing to give him a chance. He might still be a good teacher.

**

September 2nd, 1992

Let's make that a bet. Three Galleons on whether he can fight a simple Cornish pixie. Or teach, for that matter.

Severus.

**

September 2nd, 1992

Done. I shall obtain the pixies, you talk him into doing them in class. Knowing you, that should not be too much of a problem.

Minerva.

**

September 3rd, 1992

You owe me three Galleons.

Severus.

**

September 3rd, 1992

I heard. Cannot believe it. He gave me an excellent idea what kind of detention Potter might like, though. Will pay you tonight.

Minerva.

**

September 4th, 1992

How much do I have to pay YOU until you go and talk to the Headmaster about firing that git and giving the Defence job into competent hands?

Severus.

**

September 4th, 1992

I have been nagging him all summer, Severus. It is no use. He seems to have made up his mind.

Minerva.

**

September 5th, 1992

I should kill him. That would make you Headmistress and solve all my problems at once.

Severus.

**

September 6th, 1992

Don't be ridiculous, Severus. One does not joke about such things. And incidentally, what makes you so sure I would let you teach Defence?

Minerva.

**

September 6th, 1992

You are not with me in this?

**

September 6th, 1992

Let's just say I see the reason why Albus would want to keep you away from the Dark Arts. I am sorry, Severus, but it is like having an alcoholic work in a pub. I trust your strength, of course, but you must admit that you have always been fascinated by dark magic and curses of all sorts.

Minerva.

**

September 6th, 1992

Oh, those flattering schoolboy images one never gets rid of. You should know me, Minerva. You should know my true reasons for changing sides in the first place. I never used a curse when I could help it. Not even back in my days as a student. I was DEFENDING myself in ninety-nine percent of the cases, remember?

Severus.

**

September 7th, 1992

You keep saying so, yes...

**

September 7th, 1992

Do you still doubt me?

**

September 7th, 1992

Let's just say I know that your perspective is slightly... prejudiced. And you hold grudges longer than any person I have ever met.

Minerva.

** 

September 8th, 1992

Transcript of the year's second staff-  
_I shall kill you before the staff meeting is over, Minerva McGonagall._  
I strongly advise you to refrain from it. Mind your blood pressure. Why, though?   
_So you doubt me, do you? You still believe them. You are probably still convinced that it was me who blew up your desk during our first week at school, just because we had not covered that spell yet. You believe everything they have been feeding you for years without questioning it even now one is dead and the other as good as. Did you actually believe that I knew more curses than anyone else when I entered Hogwarts? And here is me thinking you were on my side._  
I am!   
_You are not, if you fail to realize who used to be the victim. Can you not see that Potter and Black were in league against me from the beginning?_  
They were constantly at each other's throats! James hated Sirius almost as much as you hated each other. How could they have been in league against you? You will have to admit that this sounds just slightly far-fetched. You still claim that it was not you who liquidized Sirius's hand?   
_Yes._  
So he did it himself, did he?   
_Yes._  
I find that unbelievable.   
_See? You are still refusing to see the blatant truth. Just because you have taken a liking to pompous Potter and blasted Black. You do know what Black was imprisoned for, do you not? Now put two and two together. Who has been right about them all along?_  
I am not discussing this.   
_I should have known. It is not in the nature of a Gryffindor to admit mistakes of such grave nature, I take it._  
Severus Snape, watch your mouth!   
_Stop treating me like a student!_  
Well, you are not acting very grown-up at the moment.   
_Do you deny that Black betrayed our side? Do you deny that I was right in doubting his motives? Are you still saying it was MY fault to follow Lupin into the Shrieking Shack?_  
Well... partly, yes.   
_Black tried to murder me!_  
You fail, as usual, to realize that there are always to sides in a fight, Severus. I do not deny that what Potter and Black did in your sixth years was stupid and dangerous, but the decision to enter the tunnel without knowing what would await you at the end, well aware that it could not have been any of your business, was your very own.   
...

* * *

October 31st, 1992

You really think it could not possibly have been a student, Severus?

Minerva.

**

October 31st, 1992

Dear Minerva,

I am not saying none of them could have done it, but I doubt any of mine would have the guts to do such a thing. And they are the main suspects here. Potter and his friends just happened to be there, I am sure of it. They don't know anything - except for the thing Potter is hiding from us, of course.

Severus.

**

November 1st, 1992

Dear Severus,

Excuse my curiosity, but how can you be so sure he is hiding something?

Minerva.

**

November 1st, 1992

You really need an answer to that?

**

November 1st, 1992

I am not sure if I understand you correctly. You think he is not telling us something? But what? And do you have any evidence? Have you SEEN what he is hiding?

Minerva.

**

November 1st, 1992

Of course not. The boy is a bloody natural Occlumens. Did you not know? Why do you think the Headmaster declared him "innocent until proven guilty"? He could not see anything either.

Severus.

**

November 1st, 1992

I had no idea. Just as I keep saying - no one ever tells me anything. Just because I did not bother learning Legilimency does not mean I am not interested in what is happening around me.   
You know, I think it could actually be helpful if the boy is able to close his mind from external penetration. You remember Albus mentioning his link with You-Know-Who?

Minerva.

**

November 1st, 1992

Dear Minerva,

Do not be too happy about that. Natural Occlumenses close their mind unintentionally and only when they feel the need of hiding something. It is much harder teaching them to do it properly than teaching anyone else to do it at all.   
Should there ever be any trouble concerning Potter's connection with the Dark Lord, I will be the last to volunteer for the teaching job, you can be sure of that.

Severus.

**

November 1st, 1992

Dear Severus,

If my infallible knowledge of human nature is not taking me on a ride here, you would not volunteer for teaching a Potter if your life depended on it, one way or the other.

Minerva.

**

November 1st, 1992

Dear Minerva,

My compliments to your excellent ability of judgement. Has Filch been to see you, by the way? He was going to get rid of the writing, but seemed to have severe difficulties with it.

Severus.

**

November 1st, 1992

Dear Severus,

No, I have not seen him. Perhaps he found a solution. I shall check on that later. Wanted to tell you how glad I am that we are on writing terms again, by the way. Have you stopped sulking about your past?

Minerva.

**

November 1st, 1992

I never sulk.

**

November 1st, 1992

No, you merely take extraordinarily long periods of thinking.

**

November 1st, 1992

Very funny. If you must know - I do not consider sulking a very worthwhile activity. Especially not in your case.

Severus.

**

November 1st, 1992

Because you know it is not worth the effort? Since I will not crack down and apologize as people usually do when you are angry with them?

**

November 1st, 1992

Pretty much.

**

November 1st, 1992

That is just as well, because there is no reason for me to apologize.

**

November 1st, 1992

I know.

* * *

November 2nd, 1992

Dear Severus,

The bloody message causes great difficulties. Could we not just put some Vanishing Draught onto the walls?

Minerva.

**

November 2nd, 1992

I'd like to see you try that. Ever seen a corridor collapse? Incidentally, did you just swear in written form?

**

November 2nd, 1992

I was merely commenting on the form of the message. It IS written in blood, is it not? Stop being sarcastic and provide a bit of help for a change. What do you suggest?

Minerva.

**

November 2nd, 1992

Will come down for lunch in a minute and have a look. Have you finished teaching?

**

November 2nd, 1992

No. Third years at half past four and sixth- years in the evening. Tuesday is my busy day. How about you? A little pre-match celebration in The Three Broomsticks tonight?

Minerva.

**

November 2nd, 1992

Excellent idea. Had completely forgotten about the Quidditch match on Saturday. See you in a bit.

Severus.

* * *

November 7th, 1992

Morning. Will you come and watch us flattening you today?

Minerva.

**

November 7th, 1992

What is the point in making that blasted owl wake me up at seven in the morning when the game is not until eleven o'clock? Witch. Now I am awake. Shall we have some breakfast in the Great Hall?

Severus.

**

November 7th, 1992

I will come down in a couple of minutes. Just quick-drying my hair and getting dressed myself. Wait for me at the breakfast table.

Minerva.

**

November 8th, 1992

Dear Severus,

You owe me a bottle of Sherry. Cannot believe you still refuse to see that with Potter in our team we cannot possibly lose. Oh, and incidentally, what did you think of Gilderoy's little mishap today? Worthy of an experienced traveller and warrior against the world's dark forces?

Minerva.

**

November 8th, 1992

Why do you think I insisted on the Sherry? I do not have enough Galleons left to gamble. I shall mix the Sherry by myself, make no mistake. Cannot affort to buy any at the moment.  
You are talking about the de-boning, I take it? We should throw that man out of the castle if the Headmaster does not fire him anyway.  
See you tonight. Or - probably not. I am patrolling the North tower at the moment. Have the slight suspicion that Dumbledore wants to keep me out of this. Ridiculous, but I shall obey his wishes, of course.

Severus.

* * *

November 9th, 1992

Bought a talisman yet?

**

November 9th, 1992

Severus, your sarcasm is completely out of place in this situation. Our students are being attacked. Stop playing stupid! I need your supposrt. Otherwise I... I do not think I will stand through this.

Minerva.

**

November 9th, 1992

What would you be worried about? This "monster", or whatever it is, seems to be highly selective about its victims. No pureblood has been attacked yet.

Severus.

**

November 11th, 1992

Dear Minerva,

I am sorry. My remark was inapt and tasteless.

Severus.

**

November 11th, 1992

And moreover, it was extremely dangerous. You DO know they are saying this is Salazar Slytherin's monster, do you not?

Minerva.

**

November 11th, 1992

Yes, I do. What is your point?

**

November 11th, 1992

Well, some of us do bear the unfortunate duty of being Head of Slytherin these days. People are taking you for a dark wiyard already. Do you have to keep pretending all this does not have any effect on you whatsoever?

Minerva.

**

November 11th, 1992

My job requires this sort of reputation, as you should very well know. And apart from that - I AM a dark wizard. 

Severus.

**

November 11th, 1992

Yes, I see a serious Black in you.

**

November 11th, 1992

Now, THAT was tasteless.

**

November 11th, 1992

I am sorry.

* * *

December 3rd, 1992

Staff meeting at seven. Headmaster's office.

Minerva.

* * *

December 23rd, 1992

Severus, did YOU choose that new password for the Slytherin commonroom? This is not witty, laddie. I find it disgusting.

Minerva.

**

December 23rd, 1992

I did indeed. As usual. Do not know what you are talking about. One has to maintain a wee bit of humour in times like this.

Severus.

**

December 23rd, 1992

Since even the passwords to the commons have an educational effect on the students, I would like you to avoid jokes of this kind. ESPECIALLY in times like this.

Minerva.

**

December 23rd, 1992

Understood. Will refrain from humour in future.

Severus.


	12. When Things Slithered Along

**_Eleventh series of notes: Jan 93 - Mar 93_**

January 15th, 1993

I. Hate. Gilderoy. Lockhart.

Minerva.

** 

January 15th, 1993

What has he done this time?

** 

January 15th, 1993

Nothing. I just felt the need of sharing my feelings.

Minerva.

** 

January 15th, 1993

I am all with you. Want a hand in disposing of the git? I have been storing a highly effective, untraceable poison ever since he set foot in this castle. We could get away with it, you know.

Severus.

** 

January 15th, 1993

For the first time in my life I am seriously tempted to accept this offer.

Minerva.

** 

January 15th, 1993

You cannot be serious. Right ... what has he done to you?

Severus.

** 

January 16th, 1993

Oh, nothing in particular, I assure you. I had a long conversation with him yesterday after lunch in which he kindly let me know what an incompetent Head of House I am and how much I could gain from taking some private flying lessons. With him.  
I assured him that I needed nothing of that sort, having played Quidditch for over sixty years now in what I consider to be a rather successful way, but he just... he will never even listen. Told me that, with sufficient practice, I might even manage to look a little less ridiculous on a broom one day. If I was planning to follow his advice, that is. And if I stopped wearing my thoroughly unattractive tartan robes.  
I told him to please stop making such personal remarks, but he simply went on for ages. There is just no accoustic way of getting into that man's skull. And I doubt Albus will authorize less subtle ways, such as axes or drills. Mind you, he is too busy these days anyway, to get involved in such matters.  
I am so fed up I could cry.

Minerva.

** 

January 16th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I have a lot to say, so I am sending this via owl rather than pinning it up your door. And you might want to keep this letter, as it will be the only written piece of evidence I shall ever give for despising a person more than... say... James Potter.  
First of all, Gilderoy Lockhart is an arrogant, talentless, inconsiderate, self-righteous little brat with NO apparent skills and absolutely no right to judge other people. Let alone competence. None whatsoever, understood? What he says to you (or anyone else, for that matter) should just float by us like a Seeker that has been knocked out by one or two Bludgers, because it is simply the junk that comes out of one's mouth when one has been fed crap for too long. (Such as that one is a shining celebrity and a cut above the rest of humanity.)  
Second, the last person to be affected by this sort of garbage should be you. Just take a moment and please consider this in a logical way. He is twenty-eight, you are seventy-three. Who is likely to be more intelligent, the better witch, more sensible, better behaved, the more competent teacher, the better flyer...  
Oh, and incidentally, I am not sure whether you appreciate my opinion on this, as, of course, I have never been much of a flyer myself, but I have seen you do it and I can assure you most people will have difficulties with dives like that. In addition, you have not only been able to persuade me to mount a broom again after twenty years in which I have consequently been avoiding just that, you even managed to reduce my fear of heights to a minimum so that I felt ready to referee a blasted Quidditch match. For the first time since I can remember, I have not been sick after a flying lesson or, indeed, after leaving the blasted Quidditch pitch. Do you honestly believe an incompetent idiot like Lockhart could have achieved such a thing? For my part, I strongly doubt it.  
I want you to lay back and go through every single time, in which we sat together and talked about the reasons why Gilderoy Lockhart is an incompetent idiot again. You will soon realize how foolish it is to waste even one thought on whether any of his statements should be considered valuable for our further lives. You really should not pay attention to him. (Unless, of course, the Headmaster changes his opinion about the authorization of axes. I would gladly give you a hand, by the way, if that happy moment came to pass.)

Severus.

PS: I like your tartan robes.

** 

January 17th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I am sitting here and crying. Seriously, your letter means so much to me. The whole situation was so ridiculous. I could slap myself for letting that remark take control over my feelings. Thank you for being there. Thank you for putting down your feelings on a piece of parchment (I know you rather avoid this) to make me feel better. It is helping me to see reason. And it helps me to reflect on the situation. You are right, of course. In every single point. Think I feel better already.

Love,  
Minerva.

** 

January 18th, 1993

Dear Severus,

Very surprisingly, Gilderoy visited me this evening to apologize for his rudeness. He did not seem to actually realize what he was apologizing for, though. Rather like someone had talked him into it. Had told him that he had gone too far. Do you have any... thoughts on that matter?

Minerva.

** 

January 18th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

Glad to hear about the apology. No, no thoughts.

Severus.

** 

January 18th, 1993

Severus??

** 

January 18th, 1993

I have no idea what gives you the impression I might have talked to that bastard. Why should I bother? It is your life. Your quarrel. I have nothing to do with it.

Severus.

** 

January 18th, 1993

Thank you.

** 

January 18th, 1993

Your welcome.

* * *

January 29th, 1993

Yes, I know the Headmaster objected to Malfoy's request of banning all Muggleborns from voting in the Ministry, but do you honestly suggest I should have joined the conversation? Are you forgetting what kind of job I am bound to?  
There was no need to shout at me like that, and you could at least have given me the opportunity of defending my point of view.

Severus.

** 

January 30th, 1993

I am sick and tired of your point of view, Severus Snape. You excuse everything, I repeat: EVERYTHING you do with your exceedingly important top-secret position. As if You-Know-Who was constantly breathing down your neck. Could you not see last night that I really needed your support? They almost got their majority, after all. Can you imagine that? In times like this?  
I am sorry I slammed the door into your face, but I was just too tired to hear any more of that pureblood crap. I needed some time on my own.

Minerva.

** 

January 30th, 1993

Let me put it like this... they DO have a point. Or would you feel safe if the wizarding community was run by a handful of incompetent half-bloods - or Muggleborns even? In cooperation with Muggles? There are some very creepy ideas out there, Minerva.

Severus.

** 

January 31st, 1993

I do not have the nerve for this rubbish right now. Not at times when the school seems to be undermined by ominous monsters. Apparently deriving from YOUR house, if I might add. You think half-bloods are creepy? Why, I had not realised that setting a Sphinx lose at them would provide so much of an improvement of the situation. Well done, Severus.

** 

January 31st, 1993

Are you suggesting I am the heir of Slytherin? How amusing. And why in the name of Merlin do you think this is a Spinx?

** 

February 1st, 1993

Albus's latest theory. Don't ask. I think he was joking, but the mere thought drives the sweat to my face. What if we do have a Sphinx in here? Or something worse? Something that cannot be traced? What if we have a Basilisk?

Minerva.

** 

February 1st, 1993

Don't be ridiculous. A beast the size of a Sphinx or a Basilisk could not roam the corridors without being seen. No, it must be something else. Something... more subtle.

Severus.

** 

February 1st, 1993

Like a Letifold?

** 

February 1st, 1993

Of course. A re-educated Letifold who stuns people instead of having them for lunch. How exceedingly probable.  
Incidentally, is it true what Lockhart tells me, that you and Mandy have opened a secret G.L. Fanclub and are trying to recruit members?

Severus.

** 

February 1st, 1993

He told you WHAT? Has he gone mad? Have YOU gone mad? Oooh, I am going to roast that man. I shall drown him in his own lilac foam bath. He shall never live a peaceful life again once I am through with him. Grrr.

** 

February 2nd, 1993

An excellent suggestion. I expect I have mentioned this highly effective poison I have in store...  
Anyway, have a nice rest of the week. 

Severus.

* * *

February 14th, 1993

Hand me that poison. Now.

Minerva.

** 

February 14th, 1993

It went into his pumpkin juice first thing at dinner.

Severus.

** 

February 14th, 1993

What??

** 

February 14th, 1993

Relax. Do I look like a murderer to you?

** 

February 14th, 1993

Well, as a matter of fact...

** 

February 14th, 1993

Not a word.

* * *

March 12th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I met Remus Lupin in the pub tonight and we came to talk about vaguely important matters of your school life. Admittedly, this has been something of a shock to me, which is why I mention it to you in this letter, rather than talking to you in person.  
First of all, how come you never told me that you mastered Legilimency at such an early age? I always assumed you did not learn it until seventh year. This is truly impressing. Second - I had almost completely forgotten about this matter, but Remus tells me that you had indeed been locked in a broom cupboard the night I caught you out of bounds - back in your second year. Magically locked? To open at midnight? Why did you not tell me so? And what is that matter about Sirius Black and his racing broom? Remus kept avoiding that subject.  
I thought I knew everything that has happened back there, but apparently I have been wrong.  
Please help me understand this.

Minerva.

** 

March 13th, 1993

It is not important.

** 

March 13th, 1993

Yes, it is, Severus. I am, to speak quite frankly, deeply disturbed about the matter. It was me who taught you, after all. Me who caught you out of bounds in nintey percent of the cases. It was me who has been teaching you lot for seven years and never noticed your fear of heights - which is bad enough in itself, but did they really lock you up in the Astronomy tower over night? Several nights? If that is the case, quite frankly speaking, I can see how a monster can freely wander our school corridors nowadays. If this tells anything about the school's security standards. This is outraging. It cannot be. If despite my nightly patrolling I never noticed you up there, how am I supposed to notice a Basilisk sneaking up on me from behind the back?  
I am very puzzled. And very worried. Would you please answer properly? This is really important to me, as it affects my competence as a teacher.

Minerva.

** 

March 14th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

It is not your fault. It has never been. I have told you that, and I am not saying this because I consider you my friend now, but because it is the truth. You have always done your best to remain fair.  
Yes, I spent - one or the other night up in the Astronomy tower, but I never made a sound, so you WOULDN'T have noticed. Naturally I took care to not be seen, as you would have put me in detention if you had, would you not?  
The racing broom incident was rather uncomfortable, I admit, but I got over it and no real harm was done. It was not even up to you to supervise us at that time. Please do not worry about old and long forgotten matters.  
And yes, I started busying myself with the beginnings of Legilimency at the age of fourteen, but I have not been able to do it properly until seventh year, or even later. Occlumency, of course, is much easier and was not much of a problem. Even Lupin, Potter and Black have been able to master it during their intensive Defence courses in sixth year. Much to my surprise, obviously, when I found I could not break into their minds any longer, to see what they were up to. Incidentally, that was also the year when they started sneaking up on me in corridors. But we have been through this. You do not believe me and I appreciate that opinion.

Sincerely,  
Severus. ** 

March 14th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I owe you an explanation. And an apology.  
I have been talking to Remus about the sneaking-up matter as well, you know. And he - confirmed your version, basically. With all sincerity and an extremely guilty look on his face. Now, I know I shoud have asked him years ago and it is not really an excuse if I tell you that I was simply... convinced you were holding on to some stupid tale which you had just happened to come up with at that time, but I would like to tell you how sorry I am for not believing you. The thing is, as a teacher you sometimes have to decide what to believe and what explanation to dismiss as lies. The problem being that James's or Black's version was practically always supported by Remus and little Pettigrew, making this a four against one situation. Clearly I have been mistaken and should have investigated one or the other matter further, but I failed to do so and cannot change that now. I am sorry.

Minerva.

** 

March 14th, 1993

Don't be. It is not important.

** 

March 18th, 1993

For what reason were you meeting up, by the way?

** 

March 19th, 1993

Dear Severus,

Where have you been last night? I have been trying to get hold of you all evening.  
Anyway, you are referring to Remus Lupin, I presume? I was meeting up with him to discuss his future. (I do not think he will object if I tell you.) He has had a lot of problems lately, due to his... unusual condition. No employer is willing to take him in these days. It is all part of the pureblood discussion, of course. So-called half-breeds are seen down upon just as half-bloods and Muggleborns, of course. So that means he is out of job, encumbered with debts and rather lonely these days. I cannot understand people's views on that, believe me. He would naturally take a day off once a month and not come to work. Hm... unless, of course... oooh, if THAT is the sole reason for not hiring him, I shall have a word with the Minister for Magic. Or... oh, I have just thought of another option. I need to go, Severus. See you later.

Minerva.

** 

March 23rd, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I would like to apologize for being so dismissive last night. I do appreciate your opinion and I do realize that you and Lupin have come to be very good friends. However, I am sorry to say that I am also in possession of an opinion which I would like to see respected. And I will never get along with Lupin, no matter what you say and how much you protect him. Please do not keep confronting me with his situation. Because, quite honestly, I do not care.

Severus.

** 

March 23rd, 1993

Sad, Severus. Very sad. Because I have been thinking how nice it might be if Remus joined the Hogwarts staff next year. I hoped to gain your support for that, as some of the others still seems a bit reluctant about it. Argus keeps telling me he might savage the grounds, which I think is a ridiculous idea. I do not know what is wrong with them all of a sudden. People seem to have gone mad over the pureblood matter. I really need some sense from my best friend around here, do you realize that?

Minerva.

** 

March 23rd, 1993

If Lupin joins the Hogwarts staff, I shall take my leave.

Severus.

** 

March 23rd, 1993

Oh, don't be ridiculous, Severus. You keep saying that you will leave because of this and that, and yet - you never do. Have you even read my letter? I said I need some SENSE.

Minerva.

** 

March 23rd, 1993

Please do not do this to me, Minerva.

** 

March 23rd, 1993

What can be so exceedingly bad about it? He will be safe in the Shrieking Shack. You know that very well. I find Remus is a very sweet person and deserves a chance. And you will not be able to change my mind in this matter.

Minerva.

** 

March 23rd, 1993

It is not that. But... well, do as you please. You will see what comes out of it.

Severus.

** 

March 23rd, 1993

What is is, Severus? Do try to explain. I really wish I could understand your point of view. Why you object so strongly. Please give me a chance.

Minerva.

** 

March 24th, 1993

I merely doubt I can stand having Potter AND Lupin around me again. That is all.

Severus.

** 

March 24th, 1993

Severus Snape!  
James Potter is dead. He died defending perhaps the only useful weapon we will ever have against You-Know-Who, in case he ever returns. This weapon HAPPENS to be around and look just a little bit like him, yes. But Harry is a COMPLETELY different person. You have GOT to see that.  
Remus Lupin is a grown-up person, just like yourself, and has changed in many ways since then. I am sure you two would get along if only you would give it a try. But you are as stubborn as... oooh, I have not seen this kind of foolishness ever since Black went into Azkaban. I am not willing to let you brood over your past for the rest of your life, Severus. I shall talk to the Headmaster tonight.

Minerva.


	13. When Things Became Animagical

**_Twelfth series of notes: Apr 93 - Jul 93_**

April 6th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I have received word that you will be taking part in the International Teachers' Competition for Advanced Broom Racing this easter. I would like to wish you the best of luck. Please fly safely and make sure you kick Daedalus Diggle from me, in case you meet him somewhere.

Severus.

**

April 6th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I will most certainly meet Daedalus Diggle, as he is going to be one of the seven judges this year. Incidentally, I would like to invite you to join me. I am sure the whole event will be highly worthwhile, and you would even get to fly with me on my broomstick, as it is tradition that the contestants arrive on their racing brooms.

Minerva.

**

April 6th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I thank you very much indeed for the invitation, but I am afraid I shall have to decline. There is too much work left for me, concerning the upcoming exams. The general Potions ingredients store has to be refilled, and I do believe the Dungeons could use some tapestry. My, my, and only one weekend time for all that.

Severus.

**

April 6th, 1993

Dear Severus,

The exams are not until June, I clearly recall you stocking up on Potions ingredients last month, and I am not even going to comment on the tapestry. What is wrong with you? If you would rather not join me, you could just say so. I shall ask someone else, then. Someone who appreciates my presence and who takes some interest in my personal life. How about - Remus Lupin?

Minerva.

* * *

April 21st, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I would like to apologize. I did not mean to insult you. Seriously, I... would have loved to join you, but fact remains that such things are just... not possible for me.

Severus.

**

April 21st, 1993

Severus? Is is safe to assume that you merely feared mounting a broom again? Are you still scared?

**

April 21st, 1993

What, me, traitor and spy, Auror-to-be and Ex-member of the Dark Lord's Inner Circle - afraid of mounting a mere racing broom? Most certainly not. Do not be ridiculous.

Severus.

**

April 21st, 1993

I thought you said your training last year had been sufficient to diminish your fear of heights once and for all?

Minerva.

**

April 21st, 1993

I am NOT afraid of heights! I merely have... a distinct problem with racing brooms. That is all. Besides, who wouldn't? No person of their right mind would mount that... that thing you flew at the race. Congratulations on winning, by the way.

Severus.

**

April 21st, 1993

Why, thank you very much indeed. But even if I am not of my right mind - I seem to think you should do something about this phobia of yours. Do you want me to give you some lessons again?

Minerva.

**

April 21st, 1993

It is not a phobia! I call it healthy opposition against life-threatening situations. And no, you will not see me in a blasted flying lesson again as long as I can still stand and fight. That is my final word.

Severus.

**

April 21st, 1993

It is, of course, your choice.

Minerva.

* * *

April 29th, 1993

I hear you are meeting the werewolf tonight?

**

April 29th, 1993

I most certainly am.

**

April 29th, 1993

Enjoy yourself then.

**

April 29th, 1993

I most certainly shall.

* * *

May 8th, 1993

Dear Severus,

Unscheduled meeting at eight o'clock sharp, in my office. There has been another attack. A double-attack. Albus has left. I have no idea what to do.

Minerva.

**

May 8th, 1993

The Headmaster is gone? How did that happen? What are you planning to tell the staff?

Severus.

**

May 8th, 1993

Why, the truth, of course. If we do not find the culprit, the school will be closed.

Minerva.

**

May 8th, 1993

That is ridiculous! We WILL find them. Hogwarts cannot be closed. They cannot just get rid of Dumbledore.

Severus.

**

May 8th, 1993

They just have! Sorry. I know how you feel about this matter. And I feel the same, in fact. Hogwarts has been my home for thirty-six years now. Longer, if you count my own time as a student. I... cannot just stand and watch it going to the dogs. We have to do something, Severus.

**

May 8th, 1993

What do you suggest?

**

May 8th, 1993

How about another raid of the Slytherin dormitories? I have also started to research on Salazar's ancestory in the library, but those books are just not worth anything when it comes to really important matters. And Albus has not been a great help either - so far. Always heading off to the Ministry exactly when we need him most. And now he is gone. I feel... oh, I feel the responsibility in every vein of my body. It is almost too much to bear.

Minerva.

**

May 8th, 1993

Do not worry. We shall trace the culprit and finish him off together.

* * *

June 1st, 1993

You look thoroughly grumpy.  
_So?_  
It is over! You should be celebrating.  
_I am merely in a bad mood._  
Because you have not had any liquorice for twenty-four hours?  
_I. Am. NOT. Addicted. To. Liquorice._  
No, really?  
_No, really! If you must know, I think the headmaster is being irresponsible again. What need was there to cancel the exams?_  
You know what Albus is like.  
_Unfortunately, yes. Anyway, any plans for the holidays yet?_  
Not too many. Remus invited me over. I think I shall go and see how he copes with his life. Care to join me?  
_No._  
Oh, don't be ridiculous, Severus. I think it is time you two lay your differences aside.  
_For what reason? He will not be joining us after all, will he?_  
Sadly, no. It is too risky. He declined the Headmaster's offer. I still find his worries ridiculous, but what can you do...?  
_You would really like to see him here, would you not?_  
I would, indeed. I care for my students - and ex-students, Severus. As you should know. You of all people.  
_I do._

* * *

June 28th, 1993

Dear Severus,

How are you? I am greatly enjoying my trip to East-Sussex, visiting Mandy on my way home, and Remus, of course, who has been asking for me to come over twice during the last two weeks. I think that is very sweet of him. How are your holidays this year? I hear you decided to stay at Hogwarts for a change?

Minerva.

**

July 1st, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I have decided not to go abroad, that is true. I find this very relaxing, as it gives me an opportunity to continue my research on Antidotes. The dungeons are refreshingly cold, unlike blasted Italy or horrible Spain where the sun drains you to the root, twenty-four hours a day. With regard to everything else, no changes worth mentioning have occured in this part of the country.

Miss you, Severus.

**

July 4th, 1993

Dear Severus,

Unbelievable though it may seem, Remus will, after all, join the Hogwarts staff as a replacement for our friend Gilderoy. You will not imagine what has happened, though. When I went to see him earlier this week, Remus told me that, due to recent inventions in potion-brewing he is going to be safe during "his time" every month from now on. I almost did not belive my ears. How is that possible, you might wonder. Well, as it seems, some apparently rather strange witch or wizard has spent a great deal of private time inventing a potion that helps werewolves keep their senses during full-moon. I do not know what it does exactly, but it certainly works. I have been blessed with a first-hand experience. Now, I know you are not going to be very happy about the course things have taken, but I would like to ask you to gather yourself and take this as an opportunity to finally lay old differences aside. You are both grown up people and should be able to overcome old and stupid childhood rivalries. I have told him the same, by the way. Anyway, see you in a few weeks' time.

Minerva.

* * *

July 11th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I have made up my mind to return to Hogwarts for the moment. Thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts on the matter. Admittedly, I am not much of a floo person, but occurrences like this... well, you know. Sticking your head into another person's fireplace is uncomfortable, but can be necessary. Though I personally prefer talking to you in person. To be quite honest, I still have problems believing that he really did escape. I mean - it is not supposed to be possible, is it? Never in my life would I have believed anyone capable of fighting off those Dementors. (I know you hate them as well, so do not even try to pretend.) Anyway, I have been to visit Remus and he, too, seems very startled about the matter. I think it is especially difficult for him to have his former best friend on the run from the Ministry, considering that he is the only one who is still alive. What a horrible situation this must be. Anyway, hope to catch you when I arrive tomorrow morning. You are still working on your potions, I trust?

Minerva.

**

July 12th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

It was a pleasure talking to you again tonight. Good to have you around once more.

Severus.


	14. When Things Stumbled

**_Thirteenth series of notes: Jul 93 - Sep 93_**

July 24th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

Problems near the French south border. Will be away for a couple of days. No time to talk to you in person.

See you,

Severus.

**

July 29th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I cannot believe they still have not sorted out their problems at the Ministry. Albus decided to give in their pressure and allow the positioning of Dementors at the Hogwarts gates. He is extremely displeased about it, though. But who would not?

I need to talk to you urgently. Please return as soon as possible.

Minerva.

**

August 14th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

Got your letter only tonight. Circumstances are difficult. The borders are extremely hard to control these days. Our side need every support they can get. Smugglers are taking advantage of the current confusion and are dealing worse than ever, mainly via fireplaces and frontier gaps. Everyone is on guard these days. Eight-hour shifts. Nothing for civilians, of course. Meaning that I am stuck with the observation of the floo network most of the time. Hate this place for obvious reasons. Will be back as soon as possible.

Severus.

PS: Will the Dementors roam the grounds as well? Or merely guard the entrances?

**

August 19th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I understand that you would be worried about the prospect of Dementors at Hogwarts again, but I can assure you that Albus absolutely refuses to let them anywhere near the school grounds, not to mention inside the castle.

Will the borders be safe? What about the continent? Have you got any news onYou-Know-Who's whereabouts? The Ministry claims that Black will have a hard time breaking through their barriers once he enters the capital, but Albus is almost certain that he will not even try and make it to London. Apparently, someone heard him muttering something about Hogwarts in his cell. Thus the Dementors.

Oh, by the way, if you intended to return before they take up their position at the front gates, you might want to hurry. Hogwarts is high priority ground for the safety officials now. And unless you wish to be examined rather closely by those creatures when trying to enter the castle... well, you get the point.

Sincerely,

Minerva.

**

August 22th, 1993

Thank you. I shall be back before the end of the week.

Severus.

September 3rd, 1993

Dear Severus,

Can you explain to me why you are looking so exceedingly disgruntled these days? Staff meeting at nine, by the way. The Hippogriff's case requires discussion.

Minerva.

**

September 3rd, 1993

Dear Minerva,

Thanks for the reminder. I hope I'll be able to make it in time.

Severus.

**

September 4th, 1993

Severus, what's wrong with you? I haven't seen you like this for a very long time. You seem almost - hostile towards Remus. And I do not think it used to be that bad, even in the old days. What is it?

Minerva.

**

September 5th, 1993

Stop analyzing me.

**

September 5th, 1993

I am not. I am worried. And with good reason. You have got to admit that you are acting strange, Severus. And I do usually not know how to react to your snide remarks, to be honest. Remus is my friend. I will not let you bring myself in such an awkward position. I refuse to be your mediator.

Minerva.

**

September 5th, 1993

I noticed. It is not what I am asking. All I am asking is you to be a bit... more considerate about your own remarks.

Severus.

**

September 5th, 1993

Severus, are you angry because of a simple hug?

**

September 5th, 1993

Don't tell me I do not have the best of reasons.

**

September 5th, 1993

I cannot believe you are jealous at Remus Lupin, Severus.

**

September 5th, 1993

I am not jealous. It was you who said that we ought to be friends, and we have been really successful for a very long time now. I merely think you should not endanger Hogwarts and all its inhabitants yet again because of a stupid relationship. And with an animal!

Good night.

**

September 6th, 1993

How dare you??!!

Severus Snape, I am not talking or writing to you again before I haven't got an apology for that remark.

**

September 6th, 1993

I refuse to take that as a threat.

* * *

**Author's note:** A chapter to fill the gap between the second and the third book, but very sadly I have to say that it is going to be the last for a long time. Possibly for a few months. I intend to continue _Notes_ throughout the HP series, but at the moment the real world is demanding all my attention, and I do not want to continue a fic just for the sake of writing. I will update as soon as I have more time and creativity at hand. But as I say - it may take a while. :( Thanks for all your support so far.


	15. Transcript

**7 September, 1993**

**Transcript of the new term's second scheduled staff meeting**

_Chairwitch: Professor Minerva McGonagall  
**Writer:** Professor Mandragora Sprout  
**Location:** Staff Room  
Staff members present: Minerva McGonagall, Severus Snape, Mandragora Sprout, Rubeus Hagrid, Emeric Flitwick, and Remus Lupin._

**Today's topics:**  
1. Timetables  
2. Funding  
3. Care of Magical Creatures  
4. Misc.

**19:00** Chairwitch opens staff meeting with a short briefing about the nature of the discussion within the ministry concerning the revival of the old Pureblood privileges. Discord among the ministers being the reason why the headmaster cannot be present today.

**19:10** Writer recites today's list of topics

**19:12** Usual endless discussion about timetables.

**19:37** Proud winner: Mandragora Sprout with five fifth-year-free afternoons, Friday night off. Hopeless loser: Remus Lupin. You are excused, dear. You cannot know, of course, what teaching a bunch of tired Slytherin fifth-years on a Friday afternoon actually means - just yet.

**19:38** Professor Snape cannot keep himself from peering over the writer's shoulder in an effort to decipher her handwriting.

**19:40** Professor Snape feels the need of dropping a most inconsiderate remark concerning the general nature of Hufflepuffs. How DARE you?

**19:42** Chairwitch suggests to move on. Writer reads second topic.

**19:44** General disagreement with this year's cut of funding. Chairwitch suggests to cut down the greenhouse supplies. Writer challenges chairwitch to duel.

**19:45** Chairwitch drops highly inadequate remark on writer's credibility.

**19:46** Writer admonished to put down only relevant bits of discussion

**19:50** Decision to restrict to the most necessary acquisitions this year. So - no more Hippogriffs in the backyard, Hagrid.

**20:10** Rough financial plan completed. Remaining ambiguities:  
1. Will there be financial support for the seventh year's study trips?  
2. Will the school governors support two additional Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons per week? (Ready money, isn't it Remus?)  
3. How many potions per annum are obligatory?

**20:15** Professor Snape states that he refuses to pay for a single ingredient the _students_ original term substituted due to immense rudeness put to waste.

**20:16** Chairwitch informs Professor Snape that she believes his remark childish and out of place.

**20:17** Professor Snape informs chairwitch that the opinion of a person who cannot distinguish between a man and a child anyway is of no importance to him.

**20:18** Chairwitch's reply omitted due to profanity

**20:20** Writing duty passes to S. Snape.

**20:35** Discussion on Hippogriff incident cannot come to a conclusion without the headmaster. Chairwitch proves useless in an attempt of soothing a hopelessly blubbering Professor Hagrid.

**20:36** Chairwitch feels need to admonish writer. Seems to be a character trait with her.

**20:37** Writer informs Professor "Noo, be sensible" McGonagall that she was the one insisting on him doing the protocol. He furthermore stresses that he has every right to let the quill do all the work on its own.

**20:38** Professor Lupin enquires about the nature of the writer's excellent quill. Why, that is absolutely none of your concern, you stinking little were-

**20:39** Writing duty goes back to M. Sprout. Writer promises to report reasonably now.

**20:45** Discussion moves on a bit, then chairwitch decides to pull a plug on it and suggests to move to the last topic.

**20:47** Professor Lupin informs staff about Boggart in staff room wardrobe and requests that it should stay there so he can show it to his third-years.

**20:49** Professor Snape drops a highly inconsiderate remark concerning the nature of Professor Lupin's Boggart.

**20:50** Chairwitch glares at Professor Snape and informs him that not everyone can be as lucky as to have the Boggart turn into their own father.

**20:52** Professor Snape slams his fist on the table, utters a few profanities, all directed at chairwitch, and leaves the staff room.

**20:54** Chairwitch suggests to continue, but everyone assures her that there are no more topics to discuss due to look of exhaustion on her face.

**20:55** Writer invites chairwitch for a glass of butterbeer in the Three Broomsticks. Meeting is officially over.


	16. When Things were Picky

**_Fourteenth series of notes: Sep 93 - Oct 93_**

September 9th, 1993

Deputy Headmistress - An incident has come to my attention which I would appreciate very much to have explained. When I entered my classroom this morning, the students were surprisingly quiet, but clearly apprehensive and giggling behind my back. I found the blackboard (usually in an unsoiled state when I am starting my strenuous first day of the week) to be disfigured with an oversized picture of what I presume was meant to be me. Worse: me in a green dress wearing a witch's hat.  
When I walk along the corridors these days I find students whispering and pointing at me, mimicking elderly members of our society, or, indeed, animals. Preferably vultures. Do you have anything to say to that?

With regards,  
S. Snape.

OOO 

September 9th, 1993

Dear Professor,

I am devastated to hear that the current circumstances are inconvenient for you, but please be assured that I have had nothing to do with them. However, given your usual behaviour towards students, I daresay you might want to consider treating them with respect if you expect the same of them.

With kindest regards,  
Professor M. G. McGonagall

OOO 

September 9th, 1993

You are the Deputy Headmistress. It is down to you to prevent cases in which a teacher so blatantly abuses his position. Especially if he is using a blasted Boggart to make fun of his colleagues.

S.

OOO 

September 9th, 1993

Considering that these colleagues have not been working too hard towards a favourable working climate either, I daresay you are just getting back what you dealt out. Seriously, I can more than understand the reasons for Remus's "abuse of position" as you like to call it, seeing as your earlier behaviour was hardly any better. Good Night.

OOO 

September 9th, 1993

Minerva, I demand that you talk to him at least!

OOO 

September 9th, 1993

I have been talking to him every day since he arrived at Hogwarts, my dear.

* * *

October 4th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

A happy birthday to you. May the next century be as pleasant as your first one.

S.

* * *

October 9th, 1993

Sorry to wake you up. Meet me in my office instantly. We will move all students from their dormitories into the Great Hall for tonight. There is a password safety leak.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 9th, 1993

Understood. We are on our way.

OOO 

October 9th, 1993

Where are you?

OOO 

October 9th, 1993

Searching the grounds with Hagrid. The Whomping Willow is healthy and movable as ever. He did not use this way.

Severus.

OOO 

October 9th, 1993

I will be going up the Astronomy Tower. Where is Remus?

OOO 

October 9th, 1993

I do not know. Am planning to scan the Quidditch field now and then return to the Great Hall.

Severus.

OOO 

October 9th, 1993

Understood. Albus asked me to keep an eye on the other tunnels. I expect Remus has gone to search the broader area around the castle.

OOO 

October 9th, 1993

Minerva, I have just been talking to Filch. He does not know about the whereabouts of Lupin. Just as I thought.  
Am going to check on Potter and try to speak to the headmaster.

OOO 

October 9th, 1993

Don't be ridiculous. I know what you are thinking, and it is utter nonsense.

OOO 

October 9th, 1993

You keep saying so, yes. But you will excuse if I take my job a bit more seriously than you and cannot bring myself to trust just any werewolf wandering into our midst, especially if he is in league with Potter's archenemy and the Dark Lord's most loyal supporter.

Severus.

OOO 

October 10th, 1993

What makes you so sure he is in league with Black? Have you ANY actual foundation for the outrageous accusations you are making?

Minerva.

OOO 

October 10th, 1993

Other that what I like to call an unpleasant, lifelong experience with those dimwits? Yes, actually. I have been watching Remus Lupin ever since he set foot in this castle, Minerva.  
And I would have to be VERY mistaken if he really is what he seems. But I shall not go into detail with that. I know we are not sharing the same opinion on that.

Severus.

OOO 

October 11th, 1993

It is not a matter of opinion, Severus! You do not have any proof for your accusation, has that never occurred to you? You are basing your suspicions on a teenage grudge, seeing only what you want to see!  
I thought you had outgrown your childishness and developed a capability of recognising other people's nature without invading their privacy via Legilimency. But obviously I have been mistaken.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 11th, 1993

I prefer not to use Legilimency on animals.

OOO 

October 11th, 1993

Meaning you cannot, because Remus is too skilled an Occlumens for that, if I am not mistaken.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 11th, 1993

I never even knew he _was_ an Occlumens.  
Minerva, had I actually broken my promise to the headmaster and tried to have a look, I would certainly not discuss it with you. But as it is, I am afraid giving a satisfactory reply to your assumption will be impossible.

Severus.

OOO 

October 11th, 1993

Oh, forgive my impertinence. I forgot how you would never in your life break a promise. Especially not one concerning Legilimency.

OOO 

October 11th, 1993

You are being irrelevant.

OOO 

October 11th, 1993

I am talking to a person who has legilimenced practically everyone in his reach ever since his return to Hogwarts. Besides, I am talking to a former student who tried to cheat his way through the O.W.L.s AND the N.E.W.T.s this way. Do not think me stupid, Severus. You would try to read the _Dark Lords_ mind if that would not interfere with your work as a spy. You are using Legilimency on EVERYONE just because you can. Just as Slytherins tend to. The only person on this planet whose mind you have not once tried to invade is your father. Which is speaking for itself, of course.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 11th, 1993

As I say, you are being irrelevant.

S.

OOO 

October 12th, 1993

What are you implying?

S.

OOO 

October 12th, 1993

Why, that you are incapable of dealing with your past, or with your need to overpower other people (and be it students) using the only skill that you truly believe yourself capable of. You have the urge to continuously prove to yourself (and to me, perhaps, I do not know) that you are not the complete failure your father has been making out of you for seventeen years. But at the same time you realise that exactly this urge and everything that came out of it have always been the source for his contempt. Meaning you are resentful towards everyone who is weaker than you. Because they are living proof for your failing to live up to your father's expectations.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 12th, 1993

That is complete nonsense. You are mental. To put it in your students' words.

Severus.

OOO 

October 12th, 1993

That is six trimesters psychology at Oxwitch, my dear.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 12th, 1993

So what ARE you implying? What do you want me to do?

OOO 

October 12th, 1993

First of all I want you to make your own decisions and not ask what you SHOULD do all the time. Do you realise that you are not capable of making one single important decision for yourself? You are utterly dependant on other people. Now, THINK before you reply that this is preposterous and a complete misjudgement on my side. I am aware that you wouldn't consciously do so. But seriously, why would my opinion about your next steps be of any interest for you? Or rather - why should you formulate your question this way? You have not just enquired my opinion just now, Severus. You were asking for an order.  
Second, I advise you to finally go and face your fears. And I do not mean taking You-Know-Who on a ride. It is admirable enough that you constantly do so, but although just about everyone I know would be scared to death at the mere thought of spying on the Death Eaters, this is not what facing YOUR fears is all about. In spite of the danger your job brings with it, your boggart is telling a different story of what you should be fighting against. Speak to you in the morning.

Love,  
Minerva.

* * *

October 13th, 1993

Did I just see Mandragora Sprout zooming about the corridors in search of dried dragonflies?

Severus.

OOO 

October 13th, 1993

Indeed, I think you might have. I believe she is experimenting with flesh-eating pitcher plants now. Tries to cross them with mandrakes, if I am not mistaken.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 13th, 1993

I am going to have a word with her.

OOO 

October 13th, 1993

Calm down, Severus. I was having you on. She is doing a fertilising potion for the holly trees, most probably. You remember that Mr. Ollivander asked for an extra supply on them? Apparently, she let herself be talked round to grow a few of them.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 13th, 1993

Not that she isn't quite round already.

OOO 

October 13th, 1993

No jokes on colleagues' expenses, dear. Incidentally, have you gained some weight?

Sincerely,  
Minerva.

OOO 

October 13th, 1993

Not as much as you, it seems. I swear, your alikeness with that Herbology witch is getting frightening. You don't happen to be pregnant?

Severus.

OOO 

October 13th, 1993

Luckily, I am not that deeply involved with Ollivander.

* * *

October 15th, 1993

Dear Severus,

Albus would like you to supervise the Quidditch training tonight.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 15th, 1993

Whose Quidditch training?

OOO 

October 15th, 1993

Harry Potter's, of course.

OOO 

October 15th, 1993

Excuse me? When did I miss my appointment as Head of Gryffindor?

OOO 

October 15th, 1993

I have other duties, Severus. And apart from that, YOU have been appointed Harry's personal bodyguard, not me.

OOO 

October 15th, 1993

I refuse.

OOO 

October 15th, 1993

You are being childish.

OOO 

October 15th, 1993

Well, as that seems to be your conviction anyway, I do not see a reason to not try and live up to it.

OOO 

October 15th, 1993

Severus, if the training is not supervised, I shall not be able to let the boy play.

OOO 

October 15th, 1993

All the better. Do not forget to let me know who will be his successor.

OOO 

October 17th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I have been talking to Potter and decided spontaneously to ask Rolanda to do the job, seeing as she still owes me a favour. Shall be very pleased to see you lose, once more, in a few weeks' time.

Minerva.

* * *

October 28th, 1993

Minerva, I believe we shall have to change the Quidditch timetable with regards to the match on Saturday. Young Malfoy's arm is still in a worrying state and we do not have a substitute player.

S.

OOO 

October 28th, 1993

What are you talking about? The Quidditch rules state that if you do not have a substitute player you are to play without a Seeker. Bad luck, I should say.

OOO 

October 28th, 1993

The rules state that I can ask for a change of schedule once during a season. Since I have not asked before, I believe you have to grant me this little favour.

OOO 

October 28th, 1993

Severus, can it be that you just do not want to play in this weather? Has Flint been talking you into this, or is Malfoy really still in such a bad state? I seem to have been told that he was boxing another student's ear the other day, which I find astounding, considering that he is not left-handed as far as my knowledge goes. But I might be mistaken, of course.

Greetings, Minerva.

OOO 

October 28th, 1993

You are mistaken, I am sure. It would not be the first time that you simply believe the rumours crossing the school corridors. No need to make such outrageous assumptions. I only cheat when I have to.

Severus.

OOO 

October 28th, 1993

The game is in three days' time, Severus. What do you expect me to tell the students?

OOO 

October 28th, 1993

Why do you worry? Yours have been training, have they not? I have written to Mandragora Sprout, giving her a short explanation of the situation. She has agreed without much further ado. A commendable attitude, don't you think?

Severus.

OOO 

October 28th, 1993

You only think so, because she never objects to your preposterous suggestions. Very well then, I shall be talking to Wood this afternoon. Do not think you will wriggle yourself out of another humiliating game, though. We'll wipe your silver-green backsides as easily in spring.

Minerva.

OOO 

October 28th, 1993

I do hope you are talking about broomsticks.

OOO 

October 28th, 1993

Goes without saying.


	17. When Things Got Homey

**_Fifteenth series of notes: Nov 93_**

November 5th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I hear you took over for Remus today? Is there any specific reason why three of my third-year girls came up to me after their Defence lesson to complain about the way you taught it? Or have you just been your usual unbearable self?

Minerva.

OOO

November 5th, 1993

I would appreciate if you refrained from being insulting. Teaching your third-years must have been the most stressful thing that has happened to me in months. Why is it that every class I have been teaching today was better behaved than this one? You really ought to try and keep that Granger brat under control. I swear, she is getting worse than Lily Potter at her time.

Regards,  
Severus.

OOO

November 5th, 1993

I shall assume that you are not trying to wind me up again. In any case, I am appalled by what the girls told me, providing that at least part of it was based on facts. I find it unbelievable how you treat our students, Severus, but I have told you so before and I refuse to be your baby-sitter. You will see how far you get with that attitude of yours.

Minerva.

OOO

November 5th, 1993

I have an attitude? Is it my fault that Gryffindors are just frankly unable to stick to the simplest of rules? I do not demand much in my lessons, Minerva, and even the most ignorant of Hufflepuffs (which is saying something) was clever enough to figure out that the rules I set for the dungeons account for whatever lesson I happen to be teaching. Only Potter and his idiot friends saw the need of winding everything, obviously because they are used to Lupin's unprofessional standards. I am seriously wondering how he puts up with them. I am also surprised how you put up with Potter, by the way. Because, quite frankly, I think neither he nor someone like Ronald Weasley belong at a renowned school like Hogwarts.

Severus.

OOO

November 5th, 1993

I am GOING to assume that with "someone like Ronald Weasley" you are referring to neither his family's attitude towards Muggles and Muggleborns, nor to their possessions or status within our society. Because in that case, I would have to consider you the most ignorant, ridiculous, narrow-minded, annoying person I have ever met. And that is beating Cornelius Fudge to the position.

Minerva.

OOO

November 5th, 1993

I am honoured to have risen this much in your esteem.

* * *

Personal Organiser of Madame Poppy Pomfrey, school nurse

November 6th, 1993

Today's Quidditch match was a complete disaster. Several students were taken to the hospital wing with late effects of the Dementors' presence at the pitch earlier this evening. Almost every child in first and second year had to be given some chocolate and be sent to bed early. The older students took the incident remarkably well, seeing as they started fooling around in the corridors again less than two hours later.  
Furthermore, a student was taken to me after the match who had been playing in it and, apparently, lost control of his broom. I daresay I have told the headmaster often enough that this dangerous game could do with some school-internal extra rules, but no... he has to have it exactly the way the professionals play it. Says the students ought to learn for later life. At all costs - almost.  
It is what he keeps saying, of course, but I do not understand why he does not leap into action against these horrible Dementors. He should have known they would not stick to the agreement. He should have known they would not be able to resist a Quidditch match out in the open - with hundreds of people watching.  
The Dementors, of course, have had equal effects on students and teachers. Ever since his post-match encounter with a handful of them, Severus Snape has been in need of regular attendance, even if he refuses to temporarily move to the hospital wing as I suggested. I have gone down to his quarters several times now, providing him with ingredients, which, at his current state, he seems unable to obtain on his own. I have also been trying to talk him into eating a regular small dose of chocolate, but he refuses obstinately.  
Because of these regular visits, in fact, I am making this entry, needing to put down a conversation between Professors Snape and McGonagall, which I overheard today through the half-open door of the former's apartment in the dungeons - by mere accident, of course. It does not make much sense to me, as I have neither a lot of insight in the two Professors' relationship, nor do I know a lot about Professor Snape's past, but many things were interesting and insightful nevertheless, so I'll put them down exactly as I heard them, starting the moment Minerva rushed past me and into his room, not gracing me with a single glance:

'Severus! Remus told me you'd come down here to -... good gracious! What happened?'  
'Nothing of importance.'  
'You look paler than I have seen you in years. Have you been flying?'  
'If you want to be sarcastic, Minerva, I ask you to please leave and come back tomorrow. I am really not in the mood for your jokes.'  
'Have you been eating?'  
'Not much.'  
'Drinking?'  
'Minerva!'  
'I am just worried!'  
'Indeed? Well, how fortunate for you to have Remus Lupin as a best friend. Cry over his shoulder, why don't you?'  
'You are being ridiculous, Severus, and you know it!'  
'I know that you are invading my privacy. These are my private quarters and I wish to be alone.' 'There isn't any privacy left for you, which I haven't invaded at least once, don't forget!'  
'I remember. Your... subtlety concerning my family.'  
'Concerning your father, you mean?''Come on, Severus, it is not very hard to guess what memories the Dementors reduce you to.'  
'Shut up.'  
'I want to help you, Severus.'  
'I do not need your help! Especially concerning family matters!'  
'No. Very clearly you need _professional_ treatment there.'  
'What is that supposed to mean?'  
'What do you think? Do you actually believe your irrational fear of your father can be very healthy? Do you think it normal that a mere Boggart can put you down like that? When even third-year students are capable of fighting them by means of the 'Ridikkulus' spell?'  
'I encountered _Dementors_ today, not Boggarts, Minerva! And just in case you failed to notice: there were three of them!'  
'Well, under normal circumstances three Dementors are easily opposable for a fully grown wizard of your talent, Severus, has that never occurred to you?'  
'It depends on one's disposition, I daresay!'  
'It depends on how and if you have dealt with certain occurrences in your past, my dear. I am sure that if you tried to make up with him...'  
'_Forget it!_ No more of that!'  
'...you would have less difficulties when your Boggart threatens you with a belting. That's all I'm saying.'  
'You are being ridiculous!'  
'And you are being childish and stubborn!'  
'Well, I expect you would say that to any person who is half a century younger than you are!'  
'Careful, Mr. Snape, I shall not be taking impertinence from a student.'  
'I AM NOT BEING IMPERTINENT!!Strictly speaking I am not a student either.You were being sarcastic, weren't you?Don't give me that look. I know very well what you are trying to convey to me.Oh, very well. I am sorry. I told you I am not in the mood for sarcasm.'  
'So - what happened? You have been to Hogsmeade, haven't you?'  
'Bought some leeches.'  
'Fresh ones?'  
'Pickled. And a hand full of Ashwinder eggs.'  
'Not asking. And when you returned to the gates, you...'  
'...met those blasted creatures guarding the entrance. I'd counted on one. But three I had not expected. They'd come up for the match. At that point, I suppose I was lucky it was only the three of them.'  
'And what happened?'  
'Well, you know the kind of effect they have. And you know that I am here, so I did not die of shock.'  
'There is no need to be embarrassed about it, Severus.'  
'I am not.'  
'You look embarrassed.'  
'I am tired.'  
'I see.Severus, I...'  
'Don't...'  
'I cannot help thinking that it might help if you at least let him know that you are alive.'  
'Minerva! I _told_ you that is out of question. When will you stop pestering me with such ridiculous suggestions?'  
'As soon as you stop lying to yourself. And as soon as you stop jumping behind the next couch at the sight of a Boggart. And as soon as you stop fainting before having time to conjure your Patronus.'  
'I didn't faint!'  
'Remus told me a different story!'  
'Well, that means that Remus is lying!'  
'What happened then? Did you succeed in conjuring your Patronus? How come Remus told me they had to half carry you up to the castle if you did not pass out? -Which would be perfectly understandable, not that you think I wish to deny that! How come you are here now, looking like a living corpse if you have 'no problem at all' with your past and with the memories of your father?''Severus, I do not want to harm you. But you have got to see that things cannot continue like this. Even your Occlumency barrier is not safe this way. If You-Know-Who discovers that all he has to do is throw a few parental memories at you to open...'  
'My Occlumency wall is perfectly safe!'  
'Oh is it? Would you like to put that matter to the test? Would you like me to call Albus and see if you can withstand a memory attack of... say... the events after your disastrous OWL exams?'  
'They weren't disastrous!'  
'You know what I mean, Severus. They were disastrous to someone who believes Transfiguration the key subject of everything Hogwarts offers. To someone who regards Defence Against the Dark Arts as something you could just as easily learn in the wizarding army and Potions as a waste of time. You are well aware what I am talking about, Severus. Your expression proves it.'  
'Hag.'  
'By definition, yes.'  
'Can I think about it?'  
'Of course, you can. It is your decision, after all.'  
'_Of course._'  
'Well then.'  
'Well then. I am sure you have work to do.'  
'Yes. Yes, indeed. Would you like me to... come again when you are a bit more... stable?''Yes, that would be nice.'  
'Very well then.'  
'Give my regards to the werewolf.'  
'I could, you know.'  
'Don't you dare.'  
'I seem to remember you said you weren't in the mood for sarcasm.'  
'I am not.'

* * *

November 8th, 1993

Dear Severus,

Full explanation for the round fifty you have taken from my house today, please.

Minerva.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

Your students were misbehaving, as always.

Severus.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

Dear Severus,

That is no reason to take as many as this, and you know it.

Minerva.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I can take as many points as I like if your students are assaulting mine.

Severus.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I doubt that most of your students can be properly assaulted. At least not those in third-year. Or am I mistaken in thinking that Potter and his friends would have problems overcoming a Vincent Crabbe or a Gregory Goyle?!

Minerva.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I believe you might be mistaken in that point. There is a number of students in my house who are not as well-built as those two, one of whom has been attacked with a crocodile heart today. But you have always been slightly biased in this respect, of course.

Severus.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

Oh, here we go again. I am being biased? It is always the poor, hapless Slytherins who are worthy of protection, and no one else, isn't it? Is there ever going to be a time when you realise that just because you happened to be on the receiving side AND in Slytherin that there might be such people everywhere? I am aware that you will probably not be very pleased to hear it, but there happens to be a younger version of yourself in my house these days, being bullied by none other than his Potions teacher. There _are_ Gryffindor victims as well, Severus, even if you do not like to see it.

Minerva.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

That is a preposterous comparison. Neville Longbottom is a fool.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

In some respects that might be the case, Severus, but so were you! Or - could be. I seem to remember you skiving off flying classes, handing in homework late and failing disastrously in every other Transfiguration exam.  
Neville is, more than anything else, a child who needs our protection and encouragement. You know I hardly ever complain about your teaching methods, but can you explain to me why he fears you so much? Can you explain to me why his Boggart turns into you?

Minerva.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

Yes, he is a child. Full of fears, probably, as any of us, and full of confusion - perhaps a bit more than any of us. But the point is that one ought to be able to see things rationally and do something about one's flaws if they are as obvious as this. If you are confused, make notes. If you cannot concentrate, keep trying until you can. If you fail a subject, make an effort of getting better. The point is that he is incapable of getting a grip onto himself. That is what I find annoying.

Severus.

OOO

November 8th, 1993

Severus Snape, I have heard these words before, and not from your lips. THINK about what you say. THINK just how much this sounds like something your father would have told me in those days. And THEN try to explain to my why the only subject in which Neville constantly goes to pieces is Potions!

Minerva.

* * *

November 10th, 1993

Dear Severus,

Thank you for the report of the Defence lessons you gave. Please remember handing in the remaining one (third-year) as well. I shall need it by Thursday evening if you please.

Minerva.

OOO

November 10th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I settled the matter with Lupin directly and he stressed the point that he would not like to see a report on that specific lesson.

Severus.

OOO

November 10th, 1993

Dear Severus,

I am sure that is the case. However, the lesson has been given, so I need a report for the official files at the very least. Not necessarily a detailed truth, seeing as you seem to have used this opportunity to take out another of your personal vendettas (which I greatly disapprove of, by the way). But there has to be a report. Anything. Just give the number of the pages you covered and what homework you gave. If any.

Greetings, Minerva.

OOO

November 10th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

Seeing as Lupin felt the need of undermining my authority by annulling the homework given, I shall be unable to add it to my report. With regard to everything else, I hope the official form sheet will do.

Regards, Severus.

OOO

November 10th, 1993

Dear Severus,

The form sheet will be perfect. Thank you.

Minerva.

OOO

REPORT OVER LESSON GIVEN 29 November, 1993  
BY Professor Severus Snape  
IN SUBST. OF Professor Remus Lupin

PAGES OR TOPICS COVERED: 394 - 397, werewolves

AIM OF THE LESSON: Acquisition of Identification and Fighting Techniques

DEGREE OF SUCCESS: n/a

HOMEWORK: put off until teacher has brought safety distance between self and students

COMMENTS: Level of students was unexpectedly low. One gets the impression they are held on a first form level on purpose. Topic covered was overdue. Also, accidental observations on teacher's grading suggest that he is either inept or biased. Personally, I suspect both. Students were unusually restless and noisy. I presume they are not properly disciplined during the normal course of this subject. Questions were only hesitantly answered, if at all, and a startling cheek could be observed with several of them. All in all, a worrying situation, which, I am sure, will require some closer investigation.

November 10th, 1993, Severus Snape

OOO

November 11th, 1993

Severus, I want a word.

Minerva.


	18. When Things Upset

**_Sixteenth series of notes: Nov 93 - April 1994_**

November 12th, 1993

Feeling better? Care for an evening at Rosmerta's?

OOO

November 12th, 1993

Just you and me? Like in the old days? I'll be there.

OOO

November 12th, 1993

At nine.

OOO

November 13th, 1993

I did not believe I would ever write something like this, but I thank you for the splendid belated birthday celebration. You and the others. It was highly... enjoyable.

OOO

November 13th, 1993

Your very welcome, Severus. I also thought it was very enjoyable. And Mandy is still down there chewing liquorice drops, if I know anything about her. A thoroughly delightful evening, I agree.   
Just wondering why Remus did not join us, really. I told him specifically how nice it would be if he came over. I have still not given up hope that you two might make up one of these days.

Minerva.

OOO

November 13th, 1993

On the risk of sounding off-putting... his absence WAS the enjoyable part.

S.

OOO

Novemeber 13th, 1993

On the risk of sounding off-putting... we can still arrange something.

M.

OOO

November 13th, 1993

I would much prefer an evening with you.

Severus.

OOO

November 14th, 1993

Severus, we have had this. It is both, dangerous and unnecessary. You know what these meetings do to us.

OOO

November 14th, 1993

Yes, I do.

* * *

November 27th, 1993

You owe me three Galleons.

OOO

November 27th, 1993

You just wait until spring.

* * *

December 6th, 1993

Five points from Slytherin for being a grumpy old man, Severus.

OOO

December 6th, 1993

I beg your pardon?

OOO

December 6th, 1993

Mandy told me that you took points of Gryffindor for Weasley throwing a snowball at you?

OOO

December 6th, 1993

Yes. So?

OOO

December 6th, 1993

We have been waiting for ages this year, my dear. Even Emeric joined in the snowball fight. And Stochastica. You can be such a grinch, Severus.

OOO

December 7th, 1993

That. Was not. Funny.

OOO

December 7th, 1993

Who called me a grinch only yesterday? I am merely taking your advice.

Regards,   
Severus.

OOO

December 7th, 1993

How dare you ridicule me in such an impertinent manner by creating a Snow-Minerva? What if the students find out that it wasn't the Weasleys but a member of staff?? You just wait until I find the spell you used.

Minerva.

OOO

December 7th, 1993

A Potion. Quite naturally. Mandy helped develop it.

* * *

December 18th, 1993

Will you join us at Rosmerta's today? I believe Cornelius Fudge is going to come and give us some update on the Black affair.

Minerva.

OOO

December 18th, 1993

Hogwarts supervision duty for me, I am afraid. But afterwards I shall be happy to hear what he had to say. Hope they have finally got hold of the git's track. Cannot wait till they fleece that man, though it might be a nice touch if he did turn up at Hogwarts and I got the chance of doing it personally.

Severus.

OOO

December 18th, 1993

Really, Severus, I cannot think of anything to reply to that.

Minerva.

* * *

December 25th, 1993

I have the urgent suspicion that a certain Head of House is responsible for Potter's latest Christmas present. How dare you, Minerva? That is cheating!

Severus.

OOO

December 25th, 1993

What are you talking about? Are you going to join us in the afternoon? Christmas feast at five in the Great Hall. It is potatoes and tripe, I hear. Just what you like.

Minerva.

OOO

December 25th, 1993

I have to. The headmaster insisted that I come. Tripe is your area of expertise, I seem to remember. Incidentally, I am talking about Potter's new broomstick, of course. Witch.

OOO

December 25th, 1993

I did not know he received a broomstick at last. Splendid news, I must say. Thanks for informing me so early on. Incidentally... I dread the answer, but how do you know about Potter's Christmas presents only a few hours after he gets them?

Minerva.

OOO

December 25th, 1993

I take my job seriously.

OOO

December 25th, 1993

So you are still baby-sitting him, are you?

OOO

December 25th, 1993

Guarding! The word is guarding.

* * *

December 26th, 1993

Dear Minerva,

I would like to know what you intend to do on the Firebolt matter.

Severus.

OOO

December 26th, 1993

I have been talking to Rolanda, and she suggests to strip it down layer by layer.

Minerva.

OOO

December 26th, 1993

Is that your way of proving to me that it was not you who sent it to him? Do you think me stupid? You gave him the Nimbus!

Severus.

OOO

December 26th, 1993

I have better things to do than spoiling my students with overly expensive presents, my dear. For now at least.   
The broom was definitely not given to Potter by anyone he knows or can think of. I believe it very likely that Black sent it. It is just the thing he would do - knowing that Harry would have inherited James's talent.

Minerva.

* * *

February 3rd, 1994

Hear Potter got his broom back?

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

Indeed, he has.

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

Not found any jinxes?

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

No. And it is hard to fool Emeric.

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

You checked it on Diving Curses?

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

Yes, we have. Unnecessarily, of course, as Harry could not that easily be harmed by a simple unexpected dive. Unlike others. Is someone getting worried?

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

No need to get saucy. Just checking whether you are doing your job as Head of Gryffindor, that's all.

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

Actually, this is not part of my job, Severus.

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

I know. You want to win the match.

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

Indeed, I do.

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

Well, you won't.

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

Want a bet on that?

OOO

February 3rd, 1994

Not with Potter on an international standard broom, thank you.

* * *

February 19th, 1994

Coming to the pub tonight?

Love,   
Minerva.

OOO

February 19th, 1994

No. And you are not fooling anyone.

Severus.

OOO

February 19th, 1994

What do you mean I am not fooling anyone?

OOO

February 19th, 1994

There used to be a time when 'love' under a letter seemed appropriate. I seem to think, however, that these times have long passed and that now an overall more formal way of addressing each other might be more appropriate.

Regards,   
Severus.

OOO

February 19th, 1994

What are you talking about? You are being ridiculous. It has been a difficult year, certainly, and the regulations are strict as ever, but that does not mean things cannot change again. It does not change the feeling inside, does it?

Minerva.

OOO

February 19th, 1994

Personally, I have to say most of my 'feeling' died when you decided that your time was better spent with animals.

Severus.

OOO

February 19th, 1994

Severus Snape, the last thing I need at times like this is a jealous, narrow-minded Slytherin at my heels, who is not to stupid, but too stubborn to see the truth in Remus's and my relationship.   
Purely platonic relationship, if I might add.   
Seriously, Severus, my mind is on Sirius Black most of the time at the moment, and I simply do not have the nerve for having to continuously pledge you my undying devotion. If what used to be between us means so little to you, then by all means I shall see to that my feeling for the king of self-pity dies as well.   
Good day, your grace.

Minerva.

OOO

February 19th, 1994

I am not pitying myself. Not for the loss of a lycantrophile pervert. Thank you.

OOO

February 19th, 1994

I am WARNING you, Severus. Another remark like that and I shall pull the plug to our relationship once and for all.

OOO

February 19th, 1994

I shall try and think of one.

* * *

Diary of Albus Dumbledore, February 22nd, 1994

Night has fallen, once again, over the castle that has become my home in so many years. I am lying in my bed, thinking about matters that occurred today, trying to get them in line. But I feel more or less content as far as overall matters are concerned. My visit to Hagrid's, of course, was slightly unnerving. He is suffering greatly from the thought of losing Buckbeak the Hippogriff to a hangman, and I am not quite sure myself whether there is any way of legally preventing the imminent execution at this point. Just as myself, Hagrid is not too confident concerning the appeal, since we are both aware of the corruption of the Committee for the Disposal of Dangerous Creatures and the school governors. Also, we both know Lucius Malfoy, of course, and what he can do if sufficiently provoked.   
Much of to my surprise, I also happened to stumble across Severus and Minerva in the rose gardens tonight. When returning from Hagrid's hut, I decided to begin my usual stroll about the castle on the grounds this evening and accidentally overheard the following conversation:

'...said you had your mind on Black the whole time. You specifically stated it in one of your notes!'   
'But that's not what I meant, Severus! Are you being childish on purpose, or can you not see that I am merely worried about our students' safety?'   
'Then why won't you see Lupin for what he is?'   
'I see a fabulous teacher in Remus, my friend. Even if you obviously hold a different view on the matter. But it is not his fault that you want the job so badly, and it is not his fault that you don't get it either. Can you not see that your blind jealousy is not taking you anywhere? It is just... so very out of place. I cannot believe it. I cannot believe you doubt my motives concerning Remus. I cannot believe you doubt his - concerning Hogwarts. And Dumbledore. Do you really know him so little? You used to be friends in the early years.'   
'Nonsense!'   
'Well, as good as. You didn't fight him after all. In... in later years.'   
'That was because I knew what he WAS! Do you think me stupid? Who would tackle a werewolf in the open?'   
'You did. Several times. Before you found out.'   
'Pft. A puppy.'   
'I should not think it should be that much of a difference whether he was fifteen or sixteen years old, Severus.'   
'In any case, your sudden affection doesn't mean that _I_ suddenly like him.'   
'I know! And you do not have to! All I ask of you is to accept that I will not give up our friendship just for the sake of your jealousy. If you cannot accept that I am friends with a werewolf, then I cannot help you, Severus.'   
'You are NOT just friends with him.'   
'Oh, really? And how would you know?'   
'I have seen you!'   
'Well, and you can hear what I am telling you. Whom to you trust more, your blinded eyes or the affirmation of the woman you love?'   
'I... that's not... I KNOW what I see.'   
'And _I_ know what I FEEL! How about you?'   
'I... I... It doesn't matter, does it? There cannot be any discussion about it anyway.'   
'I believe there ought to be a discussion about it, Severus.'   
'Well, I don't!'

And he turned and left. I had hardly time for putting up a Disillusionment Charm, but he spotted me anyway. Severus is a sharp observer and still - can be very mysterious even to me sometimes. He gave me a tired look, pulled a hardly visible grimace and vanished inside the castle. When I turned, Minerva had gone as well - on four paws, presumably. If only there was a way to help those two. But under the current circumstances, with Sirius Black on the loose, and Tom Riddle somewhere out there playing Dark Evil Overlord, I shall have to resume to simple appeasing actions, such as seating the two of them next to each other at our next feast. Perhaps that will do some good.

* * *

March 1st, 1994

Dear Minerva,

Please remember giving me the exact dates for the sixth-year study trip.

Regards,   
Severus.

OOO

March 1st, 1994

Dear Severus,

The exact dates will have to be subject to discussion at the staff meeting tonight. However, some things seem very clear already. The length of the trip, for example, will certainly not exceed three days, for that is all our funding allows.   
Incidentally, Hagrid would like to know whether you need any ingredients from the Forbidden Forest. He is going in, the night after tomorrow, but says that the centaurs refuse to sacrifice any more tail hair. You will have to resort to alternative material for your Anti-Ageing Lotions.

Best regards,   
Minerva.

OOO

March 1st, 1994

What are you talking about? I am NOT brewing Anti-Ageing Lotions!   
See you at the staff meeting.

Severus.

March 4th, 1994

Dear Severus,

I would like to remind you of the Hogsmeade parade this weekend. I know for certain that Alastor will be there, as well as some of his younger colleagues, who are former students of mine. Do you remember young Robertson?   
So Remus and I decided to go and watch the parade on Saturday. Please consider coming with us. I know what this decision means for you, and yet I beseech you to see this as the chance it is. I believe that you will meet your father again sooner or later, and this seems an excellent opportunity to not let it happen in a deserted street at night.   
Think about it.

Minerva.

OOO

March 4th, 1994

One word: no.

* * *

April 13th, 1994

Will I see you on the teachers' stand on Saturday? Or are you going to sulk for the rest of your days?

Minerva.

OOO

April 14th, 1994

That. Was. Rude.   
I expect your apology by tonight.

Minerva.

OOO

April 15th, 1994

Severus, I demand that you talk to me or write a note. This cannot continue. I have no intention to take your childish insults personally, but you will have to admit that your worries were unfounded for once, and that the encounter with your father was overall pleasant. It is not my fault you cannot seem to be seeing things rationally. He, obviously, has finally made this step.   
In any case, your personal vendetta with him is no reason to insult me in the corridor, in front of students, so closely before exam time.   
And I am serious, I demand an apology this time.

Minerva.

OOO

April 16th, 1994

My worries have been unfounded? What do YOU know about my worries? What do YOU know what seeing that man again after so many years actually means? And you _did_ notice him putting me down in front of you and Remus, did you not? My worries have been unfounded. Ts.   
No, he did not attack me in front of half a dozen Ministry wizards at the parade. That means, of course, that he does not remember what happened. You have no idea, Minerva. I am telling you, he still bears a grudge.

Severus.

OOO

April 16th, 1994

He looked quite content, though, did he not? Rather calm?

OOO

April 16th, 1994

Minerva! You KNOW that man! You KNOW how well he is capable of biting back his emotions when thinking it will serve his purpose. Yet, now he knows that I live. Knows where I am and how to find me. Do you not fear he might change his mind and come after me when he has thought matters through?   
That man has the power of imprisoning people without an official sanction by the Ministry of Magic. Does that not worry you in the slightest?

OOO

April 16th, 1994

Severus, you are making mountains out of molehills.   
He is your father. He will not harm you.

Minerva.

OOO

April 16th, 1994

That, from your mouth, is frankly disappointing.

OOO

April 16th, 1994

You know what I mean, Severus. You are a grown man. Your father is no longer responsible for your education - nor for any other action of yours. Why should he be taking interest?

Minerva.

OOO

April 16h, 1994

Because he will want revenge, Minerva.

OOO

April 16th, 1994

What FOR? For Merlin's sake, you are keeping something from me, Severus. Have been, for the last fourteen years. Will you speak plainly at last? What do you fear? What makes you think he will imprison you? He cannot know you were Death Eater. There is no way he could!

Minerva.

OOO

April 16th, 1994

He knows.

OOO

April 16th, 1994

How?

OOO

April 16th, 1994

Because I tried to kill him.

OOO

April 16th, 1994

I... Severus, I... Can we meet after the match tonight? In private? I will have to talk to you in person.

OOO

April 16th, 1994

Yes, we have to talk.


	19. When Things Harmonised

**_Seventeenth series of notes: Apr 94 - Jul 94_**

April 17th, 1994

Very well then.

OOO

April 17th, 1994

Very well what?

OOO

April 17th, 1994

I shall be trying to put up with the werewolf. But do not expect too much. If he does not co-operate, I will not go out of my way to make this a long-lasting friendship. I see the necessity of working together, but you never said I'd have to like him.

Severus.

OOO

April 17th, 1994

Anything other than this open hostility will do for me.

Minerva.

OOO

April 18th, 1994

He called me a coward! In front of Mandy AND Emeric!

OOO

April 18th, 1994

Severus, he said you were emotionally unstable. That is something entirely different. And do you not think you have displayed exactly that with this outbreak of yours? His remark was not inept. Your reaction to it, however, was.

Minerva.

OOO

April 18th, 1994

Yes, go on. Side with him.

OOO

April 19th, 1994

Severus, I DO appreciate that you are making an effort. I really do. But you are making things more difficult than they would have to be. Remus is not trying to wind you up. He is trying to help you. As am I.  
Will you try and give the matter one last chance? We are going to meet in the Three Broomsticks tonight and I would love you to come. I really would.

Minerva.

* * *

April 20th, 1994

Werewolf - I am writing this letter as a last means of warning, advising you to take its content very seriously:  
Keep your hairy paws off Minerva McGonagall! Stay away from her. Do not so much as LOOK at her the way you did last night. Should I find out that you have approached her, you will find out what the wrath of a Snape means for the health of your kidneys. I am going to flay you with a silver knife, take out your bowels and use them for poisoning Muggle children. I swear I will. For the last time: PAWS OFF!!  
She is mine.

Severus.

OOO

April 20th, 1994

Dear Severus,

What are you talking about? What did I do? Incidentally, I am well aware of what the wrath of a Snape means.

Greetings,  
Remus.

OOO

April 25th, 1994

Dear Severus,

Whatever you wrote in that letter to Remus (no, he did not show it to me), I demand that you come and talk to him in person. Or me, at least. I am sick and tired of this persistent sulking of yours, as if you were a student. We can deal with this like grown-ups, I think. For the last time: Act. Your. Age. I am fed up with having to look after you as if the last thirty years had never happened.

Minerva.

OOO

April 25th, 1994

How DARE you do that to me? How dare you side with a 'person' like that as though what I liked to think of as our friendship had never happened? How dare you go out with that maggot and make it look like it is my own fault? Cover your infidelity with the Hogwarts rules as if talking things out would cause only even more trouble? Who am I to you, Minerva, a friend? Or some sort of leftover from the times when you had to stand up against father for me? Am I still the child I was in your eyes, Deputy Headmistress, or were you talking to a grown-up when pledging to me that there would never be a time when I would have to do without you?  
I ask you to make your decision now, Minerva McGonagall, or I will leave the castle. Because, very honestly, I do not see a reason for remaining just for you to live your nursing complex out on.  
Decide. Now.

Severus.

* * *

April 29th, 1994

Headmaster, due to unalterable personal problems I shall have to resign from all teaching duties at Hogwarts immediately.

Sincerely,  
Severus.

OOO

May 4th, 1994

Dear Severus,

I am not currently at Hogwarts, so your letter did not reach me until today. Being in London at present I am afraid I shall be unable to assist you with your problems or provide comfort in any way. I advise you, however, not to hasten your judgement in this matter, especially of people.  
You know very well, of course, that I cannot let you go just like that. There is too much at stake. You know that, Severus. You cannot just leave Hogwarts. And nor can Minerva McGonagall or Remus Lupin, if that is going to be the next thing you suggest.

Await my return.  
Albus.

* * *

May 29th, 1994

Dear Severus,

I have put a lot of thought into your last letter. Indeed, for once your accusations seem not unfounded, but rather enlightening, as far as our recent misunderstandings are concerned. I believe that a confession will be required to solve this matter, and I am terribly sorry if I have lured you into believing things that are not as they appear to be.  
First of all, please forgive the way I have been talking to you these last months. I realise that I did not reflect on my general tone much, seeing as I have not had this kind of trouble with any of my friends before. There is, of course, a certain temptation to regard everyone as a student, in spite of them having long grown up. It is a matter of habit and, in my defence, also a question of how you talk to me. It seems you are seeking guidance for certain things rather than support. It seems you are seeking, desperately, for a way to organise your life more or less decently without getting into trouble similar to what happened to you after your NEWT examinations. Every letter, every sentence that you produce seem to be asking for directions. Please realise that I have never wanted anything but to help you. Even when concerning myself with contacting your father or trying to reunite you and Remus, earlier this year.  
I am trying to make you see things, which you have kept missing for over thirty years now, and you are right - that is not or should not be my task. I realise that my efforts can be seen as a nuisance as well as the support they were supposed to provide and that I am sorry for. Because some things you will not... cannot understand with just a few decades of life-experience.  
I expect this sounds presumptuous to you, but there are matters you do not know enough about yet where I currently see you heading into trouble. As in the matter of your father. I can assure you that he is much easier to deal with if you approach him on your own accord. And if he thinks he is talking to a grown-up. This is what you will have to achieve if you have any interest in him not persecuting you to the end of the world if he finds out about your Death Eater past. Has he spoken to you again, by the way? I hear you went down to London this weekend?

Love,  
Minerva.

OOO

May 29th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I did go to London, but only to see Sir Jigger about some of his antidotes. No personal business. I cannot bring myself to make my return in Camden. Not yet. Then again, I did see father. Yes. Nothing spectacular, however.  
Curious though you may be, I shall not waste time and parchment to tell you about it.

Regards,  
Severus. OOO

May 29th, 1994

Please do.

OOO

May 29th, 1994

I refuse. The matter is perfectly personal. Nothing to satisfy an obtrusive Deputy Headmistress's insufferable curiosity.

Regards,  
Severus.

OOO

May 29th, 1994

I am a witch. It is my business to be curious about things.

OOO

May 29th, 1994

I get the feeling that you are mixing up something vital here.

Severus.

OOO

May 29th, 1994

I get the feeling that you are winding me up on purpose in order to make you tell me.

Minerva

OOO

May 29th, 1994

Please rest assured that this is not the case.

* * *

May 30th, 1994

Severus, I am SO sorry.

OOO

May 30th, 1994

No need to worry. There will be another year. Another chance.

OOO

May 30th, 1994

I am NOT talking about the house cup. You do not deserve it, so you did not get it. It is all fair and square.  
But I wish to apologise for what happened on Saturday. I had no idea. Why did you not tell me? You do trust me, do you not? And I am sure it would have been a relief to talk about things.

OOO

May 30th, 1994

How do YOU know what happened on Saturday?

OOO

May 30th, 1994

Albus has told me. Please, Severus, let's meet and talk about the matter. It is getting critical, and you know it. I feel I could help you decide which step will be the best to take. And you ought to tell someone about what is going on inside you, however Mandy-Sprout-like this may sound.  
Please?

OOO

May 30th, 1994

There is much to do. I suggest we put this off until the exam week is over.

OOO

May 30th, 1994

Yes, that may indeed be the best solution.

* * *

June 7th, 1994

Calm down and tell me what happened. Via owl, if you must.

Minerva.

OOO

June 7th, 1994

Oh, I am merely surprised that NO ONE SEEMS TO MIND Black's escape! Or that Potter helped him escape. Or bloody Lupin. Not even the headmaster seems to care about anything these days! I'll go down to dinner in a moment, but do not talk to me. I am not in the best of moods.

Severus.

OOO

June 7th, 1994

Severus, WHAT where was the need to embarrass Remus like that? No matter how angry you are, from what I have heard you have EXPOSED his identity to our STUDENTS!!? How COULD you??  
I am very disappointed.

Minerva.

OOO

June 7th, 1994

It was an accident.

OOO

June 7th, 1994

Don't you lie to me! You can tell that to people like Albus who do not care about your general demeanour as long they can be sure you are basically on our side, but I dare you to lie to me. Or to deny your guilt in this.  
Giving away Remus's true identity was WRONG! Have you any idea what the consequences will be?

Minerva.

OOO

June 7th, 1994

I do. Just an added bonus to the laugh I had of his reaction.

Severus.

OOO

June 7th, 1994

You are the most stubborn, narrow-minded, foolish person I know, Severus. If I only knew what makes me forgive you every single time you do something like this to me.

OOO

June 7th, 1994

He went away rather willingly, did he not? I expect he realised that after tonight staying would have been worse than just taking his leave.

Severus.

OOO

June 7th, 1994

Merlin knows, the matter could have come to a different end. Still, that does not excuse your preposterous behaviour. Your distrust, your general hatred, the way you have been treating Remus all year.  
I am having trouble to believe that you are the same person who told me, fourteen years ago, that you would try and stick to the rules of decency in this war. Meaning you would not spy for both sides. Would not keep the outcome open for yourself by betraying both sides and remaining invaluable for each of them at the same time. You told me, after our somewhat lengthy discussion on pureblood matters that you do not wish to see the innocent killed. Is that still true, Severus? And how about the innocent being tossed into a life of rejection and poverty? In how far is that fair?

Minerva.

OOO

June 7th, 1994

He has my full sympathy.

* * *

July 26th, 1994

Dear Severus,

I am to inform you of an unscheduled staff meeting tomorrow night at ten. Yes, in the middle of the term. The reason is as follows:  
Albus has decided that informing our friends on the continent is the first step to catching the remains of Tom Riddle, as he likes to put it. However, seeing as hardly anybody believes he is still alive he believes that talking to them for a longer period of time will be necessary to explain all the details and our reasons for thinking he is still alive. Including you and all your knowledge about the matter, of course.  
He has chosen two people so far, who seem to have the greatest influence in their country as far as spreading news is concerned. One of them is your old friend Igor Karkaroff, whom I still cannot bring myself to trust, the other is Madame Maxime of Beauxbatons.  
The idea is to bring those two and, perhaps, some of their older students to Hogwarts to prepare them for what Albus calls the inevitable battle. You see, your presence will be required.

Regards,  
Minerva.


	20. Another Transcript

**27 July, 1994**

Transcript of the new term's first unscheduled staff meeting

_**Chairwizard:** Albus Dumbledore  
**Writer: **Mandragora Sprout  
**Location: **Headmaster's Office  
**Staff members present: **Albus Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall, Severus Snape, and Mandragora Sprout_

_**Guests: **Madame Maxime of Beauxbatons and Igor Karkaroff of Durmstrang_

**Today's topics:**  
1. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named  
2. International Magical Cooperation  
3. Misc.

**22:00** Meeting opens. First round of butterbeer - Stunningly beautiful young lady in exceptionally well-chosen purple everyday robes

**22:05** Professor Snape peers over writer's shoulder and enquires whether she has obtained a new quill. Indeed, Severus. They are the latest current fashion. You might have missed the changes in trend.

**22:06** Professor Snape informs writer that he is, of course, acquainted with quill-automatising spells, but that the flattering variety must have been designed specifically for exceptionally bored, pompous old women in need of -

**22:09** Due to an unforeseen destruction of my finest writing quill, transcript will have to be continued by hand. Thank you very much indeed, Severus.

**22:10** Chairwizard greets everyone and calls for attention. He then continues by introducing the two guests.

**22:12** Professor McGonagall eyes Igor Karkaroff suspiciously because, even though she does not want to admit it, his beard is giving her the creeps. She eventually asks Chairwizard to come to the point of the meeting, as it is already quite late.

**22:13** Chairwizard apologises, politely, and explains that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is regaining strength, although his whereabouts are still unknown. Fully aware of no one's doubt about this matter, Chairwizard suggests to strengthen international magical bonds, not only on a political level, but most of all amongst younger generations, who, in his opinion, have been the main backers of the previous war. Madame Maxime asks how Chairwizard can be so certain about the matter of You-Know-Who. Chairwizard expresses concern about revealing his sources and denies an answer.

**22:17** Igor Karkaroff suddenly remarks that he is interested in forging said bonds and exchanges A Look with Professor Snape. Is there anything I should be informed about, dears?

**22:18** Writer informs Professor Snape that this gesture was rude and entirely out of place. Professor McGonagall informs Professor Snape that he should act his age. Professor Snape informs both, Writer and Professor McGonagall that he is beginning to understand the origins of witch hunting. Professor McGonagall informs Professor Snape that she is always pleased to see weaker students come to late conclusions.

**22:22** Chairwizard demands attention. His suggestion for a strengthening of bonds is an exchange of students. Madame Maxime expresses her concern that Hogwarts students might not be able to keep up with her own school's high standards. Furthermore, they are regrettably not taught any French. Professor Snape remarks that a school named "Beautiful Batons" is hardly in a position to complain about linguistic shortcomings whatsoever. Madame Maxime informs Professor Snape that he ought to be careful when talking to someone twice his size. Professor McGonagall observes that size is a largely overrated value in sticks of any kind.

**22:28** After several minutes of surprised silence, restrained laughter appears from the general direction of Professor Snape and Igor Karkaroff. Writer demonstrates her support by conjuring a fan-banner.

**22:30** Second round of butterbeer - Severus

**22:40** Igor Karkaroff asks whether the old tradition of having schools compete against each other in the Triwizard Tournament has not always been the most intensive of all contacts. Chairwizard expresses grave concern about the general safety of the tournament. Professor Snape observes that a parent letting their child participate in Hogwarts's Quidditch matches will certainly not object to the three life-threatening tasks of the Triwizard Tournament. Professor McGonagall asks Professor Snape to focus on the topic at hand.

**22:50** Discussion on whether to abandon Quidditch during the course of the Tournament. Chairwizard requests a vote on whether to have a Tournament or not. Result: Four voices for the tournament, one abstention. Severus, you are a sad and grumpy old man.

**22:53** For reasons that WILL be discussed in private after the meeting with the parties concerned, Writer is sprouting MUSHROOMS from both ears and requires medical care. Luckily, she has some knowledge of this specific kind of botanic spell and is able to counteract it EFFORTLESSLY.

**23:00** Third round of butterbeer - Albus. Madame Maxime dares question the seriousness of Hogwarts staff meetings and receives a completely justified rebuke by Professor McGonagall. Professor Snape uses this specific moment to express his worries concerning the whereabouts of Emeric Flitwick.

**23:08** Laughter ends. Writer informs Professor Snape that our colleague is no longer suffering from the effects of the last staff meeting, however much you might have liked it, my dear.

**23:12** Chairwizard asks for suggestions for the Triwizard tasks. Professor McGonagall's cough sounds suspiciously like "Poem Competition".

**23:17** Laughter ends. Highly entertaining discussion concerning the absence of female rhymes in a certain Potions riddle poem designed to guard the Philosopher's Stone. Professor Snape refuses to participate.

**23:23** Writer observes that it must have been the worst poem written in the entire history of Hogwarts. Professor Snape expresses his concurrence and agrees to convey this to the person whom he forced to write it.

**23:24** Professor McGonagall requests a return to the topic at hand. Just a little too quickly, if I might add, dear.

**23:25** Suggestions are collected. Results: A visit of the Centaur village, a Sphinx's riddle, a dragon to be battled for some piece of treasure, the acquisition of confirmative information on the fact that Ollivander is wearing ladies' underwear, a dive into the Hogwarts lake, and a day spent in Professor Snape's Potions class.

**23:26** Writer is requested to erase all of the less serious suggestions.

**23:40** Discussion about the details of the three tasks ends with fourth round of butterbeer - Minerva

**23:45** Committee agrees that the safety measures have to be increased, since people have been complaining about champions dying during the tournament. Debate about details follows. Result: Chairwizard will speak to Bartimeus Crouch, age restriction will have to be discussed, specialist for the dark arts will be hired.

**23:50** Discussion on whom to let supervise the tournament causes questions concerning the next Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher to crop up. Severus Snape observes that there is handful of extremely skilled Aurors taking an interest in the profession of teaching Potions. Professor McGonagall questions relevance of this remark. Professor Snape replies that as opposed to those delving into average subjects, such as Transfiguration, Potions experts are often very familiar with the political proceedings of their time. Professor McGonagall observes that _some_ also decide to actively take part. Discussion is ended by one of the headmaster's chastising side-glances.

**23:59** Discussion on the potential acquisition of a sphinx is interrupted by Professor Snape counting the seconds towards midnight. Thank you, dear, you are being extremely helpful.

**0:08** Decision is made to send messengers to Romania, Egypt, and Russia, as well as the Ministry of Magic, to get to know all possible options for tasks. Writer offers to contact the Weasley family about possible dragons. Chairwizard asks for volunteers to dive into the Hogwarts lake before the end of the week in order to make contact with the Sea People.

**0:15** Professor McGonagall observes that this is just the task for an expert in the use of Gillyweed. Writer doubts that she will have time to do both errands. Professor Snape remarks that a certain deputy headmistress has just qualified for the job, considering her top marks in both, her Potions and her Herbology NEWTs. Professor McGonagall informs Professor Snape that the headmaster will join the dark side before she would allow anyone to see her in a swimming suit. The look Professor Snape throws Chairwizard assumes a somewhat pleading quality.

**0:20** Chairwizard appoints Professor Snape for the unwanted diving task. Writer makes plans to present him with purple swimwear.

**0:22** It is decided that the actual details of the tasks will be known by a selected number of people only to ensure that the prospective champions do not prepare too well in advance. Madame Maxime demands that Chairwizard remains as oblivious of the details of the Tournament as Igor Karkaroff and herself, but Professor Snape is able to convince her that this would result in a considerable safety leak. Thus, it is agreed that all three heads of school will be informed about all details of the tasks but are to pretend they know nothing in order to silence any potential accusations of cheating.

**0:26** Professor McGonagall observes that cheating has always been part of the tournament. Madame Maxime looks as though she is going to assassinate her. Igor Karkaroff remarks that Durmstrangs do not cheat. Very funny, my dear. I clearly remember reading about a particular Triwizard Tournament, in which -

**0:30** Due to a nasty accident involving a "mispronounced silencing spell" the rest of the meeting is officially cancelled.

* * *

**Author's Note:** What can I say? Sorry for the gap. I hope this and my concepts for the following chapters will be able to live up to the first part of this story. People have been so enthusiastic about Notes that I felt increasingly uneasy about updating it, to the extent that I was on the verge of leaving it as it is. Things are a lot better now, though, and I have finally decided to be brave. Don't kill me if the comedic quality of the transcripts of staff meeting seems to be deteriorating, please. It felt like a good way to find back into familiar waters. I promise there's some good stuff yet to come. As always, thanks for reading. Hope you enjoy the continuation of this as much as I do. 


	21. When Things Were Vague

_**Eighteenth series of notes: Aug 94 – Oct 94**_

Wednesday, 13 August, 1994

Dear Severus,

I hope your holidays have been pleasant and satisfactory so far. Mr. Crouch has flooed over this morning to discuss one or two minor matters concerning the Tournament. It seems Mandragora Sprout has been successful in her visit to the Weasleys and Emeric actually paid a visit to Romania to make some agreements concerning the first task. We will be getting four female dragons, all of them moderately vicious and, of course, mothers to be. Mr. Weasley and his colleagues are planning to bring them over some time beforehand in order to give them enough time to lay their eggs.

Hagrid appears to have lost his mind over the matter. I distinctly remember him doing a jig on one of the tables in the Three Broomsticks the other night. Madame Rosmerta has been in denial for a few days, but recovered greatly when Hagrid managed to replace all furniture within a week.

The interview with Marianna of the Merpeople seems to have gone even better than the headmaster anticipated. They agreed to host three people for the amount of time it takes the champions to complete their task. They will also provide a handful of Grindylows and a Kelpie as obstacles on the champions' way. This is particularly valuable as all the headmaster's attempts of recruiting the Giant Squid seem to have failed. A rather slippery being, if you ask me.

On a further note, Albus has now completed the security plans for all three tasks, and especially the maze, it has been decided, will be under constant surveillance by three or four specialists for the entire durance of the task. We shall be trying to reduce the sphinx's deadly stare to a mere numbing glance, in order to be able to enjoy more time with the champions after the tournament, should they fail.

Screens will have to be put up for the second and third task, in order to allow people to watch the actual proceedings. The headmaster and I have decided against the use of Muggle technology, however, which means that we will have to find a way of making screening technology work with the help of Potions, similar to Sir Jigger's Solution of Photographic Accuracy. You realise that your presence in the castle is required at your earliest convenience.

Best wishes,

Minerva.

OOO

Friday, 15 August, 1994

Dear Minerva,

Will be back as soon as possible. Holidays have been satisfactory though not exceedingly pleasant. Talk to you some time next week.

Greetings,

Severus.

Monday, 18 August, 1994

Dear Severus,

Mr. Bagman has chosen to withdraw his offer for a get together after all, but I am pleased to report that he has left two tickets for the Quidditch Worldcup in my possession. I am aware this is rather sudden, but would you care to join me? Morgana will be unable to come and I feel we should have at least one evening out before the new term starts. The coming year promises to become exceedingly stressful.

Minerva.

OOO

Monday, 18 August, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I thank you for the invitation, but unfortunately an urgent appointment that cannot be cancelled keeps me from pursuing leisure-time activities of any kind next Monday. Glad you will be able to go, however. Why not ask the headmaster to join?

Regards,

Severus.

OOO

Monday, 18 August, 1994

Dear Severus,

I understand. The headmaster seems to have other engagements, I am afraid, but perhaps Remus Lupin will take an interest. If there is any chance of changing your plans, let me know as soon as possible.

Minerva.

OOO

Monday, 18 August, 1994

Minerva, due to very fortunate circumstances my appointment happens to have been cancelled. Will be happy to keep you company.

Severus.

Tuesday, 26 August, 1994

Severus, I have no words describing what is going on inside me at the moment but I shall give you a chance to explain. WHERE did you run off to? WHAT did you do? And, most importantly, did you or did you not join the Death Eaters at their latest stunt? I must confess that I am confused and a little frightened of what happened at the Quidditch Worldcup, but I refuse to believe that you have taken part in it until I have heard your account. It is simply beyond my understanding and I refuse to believe that you, of all people, would simply side with your old friends again after so many years of good co-operation and what has become more than friendship between us. Please tell me, and tell me convincingly, that you have not.

Sincerely,

Minerva.

OOO

Wednesday, 27 August, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I got back home only now and heard about what happened after I left the Worldcup. The unfortunate coincidence will naturally imply certain things about me, but I can assure you that I am as astounded as you are over my former companions' latest exposition. There is no need to worry, of course. Lucius is losing his touch, if, that is, he was involved at all. Everyone was most likely just being drunk and spontaneous. Don't be too concerned, Minerva. The remaining Death Eaters are nostalgic fools who believe in the resurrection of times that are likely never to return again.

Just for the record, I did not, of course, join a group of uncontrolled maniacs out to endanger themselves and their friends by reliving a glorious past that has long come to its end. Who do you think I am?

Will be back at Hogwarts shortly. Apologies again that I had to leave so hurriedly. Talk to you as soon as possible.

Sincerely,

Severus.

OOO

Thursday, 28 August, 1994

Oh Severus, thank Merlin, finally a word from you. Where are you now? Excuse my persisting, but what is it that made you leave? I understand you received a letter from London?

OOO

Friday, 29 August, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I did receive a letter from mother a few days ago, which I have been awaiting for some time now. She was in St. Mungo's hospital and requested a visit, which I had originally planned to pay on Monday. I left the Worldcup upon receiving another letter, from one of the healers this time, saying that her condition was deteriorating, which was why I left in such a hurry. Forgive my sudden departure, but I felt no desire to join Mandragora and yourself in the tavern tent for the mere purpose of announcing my departure. I did leave a note, of course, as you know, which I would certainly not have done if I had planned to revive the old and foolish days of my youth.

Hope that clears things up. I am currently in Spinner's End, following another of your valuable pieces of advice. Talk to you soon.

Sincerely,

Severus.

OOO

Tuesday, 2 September, 1994

Dear Severus,

I confess myself relieved at seeing you at the staff table at tonight's feast. For a moment I was worried you would not turn up at all, seeing as I had expected to see you at yesterday's staff meeting. You will be glad to hear that the late arrival of our new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher was expected and not at all out of the ordinary. All in all, the start of the new term went extremely well. The new first-years seem a lot better behaved than usual, for some peculiar reason, but maybe I am getting old and have started forgetting what they are like when setting a foot into Hogwarts for the first time.

Did Alastor give you any details on what Draco Malfoy has done to deserve being turned into a ferret? I have not had the chance to speak to him again afterwards.

Also, as I will probably not see much of you during the next few days, won't you please tell me what happened between you and your father in Spinner's End? I am relieved and glad that you decided to speak to him at last, but I confess that this strikes me as astounding. The two of you making up is something I had stopped believing in. Also, I was not aware that you and your mother still had any contact at all. How did the visit go?

Hope to speak to you soon,

Minerva.

OOO

Wednesday, 3 September, 1994

Dear Minerva,

Regarding Draco Malfoy, I am no wiser than you are. Moody said something about an attack while his opponent had his back turned, but I assured him that there is no Hogwarts rule concerned with the finer details of duelling courtesy. I had Malfoy do lines for performing magic between classes, however. Hope this sounds like a reasonable solution to you as well.

As for Spinner's End – I admit, I never planned to tell you much about this particular visit, but as things turned out, I believe I could. After my visit in St. Mungo's (which went rather well, thank you, although mother is not the best partner in conversation at the moment) Smethwyk asked me to obtain some information on her previous medication, which I knew was still to be found in her bedroom in Spinner's End. I did go, after some hesitation, well aware that I was not actually prepared for a meeting with father. My greatest concern at that point was the relocation of several memories, which I had stored away so completely that the Dark Lord would have had to break my mind entirely and irrevocably to retrieve them – which, I think I can positively claim, will never happen. This is part of my personal protection, of course, which may give you an idea of how reluctant I was to retrieve the memories from my subconscious. Why, you may ask, did I need them at all? The answer is obvious. From my experience, dealing with father requires extremely quick thinking, which an addled or incomplete brain might only insufficiently do. I admit I have been rather careless in the choice of material that I stored away. The truth is that I hid so many memories in my Pensieve and behind the Occlumency wall inside my head that I had difficulty retrieving even my father's name. You might be surprised how much it is that I actually chose to "forget". But you can rest assured that I had profound reasons to do so.

Upon my arrival in Spinner's End, I considered carefully how to present myself before even turning round the corner. It seemed wisest to me to appear strong rather than weak and as dissimilar as possible to the seventeen year old boy who left so many years ago, in order to give father no false hope of returning to the old times when he still had so much power over my decisions.

As expected, he was rather taken aback to see me after taking several minutes trying to work out who I was. I used this moment's surprise to quickly inform him of the purpose of my visit. You will be glad to hear that he maintained considerable composure, considering the circumstances in which we parted, and asked me inside with a politeness unusual for what I remembered of him.

I then obtained the information I had come for, thanked the man and departed with no further difficulty.

I see you later today at Rosmerta's I expect.

Severus.

OOO

Friday, 5 September, 1994

Dear Severus,

Thank you for your recount. I must say, the ending seems a bit… abbreviated, but I shall not ask any further questions in view of your current mood. You are like a little kettle sometimes, do you know that? Must be practical in Potions.

On another note, would you please let Albus know that I arrived safely and will be back by Sunday, in time for the staff meeting? Sorry to have missed you last night. An urgent owl from Beauxbatons reached my office just slightly too late for me to leave you a note. I shall have to spend a few days in France making arrangements for the Triwizard Tournament. Wasting another of my rare free weekends, of course, but then, we have been to Notre Dame Cathedral (the wizarding part, quite naturally) this morning so it is rather like an extended mini break with the occasional professional interlude. Madame Maxime, I am pleased to report, is less of a moron than when we last parted.

Speak to you soon.

Sincerely,

Minerva.

OOO

Saturday, 6 September, 1994

Dear Minerva,

For some reason or the other the headmaster was fully aware of your absence and, indeed, where you had gone. You might want to check your private quarters for bugs. You are very much missed here, especially as our new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher seems to have taken to performing Unforgivable Curses during lessons. All his lessons, I might add, not only in front of sixth and seventh years. Why Dumbledore has not sacked him on the spot is beyond me. But once again, the headmaster seemed informed about the matter before anyone else. I can only hope that he knows what he is doing. If word of this reached the ministry, Merlin knows how they would react. Especially Bartimeus Crouch, who came over for a visit the other day to inspect some of the venues for the Tournament. (He believes Ben Hogg rather too steep for the purpose of a dragon fight, but Dumbledore assured him that our students are all very good climbers.)

I still feel rather uncomfortable around the minister, I must say. The man can be just as unpleasant as the Dark Lord in the old days, not counting the minister's bad breath, which is beyond comparison. Moody does not seem particularly fond of him either. His eye follows the old man around wherever he goes.

Hope to see you tomorrow.

Sincerely,

Severus.

Monday, September 15th, 1994

Is there a particular reason why your students are flooding the notice board with random advertisement for courses in cookery?

OOO

Monday, September 15th, 1994

I had not noticed.

OOO

Monday, September 15th, 1994

'Stew' or something?

OOO

Monday, September 15th, 1994

It is SPEW, Severus, and apparently one of Hermione Granger's more controversial ideas. Surely, it will be over in a few weeks when she realises that not all species have the same understanding of 'freedom' as human beings do.

OOO

Monday, September 15th, 1994

You should know better than to allow this kind of rubbish onto the notice board.

OOO

Monday, September 15th, 1994

Severus, I am in the middle of teaching an extremely fidgety class of first-years. Would you please refrain from sending your poor owl through the entire castle just to get on my nerves?

OOO

Monday, September 15th, 1994

Oh, me nerves, menerves…

OOO

Monday, September 15th, 1994

You are being childish.

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

I congratulate you on the best comeback Hogwarts has seen in years.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

He was annoying me.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

I hereby offer you a post as my personal Mad-Eye Moody basher. Mind you, it is a twenty-four hour job.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

Why, thank you, Severus, but I daresay we should not extend our hospitality that far.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

I am sure he would appreciate it. After all, it is a truth commonly acknowledged that your average Auror tends to harbour a secret desire of being bound and tortured by an attractive seventy-five-year-old ex-Quidditch captain. And what is it with his bottle?

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

Don't make me laugh. I am still teaching, as opposed to you. My students have begun to wonder why I receive constant owls between double lessons and during break time. Eruptions of laughter do not work towards my reputation, I can tell you.

On the subject of Alastor's bottle, I believe he is merely being careful. You of all people ought to know that he has reason to be. Working as an Auror is at least as straining as being in You-Know-Who's service, I am sure.

Talk to you later,

Minerva.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

The common term used amongst the people actually involved, I believe, is 'entertaining'.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

SEVERUS!

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

I apologise. Incidentally, why is it we are now back to defending that man? I preferred when you told him that the continuous use of anti-ageing potion was doing his general disposition no good.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

Well, he did call me an old hag.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

I believe he was joking, Minerva.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

Yes, well, I was joking, too.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

Of course.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

Incidentally, would you like to come over for dinner later this evening? At half seven, perhaps? I realised that my seventh-years' first essay is not due until Hallowe'en. Merlin knows how we are supposed to teach while our guests are here. Everyone will be too busy getting to know each other.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

Will the foreigners be attending Hogwarts classes?

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

I believe they will receive tuition of their own in their respective mobile realms. It seems the Durmstrangs are determined to use a boat to enter the Hogwarts lake, the advantage being that it has a direct link to Loch Shiel, of course. Dumbledore will lift the anti-Muggle barrier in time for them to pass through. That way Karkaroff will be able to bring not only a greater number of prospective champions, but also an inbuilt classroom and the school's own interior. Very practical man, Karkaroff. The Beauxbatons seem unsure whether to come by train or by coach, but it appears their journey will be somewhat longer than the Durmstrangs', ironic though that may seem. Madame Maxime is an excellent teacher and a very respectable person, of course, but her way of organising important events has always lacked determination.

Minerva.

OOO

Wednesday, October 7th, 1994

I see what you mean. I gladly accept your invitation, by the way. Some distraction from my impertinent second-years will do me a lot of good.

See you later,

Severus.


	22. When Things Continued

_**Nineteenth series of notes: Oct 94 – Nov 94**_

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

I will not be able to make the staff meeting tonight, Severus. Would you please apologise to Albus on my behalf? I still have not finished all the details of my lesson plan for the fourth-years tomorrow. Summoning Charms. You know how this class almost always ends in tears because someone accuses someone else of stealing?

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

As your classes tend to.

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

Impertinence, Mr. Snape. How dare you? Then again, I am sure this must be the impression YOU got out of seven years of Transfiguration. Personally, I was on a constant verge of tears when reading and marking your essays. A truly sad display.

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

And yet, the NEWT exams proved you wrong, did they not?

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

THE NEWT EXAMS, Severus Snape, proved that you were a fully accomplished Legilimens quite a bit SOONER than you had everyone believe in those days. DON'T think I don't know!

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

My, are we imaginative today, deputy headmistress. You make me want to attend the lesson you are currently cooking up, purely because it is likely that it will not be as unoriginal as your usual ones. I shall inform the headmaster that you are in no fit state of talking to grown-up people. He will understand.

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

What did we say we would call him?

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

I forgot. "Professor Dumbledore Just For Practice". As always, your assumptions are preposterous and I am going to prove you wrong.

Severus.

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

Well, do try and survive without calling someone master or headmaster for a few months and I shall gladly take back everything I said. Even the bit about Death Eaters being nothing but spoilt children unable to take responsibility for their lives and others'. There you go. I put it in writing.

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

Do not annoy me at this time of the night, Minerva. We have been through this. Your assumptions are insulting and ridiculous. I have nothing else to say.

OOO

Wednesday, October 21st, 1994

Of course not. Sleep well, Severus. I shall talk to you in the morning

Sunday, October 25th, 1994

Severus, would you please remember to put up a sign reminding the students of the foreigners' arrival at the end of the week? I believe Dumbledore decided to shorten the Friday afternoon lesson by thirty minutes, but you might want to double-check with him.

Greetings,

Minerva.

OOO

Sunday, October 25th, 1994

As you wish, deputy headmistress. Can I safely assume then that the Triwizard Cup has reappeared then?

OOO

Sunday, October 25th, 1994

Indeed. It's former owner was quite reluctant of letting it go, quite naturally, but Albus's persuasive skills are unequalled, of course. I told him he could have just bought a new one, but it seems the passing on of the old cup is traditional and something the headmaster would like to see continued.

We have also, I believe, had quite a few problems creating an impartial object of judgement for the tournament. All manufacturers of Disinterested Disks, for instance, are British and thus not to our fellow heads' liking. It seems that Fudge now managed to persuade some German dwarfs to lend us a Goblet of Fire, however, which would be perfect for our purpose because the old dwarf runes can rarely be fooled, of course.

Minerva

OOO

Sunday, October 25th, 1994

I hate to tell you, but from what I know about dwarf runes, they are just adaptations of the old Anglo Saxon muggle runes. They have no magic power whatsoever except over people who believe in them.

OOO

Sunday, October 25th, 1994

It is very apparent to me that you have been as attentive in the Study of Ancient Runes as you have always been in Transfiguration.

OOO

Sunday, October 25th, 1994

It is very apparent to me that you must be suffering from old-age memory loss. I do not believe I ever studied Ancient Runes.

OOO

Sunday, October 25th, 1994

The fact that you never attended does not mean that you were not technically registered, Severus. Perenelle told me that your general attitude towards the subject was almost as bad as your attitude towards Flying.

OOO

Sunday, October 25th, 1994

I DID attend Flying!

OOO

Sunday, October 25th, 1994

Occasionally, yes. I am sorry, Severus, willing though I would be to continue our delightful conversation, I really have to get some work done. Talk to you in the morning.

Saturday, October 31st, 1994

Very well, I shall keep my eyes open. And SHOULD I find out that it was Potter after all who put his name into the goblet, BELIEVE me I shall take steps.

OOO

Saturday, October 31st, 1994

Like what, Severus? A punishment worse than having to stand up to three tasks that require magic which is way beyond the limits of a fourth-year? I'll be VERY curious what you would come up with.

OOO

Saturday, October 31st, 1994

It is NOT a punishment for him! He CHOSE to do this, and he chose it for a REASON!

OOO

Saturday, October 31st, 1994

You will excuse my continuing doubt, but I am afraid Albus's assumptions seem far more reasonable. Incidentally, there will be another meeting with Alastor and Crouch to discuss additional security measures this evening. Will you be able to attend?

OOO

Saturday, October 31st, 1994

You know as well as I do that Hagrid and I are overseeing the transport of the Sphinx. I told the headmaster, but he has probably forgotten. Let me know what Moody cooks up.

See to you later.

OOO

Sunday, November 1st, 1994

Dear Severus,

Please note that Ludovic Bagman has been decided upon as the final judge for the Tournament. Crouch is not happy, I assure you, but even he cannot deny that Bagman's office demands his involvement. Crouch is certain that Bagman will not be impartial, but Albus says we cannot deny him a place among the judges, so there you go.

We also have three additional security measures for the first task. One is a chain, which will keep the dragon at least vaguely in its place, another concerns the second task (Albus has agreed on a Lifeboat Enchantment after all but he refuses to make it literal), and the third will be two specialists from the Ministry of Magic, who are going to keep an eye on the dragons' range of fire (it has been suggested that we apply Freezing Charms on their snouts from the beginning, but Albus says this is ridiculous and taking security measures one step too far. Alastor agrees with him, for some peculiar reason).

Do you get the feeling that Alastor has changed a lot since he last visited Hogwarts, by the way? I cannot help but find that he is rather more willing to take risks than he used to – and albeit his obsession with security, he has never before refused to take an afternoon's tea with me. I am sure he is getting old, although that would be to admit that I am as well, seeing as he was in my year at Hogwarts.

Anyway, I shall talk to you shortly.

Greetings,

Minerva.

OOO

Sunday, November 1st, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I thank you very much for the update. Concerning Moody, I have to admit that apart from the occasional duel, one of which almost got me into Azkaban, of course, I have not had the pleasure of learning as much about him as would doubtless be beneficial for our relationship. Fact is that he seems to bear a grudge for me blasting his foot and not spending at least a night in prison for it. I cannot think why he is being so grouchy about it, of course. Particularly since it was Rosier who finished the rest of his leg through no fault of mine.

He has taken a peculiar liking to attempting to threaten me, though. For some reason he seems obsessed with the idea that the Dark Lord will want to kill me should he ever come back to power. Indeed, he seems positively thrilled by the fact and tends to remind me of it whenever he can. Sometimes I feel the strong urge of throwing his threats right back in his face, but I am afraid that would ruin my chances of getting his job once and for all.

Speak to you later,

Severus.

Monday, November 2nd, 1994

What on earth are Bouncing Bulbs?

Friday, November 6th, 1994

Minerva, would you remind Hagrid to bring some rats from his next trip to the forest? I hear you were going to speak to him in the afternoon and I cannot bring myself to leave the dungeon while there are students working on the Potions NEWTs project.

Thanks,

Severus.

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

I am tempted to inform you that there is such a thing as Hogwarts owls, but as you have been behaving quite admirably during these past few days, I shall do you the favour.

Minerva.

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

What do you mean, I have been "behaving" admirably?

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

Well, I would have expected you to grade Potter quite unfairly, but after seeing his latest Potions grade, it seems that you are perfectly capable of pulling yourself together.

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

Preposterous. I am never unfair. He wrote a good passage on side-effects of ageing potions and I rewarded him a C. It is straightforward enough. He does not usually show this kind of aptitude, thus his disastrous results. You should know that I am more of a teacher than you give me credit for.

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

You are less of a grouchy old fool in any case.

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

Incidentally, are you going to visit your parents this weekend? Your mother appeared on my doorstep the other night and I could not do much but point her to the fact that we have never been engaged and, indeed, not been seeing each other for several months now.

Severus.

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

That woman is unbelievable. Thank you for telling me. I am afraid I will not have the time to speak to her before next week, but that should be sufficient. She did not get radical, I hope? When it comes to tradition she can be as persistent as you in your days. Indeed, had she lived in your or my generation I would not have been surprised to see her with a certain tattoo.

Minerva.

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

What tattoo?

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

You know, the one on your left forearm.

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

It is NOT a tattoo, it's a SIGN!

OOO

Friday, November 6th, 1994

A sign? Who designed it? It is a bit corny, don't you think?

Thursday, November 12th, 1994

First level poisoning on the third floor, Severus! We need an antidote to what appears to be Ashwinder Essence!

OOO

Thursday, November 12th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

Please find attached, a bezoar.

Sincerest greetings,

Severus.

OOO

Thursday, November 12th, 1994

Dear Severus,

Thank you very much indeed for your hearty support. Of course, the stone did its job but I cannot help thinking that there was a bit of luck involved.

On a different note, is there a reason why you awarded Hufflepuff a hundred and seventy points at once today?

Minerva.

OOO

Thursday, November 12th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

Of course there is. I tend to have reasons for giving out points, as you know, and in this case there are plenty of them. You will be thrilled to hear, though, that I have not sunk as low as to try and push Hufflepuff first place only to see Gryffindor lose. Such thoughts tend to form in your paranoid mind only, without the slightest basis in facts.

Severus.

OOO

Thursday, November 12th, 1994

Well, what did you award them for?

OOO

Thursday, November 12th, 1994

I am NOT answerable to you in this matter, Minerva.

OOO

Thursday, November 12th, 1994

In fact, you are, but I will stop asking. Your reply tells me everything I need to know.


	23. When Things Got Ticklish

_**Twentieth Series of Notes: Nov 94**_

Saturday, November 14th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I shall be away until tomorrow. Urgent business in London. Nice badges. Who designed them?

Greetings,

Severus.

OOO

Saturday, November 14th, 1994

Dear Severus,

Thank you, I shall inform the headmaster if you have not done so yourself already. The badges, I believe, appeared in Slytherin hands for the first time, but I might be mistaken.

Speak to you on Sunday night.

Minerva.

Sunday, November 15th, 1994

Dear Severus,

A student has just been to see me with a strange story. It seems, there was a fight in your classroom and you gave detention only to the Gryffindor party involved? If there is any basis in fact whatsoever, I would like to remind you that this is a direct breach of the most recent statute on Hogwarts punishments. Please report back to me as soon as possible. I know you are busy, but this is something that vexes me greatly, as there have been similar incidences before as I do not have to remind you, without a doubt.

Sincerely,

Minerva.

OOO

Sunday, November 15th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

This is, of course, none of your business, but I shall explain to you exactly what happened just to satisfy your innate curiosity. Potter and Weasley picked a fight in front of my classroom. I was not there, so I cannot know for sure if they were actually the ones who started it. I do have a strong suspicion, however, as they made it impossible for anyone to explain to me – calmly and rationally – what had actually happened. I found myself continuously shouted at, interrupted, and even insulted by the two boys, which is why I saw fit to punish them in this manner. This had nothing to do with the fight itself, which I did not witness, but with your boys' general behaviour.

You will be pleased to hear that I did admonish Mr. Malfoy not to get involved in fights of this kind at a later point, however. I must ask you not to suggest that I am being unfair towards our students when you know only half the story, Minerva. You jump to conclusions all to readily these days.

Severus.

OOO

Monday, November 16th, 1994

Dear Severus,

With all due respect, you are giving me enough reasons. Your teaching methods are questionable at best and your attitude towards criticism is getting worse each year that you are denied your desired post.

Other than that, I apologise if I interfered to an unacceptable extent. It is my duty to clear these matters up as the deputy headmistress, as you know.

I hope to talk to you tonight.

Greetings,

Minerva.

* * *

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

Considering the current situation, I suggest that you prevent either Potter or Granger from joining the trip to Hogsmeade this weekend. Would you agree?

Sincerely,

Severus.

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

Do not be ridiculous, Severus. They are barely fourteen.

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

As I understand it, Miss Granger is already fifteen. Not that it matters much. Children these days discover their adult parts at the age of ten, get familiar with them at eleven, and get familiar with each other's by the time they come to Hogwarts. It is our duty to prevent that. Really, Minerva, I would trade supervision duty at the castle for the safety of knowing that neither Granger nor Potter will be in any position to "disappear briefly" in one of Madame Rosmerta's near soundproof bathrooms.

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

Severus, what gives you the ridiculous idea that those two would break the school rules in such an appalling manner? I am aware that you are prone to blind guessing when it comes to my students, but this is taking the notion of "healthy caution" a little too far, do you not think?

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

Tell me, Minerva, can you read?

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

I daresay you are well aware that I have a Daily Prophet subscription. And yes, I am aware of Rita Skeeter's latest stunt. However, I am disinclined to believe a word of what she and her Quick Quotes Quill tend to come up with, seeing as I happen to know the person who invented the item. As opposed to others, who will use any opportunity of worsening certain students' already bad reputation.

It is with happiness that I am therefore able to tell you that most Hogwarts students have a full grasp of their sexual identity and actions these days. They tend to be extremely aware what consequences a quick get-together in Rosmerta's bathrooms would bring and thus avoid such things. I fully understand your concern, of course. At the age of fifteen, YOU were still of the opinion that babies were magicked into their mothers' wombs.

Sincerely,

Minerva.

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

Was not!

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

I was there, my dear.

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

A student's prank on her elderly teacher. What do you expect?

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

Severus, I was certain that you were joking until I saw your attempts at transfiguring a pincushion into a female porcupine.

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

It was perfectly alive and well!

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

The poor thing would not have been able to procreate, Severus!

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

How do you want to know?

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

You forgot to remove one of the PINS, if you catch my drift.

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

Well, males can procreate.

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

I distinctly remember you giving it a uterus as well.

OOO

Thursday, November 19th, 1994

Did not! You said yourself at the time that it was in FINE physical condition!

OOO

Friday, November 20th, 1994

The uterus is a female organ, Severus. Not a disease. Apologies for not getting right back on you, by the way. My mother flooed over last night and I could not seem to get rid of her for almost two hours.

Greetings,

Minerva.

OOO

Friday, November 20th, 1994

No worries. I was quite busy myself. Is she still insisting on a marriage?

OOO

Friday, November 20th, 1994

Worse. Far worse.

To be honest, I do not quite know what to do with her. She seems particularly eager for me to get remarried. Apparently, when she and Topaz's father arranged our marriage, they were foolish enough to use an Unbreakable Vow. Now, the exact wording of this vow is still giving her a headache now. It seems they promised to each other that I would be safely married and looked after at old age. Now, you know me. I spent the best part of last night yelling at her that an Unbreakable Vow should NEVER be made using such imprecise wording. It might happen now that one of them drops dead any moment because the spell interprets her words quite randomly… but I am starting to sound like Sybil Trelawney. Spells are not conscious, of course. However, I am sure you will appreciate the seriousness of the problem. What mother said was so imprecise that no one seems to know exactly what will be the outcome of this vow. Both, mother and Topaz's parents seem to assume that if I am not married by the time I reach my seventy-fifth birthday (which is the magic number of years by which every witch in the country considers herself 'old', of course) either or both of Topaz's parents might die.

It is all quite complicated and I would rather not burden you with my problems, though. So I shall simply be looking forward to seeing you tonight.

Greetings,

Minerva.

OOO

Friday, November 20th, 1994

What was the exact wording of that spell, Minerva?

OOO

Friday, November 20th, 1994

Oh, Severus, I do not know. Nor do I feel much like thinking about it at the moment. I speak to you tonight when I am less worn out, hopefully.

* * *

Sunday, November 22nd, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I would like to apologise for spending the night in your quarters. It was entirely inappropriate and does neither of us much good at present. I was not lying, however. I cannot remember anything that happened during the night or, indeed, much of what happened during the evening. Has Professor Sprout spoken to you today?

Sincerely,

Severus.

OOO

Sunday, November 22nd, 1994

Dear Severus,

I, too, need to apologise for my behaviour. I was shocked and very taken aback by the very discomforting situation of seeing you… like that again. You will realise that the marriage discussion with my mother has brought back some uncomfortably pleasant memories. Fact remains, however, that inter-staff relations are an unnecessary danger to everyone and have to be avoided.

It seems, by the way, that the dragons are going to arrive today. We shall need every available hand. Would you care to join us?

Minerva.

OOO

Sunday, November 22nd, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I shall speak to Mandy as soon as I have the time. Will possibly just drop her a little note asking for an explanation. It is good to hear that the dragons arrived at last. I know the headmaster has been worried that they might not arrive in time.

See you later,

Severus.

OOO

Sunday, November 22nd, 1994

Dear Severus,

Would you please remind Hagrid that he needs to tell the headmaster whether or not he is going to take Madame Maxime to see the dragons or not? Today is the last chance of inconspicuously doing so.

Thank you,

Minerva.

OOO

Sunday, November 22nd, 1994

What are you talking about? As I understand it, the first task is to be kept secret until further notice.

OOO

Sunday, November 22nd, 1994

I apologise. I forgot you have not been present at the respective staff meeting. We agreed that, since cheating is a long tradition in this tournament and since we did not introduce any safety measures worth mentioning at all except for the age barrier, we might see to it that all champions are informed prior to the actual task of what will await them. To give them time to prepare. That will be the best way of knowing they will at least be able to ensure their own bodily safety. Particularly in Potter's case this is more than desirable.

Speak to you later,

Minerva.

OOO

Sunday, November 22nd, 1994

Dear Minerva,

As always, I do not see why the headmaster takes the trouble of announcing rules if he breaks them again not twenty-four hours later. I will see if Hagrid is available without delay.

Sincerely,

Severus.

* * *

Monday, November 23rd, 1994

Dear Minerva,

Severus has written me the most interesting note concerning our little drinking event at the Three Broomsticks. Yes, it needs to be called that because a drinking event is what I intended it to be. For a very specific purpose. Really, I must say I was more than pleasantly surprised to hear that you two did indeed end up where you belong – in the same bedroom (and hopefully in the same bed – Severus refused to specify). Let me explain a few things to you, my dear friend, to make up for my undeniably straightforward behaviour.

I have known you for several decades now, Minerva. You and young Snape, who has, as we all noticed, grown into a man rather slower than we all expected. I know you have always liked the boy a lot, if in a more caring sort of way at first and only gradually the way you like him now. How I know this? Looks, Minerva. Movements. Small, subtle things that would escape an innocent bystander's eye. Not mine, however. I know your longing, my friend. Both of you have such a deep desire to be with each other that I have been wondering for a while whether it would not be advisable for one of you to step aside from teaching to allow you to be together.

What happened the other night was the final proof. You two gravitate towards each other whenever you meet. On behalf of the entire staff, I would like to suggest for Severus to lay aside his position as Potions Master and Head of House to become your husband.

Love,

Mandy.


	24. When Things Trudged

_**Twenty-First Series of Notes: Nov 94 – Jan 95**_

Monday, November 23rd, 1994

Mandragora Pomona Sprout,

I thank you very much indeed for clearing up this highly embarrassing matter. I was wondering whether my senses were deceiving me. Please rest assured that this effort of yours did not prove anything I or Severus did not know already. I am well aware what I would like and also what I would not be prepared to give up for a future with him. Among these things is certainly my position as Dumbledore's adviser and, please do not forget, as Hogwarts' deputy headmistress.

As for your suggestion of Severus stepping aside, I shall treat this as one of your tasteless jokes. You cannot seriously suggest such a ridiculous thing. My mother would go berserk if my husband (should there ever be another) required me to work and pay for our living. You know as well as I do that this is not an option within the more traditional pureblood families.

To be honest, Mandy, I do not have the time, nor do I feel like discussing these things at the moment. The first task of the Triwizard Tournament will be tomorrow and I still have not found a way of letting Cedric Diggory know exactly what it contains. I am sure he will be fine under any circumstances, given his most recent overall marks, but it does not seem fair that he should be the only one not to know about the dragons in advance.

Sincerely,

Minerva.

OOO

Monday, November 23rd, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I apologise for owling you at this time of the night, but I thought you should be informed that Mr. Diggory has now full knowledge of the task ahead and will go to battle entirely prepared. Rest assured that I was being more than subtle. It is the Hufflepuff way, of course.

Love,

Mandy.

OOO

Monday, November 23rd, 1994

Two words: kilt incident.

Saturday, November 28th, 1994

Dear Severus,

In the hope that you are well enough to receive messages, I would like to tell you that several matters of importance have been decided on during our most recent staff meeting. I am very sorry you missed it. We had a highly entertaining discussion concerning the nature of recent journalism.

You will be happy to know that your request of permission for practical antidote testing in class has been granted by the governors. Congratulations. It seems you have gained the trust of more than fifty percent of their members now, which is an incredible achievement considering your… former occupation. One word of caution, however. If you so much as think of poisoning Potter, blaming the after-effects on his badly devised antidote, and thereby knocking him out for the second task, I shall personally put your head in a cauldron full of acid. I had an O in my Potions NEWTs, I will have you know.

Furthermore, I need to tell you that there will be a traditional Yule Ball on December 25th. Formal wear and active participation by all members of staff required. I shall be looking forward to seeing you in your dress robes again, dearest.

Love,

Minerva.

OOO

Saturday, November 28th, 1994

Dear Mandy,

I would like to apologise for my inappropriate behaviour during the staff meeting today. The situation at home is incredibly tense and the worse it gets, the more I feel inclined to take it out on my colleagues. This is entirely unprofessional, of course. I was wrong with nearly everything I said and I can assure you that I would not normally have reacted to your unsuitable remark so very rudely.

Please rest assured that I still consider you my friend and that I appreciate your concern. I stand by what I said about the decision resting with me, but of course I want you to have a part in these things, as best friends ought to have. Let me briefly tell you exactly what is behind all this so that you can appreciate why I am so torn.

The Unbreakable Vow my parents agreed to prior to Topaz's and my wedding, which I mentioned to you before, had the exact wording: "We promise to assure financial as well as emotional married safety for the rest of our children's days, particularly at old age" – which is seventy-five, of course. It seems that if Topaz's and my divorce could have been interpreted as a breaking of this vow, all four of them would be dead already. But my main worry concerns the last part saying, 'particularly at old age'. This specifies an exact date and will certainly initiate a reaction of some sort, if I know anything about Unbreakable Vows.

Severus knows hardly anything about the matter, of course. I did tell him some things, but also made it very clear that this is my problem, not his. I do not with to pull him into something that is entirely my parents' responsibility, Mandy. I wish to see him safe. The reason why I cannot allow this relationship to happen is entirely obvious. Albus needs as many supporters at Hogwarts as possible at the moment. The Ministry is toying with the thought of applying Educational Degrees and using some basic power they still have over the school to get him under their control again. If this comes to pass – if the Ministry of Magic actually sees fit to send one of their members to Hogwarts for observational purposes, we shall have to stick together tightly to push through some of our less conventional ideas. Let us hope this never comes to pass.

I need hardly mention that there is also an additional reason for keeping Severus at Hogwarts. It is his job, in a double sense, to interact with Albus. If he is right assuming that You-Know-Who is gaining strength at the moment (for whatever reason) it will be vital that he remains in a position where he is indispensable to the other side. Otherwise, I fear, I would be widowed quicker than I can say 'wedding ring'.

You see, things are not always as easy as you suggested today. You are twisting reality if you claim love is all a couple needs for a happy future. Please maintain a clear perception, as I shall not be able to do all future thinking by myself.

Love,

Minerva.

OOO

Monday, November 30th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I understand what you are saying. The whole situation was not at all as clear to me as it is now and I apologise for acting in what must have appeared a rather adolescent manner to you. Here is a proposition, though: when YKW is defeated we will meet with the headmaster, discuss this superfluous rule that forbids inter-staff relations, and get him to be Severus's best man for the wedding. How about it?

Mandy.

OOO

Monday, November 30th, 1994

Dear Mandy,

I appreciate your optimism, I really do. But this is thinking too far ahead. We shall discuss this further when the situation has changed for the better.

Love,

Minerva.

* * *

Friday, December 18th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

Is it in your power to prevent that matters concerning the tournament be kept from interfering with the students' work? Half my students are unable to concentrate on anything but the upcoming Yule Ball and Rita Skeeter is becoming an unbearable nuisance. Not that I read her articles. But I will not allow Potter to miss half his lessons for having his picture taken. There is simply no necessity for that.

Regards,

Severus.

OOO

Friday, December 18th, 1994

Dear Severus,

Stop being so gruff. I apologise that we were unable to find a time where all four champions were available, but Potter has far less free periods than his three older fellow students. We had to compromise.

I see you later, hopefully.

Love,  
Minerva.

OOO

Friday, December 18th, 1994

As usual, there is nothing I can say to contradict. I do not like it, however.

Yes, see you soon.

Severus.

Wednesday, December 23rd, 1994

Dear Severus,

I have been thinking long and very hard about this but I shall have to ask you a very serious question: would you like to accompany me to the Yule Ball? Officially, I mean. There is no reason why this should not be possible. People will expect me to grant the headmaster one of the many dances due to my and his position, but other than that I should very much love to spend the evening with you. It is, of course, an opportunity for all of us to let our hair down. And while I am aware that your vigilance never ceases, I should like to see you relaxing a little and having one or the other drink with me. Barring the interference of Mandragora Sprout, of course, who I think is going to be happy enough joining Albus for his remaining dances.

What do you say?

Minerva.

OOO

Wednesday, December 24th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I thank you very much for the invitation. I have been considering till now what exactly I would like to do and have come to the conclusion, I am afraid, that it will be impossible for me to join you for the Yule Ball. At all. The headmaster wants active watching of the school grounds for students who might take the notion of 'letting one's hair down' as a semi legal chance of taking liberty with certain school rules. Argus and I agreed that he alone is not going to be up for this task. He has agreed to patrol most of the larger classrooms, we will position watchers in and around the corridor that leads to the Room of Requirements, and the grounds, particularly the rose gardens, I am afraid, will need constant watching. Since the headmaster saw fit to grant Hagrid his wish of letting him off duty for the night, it is clear that I cannot deny him the favour of doing Hagrid's job. Therefore, I shall not be able to attend the dance.

I am very sorry about this. I would have liked to do you the favour, not least because spending any evening with you is always giving me great pleasure. There might be another opportunity soon, of course. We could celebrate my birthday somewhere far away for a change, for instance. I should very much like to not have to stand another of Mandragora's speeches and embarrassing presents.

See you in a bit.

Severus.

OOO

Wednesday, December 24th, 1994

Dear Severus,

I am sorry to hear that you will be on duty tomorrow night. Do not worry, I understand Albus's concern. And yours, of course. Did I understand Albus correctly that you have received a sign of actual activity for the first time this year?

Minerva.

OOO

Wednesday, December 24th, 1994

Dear Minerva,

I have indeed. You know, of course, that the Mark has become stronger all year. It is in the nature of the Dark Mark to function as a means of communication between the Death Eaters and their leader. When the Dark Lord was defeated, however, the Mark's physical attributes (a constant tingling as a reminder of his presence, as well as reactions to his current mood in form of burning or tickling) died down. I have not perceived a single reaction from the Dark Mark until earlier this year. The end of May, I believe it was.

Severus.

OOO

Wednesday, December 24th, 1994

The end of WHAT? It has been SEVEN months? WHY was I not informed of this?

OOO

Wednesday, December 24th, 1994

I did not see a reason to worry you. It might have been a temporary occurrence, after all.

OOO

Wednesday, December 24th, 1994

Severus, you NEED to tell me these things! Otherwise I cannot know what is going on in your mind. Was this during the time when you were toying with the idea of visiting your father?

OOO

Wednesday, December 24th, 1994

Precisely.

OOO

Wednesday, December 24th, 1994

I am SO sorry, Severus. You should have told me. There would have been something I could have done, I am sure of it. Did you not feel you needed to talk?

OOO

Wednesday, December 24th, 1994

When have I ever given you the impression that I feel the need to talk? Apologies, but I shall head upstairs in a few moments, preparing a few spells for tomorrow night. Speak to you at dinner.

Severus.

* * *

January 4th, 1995

Dear Severus,

The term's first day is not entirely over and I have already received two complaints from students of my own house stating that you took fifty points off one of the boys for mere laughing. Would you care to elaborate?

Minerva.

OOO

January 5th, 1995

Dear Minerva,

My apologies for not replying sooner. I was down at Hagrid's to see what he thought about the most recent Prophet article. I must say, we both agreed that it was rather ill-advised and I heartily supported his decision to remain away for a few days until the commotion due to his now revealed identity has ebbed away again. Personally, of course, I find it hard to believe that there are people who have not realised before this that there is giant blood in him. After all, it is not exercise that has turned him into what he is.

Regarding the fifty points, the matter is related. You know I will not have chatting in my class. And you know I will not allow people to occupy themselves with extracurricular activities, such as newspaper reading. What, for me, warranted fifty points and a detention, however, was the fact that Mr Jordan seemed to find the idea that someone could be part giant so funny that his subsequent behaviour disturbed the lesson to an annoying extent. Teenager or not, I will not have that kind of behaviour in my class. It is specist, adolescent, and ridiculous.

Greetings,

Severus.

OOO

January 5th, 1995

Explanation accepted. A similar thing happened with my Hufflepuffs yesterday. I must say I am not amused at all. Ah well. Another five-foot essay on wizarding law concerning giants to correct. It is not as though we did not have enough to do as it is.

Severus, why did you encourage Hagrid hiding away from us? He has not attended a single meal since the article came out and I am starting to get slightly worried that he will never come out again. Just because, quite naturally, lessons need to continue, I have now been obliged to find a substitute teacher until Hagrid is prepared to break his isolation again. Goodness, I think I am rather stressed out today, Severus. Please no more owls. I shall speak to you in the morning.

Love,

Minerva.

Tuesday, January 12th, 1995

Giant squid removed from Hogwarts lake and relocated to a suitable replacement loch in preparation for the second task. Anything else you wish me to oversee, deputy headmistress?

OOO

Tuesday, January 12th, 1995

Yes, indeed. Professor Moody has requested two Grindylows and a Jobberknoll the other day and someone needs to re-release them. Particularly as there are few Grindylows in the lake at the moment and they are vital to the second task. Would you do me the favour?

Love,

Minerva.

OOO

Tuesday, January 12th, 1995

Not a chance. You know I am not talking to that man.

OOO

Tuesday, January 12th, 1995

Severus, is there a particular reason why you have such great problems adjusting with the presence of Alastor Moody at Hogwarts? None of the other Aurors seems to provide as great a problem for you as he does.

Minerva.

OOO

Tuesday, January 12th, 1995

Well, none of the others is whispering stories into my ear during breakfast concerning your shared past. Little secrets and the like. It is really not very tasteful. Particularly after I told him we had absolutely no interest at all in coming together again.

Severus.

OOO

Tuesday, January 12th, 1995

I am happy to inform you that there is no 'past' or anything else I share or wish to share with Alastor Moody.

Sincerely,

Minerva (Deputy Headmistress)

OOO

Tuesday, January 12th, 1995

I am happy to inform you that it is astounding how much a random fellow student could have known about certain details then. 'Oh, Alastor. Touch my tartan bra…' Please.

Severus (Ex-Death Eater, Spy, Legilimens, and most well-informed wizard at the castle, except perhaps for the headmaster, who is a genius)

OOO

Friday, January 15th, 1995

Seriously, Severus. First, the bra matter was probably a wild guess on his side. I have or had no interest _whatsoever_ in Mad-Eye Moody, the person who thinks that drinking in class will solve his didactic problems for him. Second, don't write things like that on a note. Transfigured or not, I do not wish a particularly capable student to decipher your spell by pure accident. One unfortunate event like that would blow your identity, as you are well aware.

Greetings,

Minerva.

OOO

Friday, January 15th, 1995

Strange to hear that you have so little faith in my transfiguration capabilities.

OOO

Friday, January 15th, 1995

Let's just say I know what I am talking about, seeing as I was forced to teach you for seven years.

OOO

Friday, January 15th, 1995

Hey! I was not always the complete failure you mark me out to be!

OOO

Friday, January 15th, 1995

One question, purely out of interest – if you were, say, to transfigure a horse into a cow… how many stomachs would you give it?

Best wishes,

Minerva.

OOO

Friday, January 15th, 1995

I would give it a tartan bra, just to spite you.


End file.
